May 2013 Moms

Life is too much for me...

I love my daughter and absolutely want nothing but the best for her but I can't help but cry. Since she was born on May 9th we have had several different issues with her. She did not take to formula - we started with Gerber Good Start Gentle to Enfamil Prosobee to Enfamil Nutramigen and now she is on Similac Alimentum. The only one that seems to be helping is the Alimentum. She was born 7lbs 8oz and currently weighs 8lbs 9.5oz. We went to a Pediatric Gastroenterologist who changed our the portions of water to formula powder. We have to put 2 full scoops of powder to 3 and a half oz of water. She showed no improvement so they asked us to add rice cereal to see if she would gain weight on this. Our next doctor we have to go to is a Pediatric Eye Specialist because she is not following the toy in front of her so they want to see if there is anything wrong with her eyes. She does however look at you and will turn her head towards you when you leave the room or move somewhere near her.

Today our pediatrician who I trust and love not only because he was mine growing up called and told us we need to make an appointment for a Pediatric Neurologist. He wants us to make the appointment because she only gained about 1lb, is not able to follow and her head is smaller then it should be even though it is portioned with her body.

Needless to say I am extremely upset and I don't know how much more I can handle. I partially feel like this is my fault. Some of my background is I had a seizure in 2009 and have been on medication ever since. When my DH and I found out we were pregnant it was too late for me to have the option of stopping the medication or still taking it. So I am not even sure how I should be feeling at this point. The only thing I can say is that my life would not be the same without her and I wouldn't change anything for the world. I am just hoping and saying my prayers that at least if something is wrong we are catching it now and not later on.

Re: Life is too much for me...

  • Sending virtual hugs. Hang in there and don't blame yourself. Thoughts and prayers for you and your LO!
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  • pnutgpnutg member
    Prayers for your sweet girl
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  • sending hugs your way, I hope and pray all is well with her
  • Hang in there and continue seeking and advocating for the best care for your little girl. Sending positive thoughts your way!

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    My little bug, Madeline. Born June 2, 2013.

  • So sorry you're going through this, hope the situation improves soon!
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  • Big hugs to you!!
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    IVF/ICSI #1 July/August 2011 BFP # 1 - B/G twins - preterm labor/cervical incompetency @ 23w3d FET # 1 March/April 2012 - BFN 5/1/12 FET # 2 July 2012 - BFN 7/24 FET # 3 BFP! EDD 5/15/13 Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers Pregnancy Ticker
  • Hugs!
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  • Awww...hoping things turn out okay!!
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  • Don't blame yourself! Your baby is fortunate to have such a caring mom who is working hard to find answers. Be sure to take care of yourself too. Cry if you need to and find people you can talk to.
    Baby girl born 5/20/13. Figuring it out as we go. :)
  • Please don't blame yourself.  My First LO had to go to a pediatric neurologist and neurosurgeon due to her head size (on the large side) and it was really stressful. For us, everything worked out OK and she didn't need surgery in the end.  I know how scary it can be.  Just know you are doing everything you can right now for her, and I'll be praying everything turns out OK.  Hugs!


    **DD1 - 7/9/98**

    **DS - 11/9/00**

    **DD2 - 4/30/13**

  • kmcd23kmcd23 member
    Big hugs for you! And prayers that everything normalizes soon.
  • KLJ3KLJ3 member
    [[[HUGS]]]. I hope that you're able to get some answers soon and that all turns out well for your baby girl.

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  • Great big hugs coming your way! I can't even begin to imagine how hard all of that must be. I hope it's all precautionary and everything turns out well.
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  • I'm thinking of you and your little girl...I'm so sorry you're going through all of this.
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  • Thank you ladies so much! It's very nice to know I can talk to such encouraging wonderful women! I really appreciate all of you and will keep you all updated on my situation.
  • be888be888 member
    Hugs coming your way! Keep us updated.

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    16 Ch. du Barrage, Lac-Beauport
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  • I'm so sorry you're dealing with so much. I hope everything turns out ok!
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  • ((hugs)) I am so sorry you are going through this. Thoughts and prayers are with you. I hope that everything turns out okay.
    TTC#1 Oct 2010
    DS born May 2013
    TFAS Feb 2016
    EDD 07/29/2017
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  • :::hugs::: I'm so sorry your having to deal with all this. I've been following your posts and I know what a roller coaster its been for you thus far and I'm praying it evens out soon!
  • April!April! member
    I'm sending you hugs and all my best thoughts and prayers to you and your baby. Hang in there, mama!
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    BFP #2 9/5/2012 -- Born 5/20/2013 -- Welcome, rainbow baby!
    BFP #1 1/24/12 -- No HB 2/16/12 -- Misoprostol 3/10/12
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  • Giant hugs!!!
    You are doing everything you can and that is what your little girl needs! You will get through this.
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  • Don't beat yourself up. My mom was on two antiseizure meds while pregnant with me and was really afraid. I was cross eyed as a newborn and she beat herself up for it. But it was just a premature muscle and corrected itself. I was fine. Best of luck to you. But hang in there and don't blame yourself.
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  • (((Hugs))).  It sounds really upsetting but hang in there. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your LO.  



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  • You have my thoughts and prayers. I hope things get better in every way.
    She is here! 5-29-13

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  • Hang in there....you're doing great! Hopefully all is well with baby! Thoughts and prayers!
  • MrsRKJMrsRKJ member
    Believe me, I know how you feel.  LO has a few medical issues, and I know what it's like to be scared, looking for answers and especially to blame yourself.  My thoughts & prayers are with you, and hope everything turns out for the best!  I agree with the PPs, your LO is so lucky to have a mom that will fight for her.  Hang in there, and please don't blame yourself!  Stay strong momma.
    Welcomed our baby boy Henry on March 15, 2013 (7 weeks early!)

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    TTA until 2014


  • Sending hugs. I'm so sorry you and your little one are going through all of this.
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  • Hugs! Where do you live? There is a good chance that you could connect with other moms who will donate their milk directly to you. Maybe breastmilk combined with the formula would help? In the Bay Area we have a Facebook breast feeding page, plus Craigslist and who knows what other resources. Good luck to you and your sweet daughter.
  • wjvwjv member
    I am so sorry that you are having to go through something so stressful.  I am thinking of you and your little girl and praying for you that this is only a precaution and nothing will be found.  This is not your fault.
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  • On the positive side, it seems like you have some proactive doctors that have her and your best interest in mind! And they are acting early.

    None of this is your fault and you are stronger than you think you are! Keep on, mama. You're still the best person for your sweet daughter.
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  • I'm sorry there seem to be more issues than her weight, but getting things checked out cant hurt. DS had a very rough start and will travel a very bumpy road so I'm familiar with all these feelings and please feel free to PM me with any questions or thoughts ( this is why I mentioned getting her heart checked, I don't want anything that happened to him to happen to anyone else when it could have been prevented).  

    Keep being proactive and being her advocate!  My thoughts are with you! 

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