November 2012 Moms

Advice for Nov 13 moms?

Hi ladies, I hope you don't mind me posting here! I was just wondering if any of you had advice for a first time mom due this November.

Did you do anything while prepping for baby that you regret?

Is there anything you didn't do that you regret not doing?

The one thing you had in your hospital bag that you couldn't live without?

"life saving" gadgets, or techniques that got you through those first few weeks/months?

Anything else? Thanks ladies


Re: Advice for Nov 13 moms?

  • I too regret not taking professional newborn pics.

    I packed all sorts of snacks, didn't eat any of them until the day before we got out of the hospital and that was only because we had visitors. The nurses were great about bringing  us whatever we wanted food and snack wise.

    The absolute necessities? Car seat, an outfit for the baby, and something comfy to wear to the car. I had an emergency c-section, luckily I bought lounge pants with a soft waist, otherwise it would have been brutal wearing anything with a tight waist. 

    Also, an empty tote bag so you can take home lots of diapers/blankets/other necessities from the hospital. 

    Lifesaving gadget was the Moby. 

  • imageExcitedMum2B:

     

    Also, an empty tote bag so you can take home lots of diapers/blankets/other necessities from the hospital. 

     

    yes on the extra bag... we had tons of diapers and supplies from the hospital I think he took 3 loads down to the car while we were getting checked out....

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  • I wish I had brought my boppy to the hospital to get us started with bf'ing.  Those hospital pillows are terrible for everything, especially propping up lo to nurse.

    I should have brought pacifiers, too.  The crazy LC's at my hospital have banned them from the premises.

    Also, the LC's prohibit the nurses from even offering formula.  The second night in the hospital was suuuper tough from a nursing perspective.   When it was time to nurse, you know every 45 min. or so, it would end up with the baby screaming at my nipple, me sobbing and DH calling the poor nurse. 

    Finally, the nurse was like, "listen, I'm not allowed to tell you that if you give him an ounce of formula you all can get a little sleep and try again when you're not so frustrated."  So, I asked for the formula, he ate an ounce, slept for the longest he'd slept since right after he was born, and we all tried again when weren't so frustrated.  It totally was not a big deal and in no way scarred him for life, or ruined our breastfeeding.  Neither did the paci, and our pedi said she thinks everyone should use pacis with newborns bc they reduce the risk of SIDS. 

    I finally did pull the plug on nursing and ended up pumping for about 6mo.  So, come on back if you have questions about that some day. 

    "A new baby is like the beginning of all things--wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities."


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  • Gear-wise, (I'm just full of wisdom today, right?) we couldn't have made it through the first bit without the Rock-n-play and Aden+Anais blankets (they're really worth the $). 

    ETA:  No one ever told me that plain old fashioned blue Dawn dish soap would be so useful.  It really gets greasy breastmilk residue off of bottles and what not, and doesn't leave an aftertaste because it rinses so clean.  Also, it's great to pre-treat breastmilk poop stains before you launder (and wash in cold water). 

    "A new baby is like the beginning of all things--wonder, hope, a dream of possibilities."


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  • imagekiraliz2:

    Here is what I regret, personally:

    Not spending enough skin to skin time with my newborn, both in the hospital and at home. I wish I had limited visitors and just spent time with my baby. I would have taken my Moby to the hospital so I could have worn LO in the hospital bed.  I also wish I had let people help me more.

    Life saving gadget was my Moby. 

    You don't need much at the hospital, but I liked having my own robe.

    If you haven't already, watch (or read) The Happiest Baby on the Block

    I agree on the skin to skin and baby time... tons of time for visitors later.... its time to focus on baby

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  • Wow, thank you ladies. Several of these things are things that hadn't even crossed my mind! I really, really appreciate the advice.

    So much to learn........ 

    Congrats to all of you on your Nov '12 babies!


  • White noise app!!!

    And what everyone else said.

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  • I couldn't live without my Boppy, bathrobe and blanket from home.  I hate the hospital blankets!  My SO also enjoyed having a comfy warm familiar blanket to sleep with on his cot :)

     I was a second time mom, but had to have an emergency c-section so I wasn't prepared for that!  I lived in sweats (brought yoga pants, but they hurt my incision) and tanks in the hospital.  I thankfully brought my blow dryer, makeup and toiletries - 4 days there was draining and it was nice to feel a bit normal esp when we had visitors.

    I regret not buying a Rock & Play prior to her arrival.  After 4 weeks of no sleep, we ran out one morning and got it as a last resort. She started sleeping through the night @ 6 weeks and spent most nights in it until about 5 months old.  A life saver!  Also couldn't live without gas drops.

    Bring baby blankets to the hospital. I didn't like the scratchy, washed a million times ones that they provided.  I'm also not a fan of their hats or onesies so I had gowns for her in the bag. It helped as I had to be there 4 days and we had a lot of visitors (pics). 

    I started pumping the second week and SO would give her a bottle so I could sleep.  I know it's not "recommended" - but as I said this was my second and we didn't have issues with either baby using a pacie or bottles.  Both BF like champs and I was SO grateful for the extra sleep and knowing she would eat if I wasn't around for some reason. 

     Oh, and don't open diapers until you use them!  I received a bunch from family, and opened them to put away in her diaper stacker, bins, etc.  Before I knew it, she would grow out of a size and they were not returnable!  She also had reactions to the Target & Luvs brand so those packages had to be donated.  I bought big boxes in preparation yet couldn't use them....

    Good luck! 

  • To elaborate:

    My most favorite things were also the rock and play, aiden and Anais blankets, and the nosefrida.

    In the hospital, I had cheap target lounge pants and also a cheap night shirt. I got lanolin on everything, which stains, so beware if you use it. I didn't do anything special during delivery. Except, you know, deliver my child. We brought a horrible cat picture to be funny, but I kind of lost my sense of humor during transition.

    If you're planning to nurse, I LIVED in ribbed cotton tanks from the Gap and skipped a bra for a long time. They were easy to nurse in, a little supportive, and didn't feel like burning sandpaper on my nips.

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  • Sorry, thought of something else!  If you see a great sale or have a shower, stock up on things for older babies.  I bought a high chair, exercauser, toys and 6-9 month onesies (can be worn year round, they are currently her summer wardrobe!), teethers, etc while I was pregnant.  It was beyond great to have these things ahead of time.  We didn't have to blow a ton of money when the time came, and we got really good deals while I was pregnant using sales, coupons, etc.  I started using the high chair around 4.5 months - time really does fly and before you know it you will need these things!  

    It was awesome to have drawers full of bigger clothing too, sleepers especially.  Being a winter baby, we didn't go out much at all so she wore them 24/7.  

  • What everyone said.

    Also, getting the diapers and stuff, but don't forget all the aftercare stuff for mom! The pads, sprays, peri bottle, creams. Anything and everything.

    Never be afraid to ask for help when you need it.

    I got the newborn pics in the hospital. So glad I did. I love looking at them.

    You will feel much better in your own clothes.

     




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  • imagebeane4018:
    Two more things, since you asked.. 1. Maybe this is because my pregnancy/labor delivery was relatively easy, but I wish I'd spent more time worrying/learning about what to do once the kid arrives and less time on the giving birth process. 2. I wish I'd know what a racket daycare enrollment is and that you can't just put your name on a waiting list and expect to be called when there's an opening.

     

    HOLY COW YEEESSS TO  BOTH OF THESE

  • Read the Happiest Baby on the Block BEFORE LO's birth, not at 12 am as you hold your baby because you have no idea what to do.  Try not to let LO  get overtired; that's when mine would scream like there's no tomorrow.  I waited til 5 mos to CIO; probably should have done it sooner...would have saved me a lot of grief!
  • when you get the sleep and plays... get the zip up ones (childrens place or gerber I think)  daddy got frustrated with the little snaps and his big ol fingers ... nothing worse than a frustrated daddy
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  • Thanks mamas!! It's been a few years and you reminded me of many things I had forgotten!!
    Ugh lanolin stains on my good nursing clothes ::mobile mad face::
  • My bathrobe and yoga pants were pretty much all I wore for my five night stay in the hospital.

    FFIL paid for the hospital newborn photo session, and I am so, so glad that he did! We brought a couple different outfits in different sizes for DS to wear. I do wish I had brought snacks with me. I completely lost my appetite after DS was born, so I couldn't eat any of the hospital food. I think I would have been able to eat smaller snacks though.

    A shower chair at home was a lifesaver the first couple weeks at home. It made showering SO much easier. FI's sister also went grocery shopping for us while I was in the hospital. If you can, do freezer meals or stock up on healthy snacks beforehand.

    Oh, and my main advice is do what you need to survive those first few weeks or months. It only matters what's best for you and your family. And yeah, scary staying at home 24 7 with this tiny stranger that completely relies on you. If you have a chance to take a break, even more a few minutes, do it!
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  • imagekiraliz2:
    imageGargita:
    White noise app!!!

    And what everyone else said.


    Oh HELL yes. Yes yes yes.

    Yes!!! So much good advice here! And the skin to skin is so important. I would've spent more time focused on that and BFing
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  • You ladies are fantastic! Thank you SO MUCH for the words of wisdom. Seriously, thank you for taking a minute to help us out :)

  • I agree with what everyone here has mentioned. Especially buying things that you will use when baby is older. My DH is awesome at research and getting the best deals with what coupons we had and what sales were going on. We bought all of our big merchandise, high chair, exersaucer, rock n play, johnny jump up, activity mat, way early on.

    Also, enjoy the newborn phase! I know you will wish it away at 2 am but believe us when we say it goes extremely fast!

    Good luck and I think I speak for all of us when I say to contact this board anytime you have questions or just need to talk to someone!
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  • Did you do anything while prepping for baby that you regret?    There's really nothing that I regret.  I did not know the gender of our baby in advance so I didn't decorate the nursery or really do much prep in advance.

    Is there anything you didn't do that you regret not doing?  No.

    The one thing you had in your hospital bag that you couldn't live without? I brought several magazines.  I had a pretty long hospital experience (36 hours of labor) so I enjoyed having some magazines to read.  I remember wearing socks for the first several hours when I would walk the hallways.

    "life saving" gadgets, or techniques that got you through those first few weeks/months?  I think the biggest gadget I used during my maternity leave was my baby carrier.  LO didn't like her swing and always needed to be held.  I really relied on my carrier to get things done.  In terms of techniques, I am a breastfeeding mom.  I learned to nurse on demand- whenever LO wanted to.  I also tried to pump after she nursed to try to build a supply.

    Other advice- Be flexible!!  Learn to live on very little sleep.  I didn't really take LO out of the house much until the spring.  My advice would be to not stop living your life just because you have a baby.  Take your baby shopping or wherever you want to go!

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  • OK, something else I forgot!  I absolutely cannot live without - then and now - disposable puppy pads (for diaper changes)!  Sounds silly and weird but I read it on another board pre-baby and got some for the heck of it.  I cut them up so one bag lasts a while. You will need them as baby seems to like to pee as soon as the diaper is off!  Saved me a ton of laundry & aggravation.  I use them on top of her changing pad and also carry in the diaper bag for on the go changes.  They sell baby ones, but for 3 times the cost.
  • Did you do anything while prepping for baby that you regret? I regret working too hard to paint the nursery around 20 weeks. I was climbing ladders, laying down plastic on the floors, taping the edges of the doors and windows...it didn't feel like it at the time, but the next couple of days I had horrible back pain and I couldn't go anywhere. I really over-did it and learned that I need to take it easy and try not to do so much at that stage in the pregnancy.

    Is there anything you didn't do that you regret not doing? Newborn photos. I really regret not getting them.

    The one thing you had in your hospital bag that you couldn't live without? The hospital provided pretty much everything we needed; I definitely overpacked. I was very greatful for my fuzzy slippers and nice robe and pajamas (with a nursing top) DH gave me.

    "life saving" gadgets, or techniques that got you through those first few weeks/months? The rock 'n play was a surprise hit for months. He also loved his bouncer and swing. Oh, and I love the nightlight in the nursery...it's just a little thing, but it was really nice for getting up in the MOTN. It projects an image on the ceiling and provides just the right amount of light, so I never had to turn on a lamp. Swaddling really helped him sleep (I used swaddleme wraps and they were great).

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  • imagecredcat7:
    when you get the sleep and plays... get the zip up ones (childrens place or gerber I think)  daddy got frustrated with the little snaps and his big ol fingers ... nothing worse than a frustrated daddy

    I've gotta disagree on this one.

    DH and I hated the zip ones.  The zipper obviously only goes down one leg. If you've got a scrunched up or squirmy baby, it's really tough to get the leg out of the non-zip side.

    We definitely preferred the snap ones that go down both legs. Easier access especially for MOTN poops. And DH doesn't have dainty fingers and he had no problem.  

    It's a personal preference... 

  • imageshella923:
    Read the Happiest Baby on the Block BEFORE LO's birth, not at 12 am as you hold your baby because you have no idea what to do.  Try not to let LO  get overtired; that's when mine would scream like there's no tomorrow.  I waited til 5 mos to CIO; probably should have done it sooner...would have saved me a lot of grief!

     

    please don't recommend CIO before 6 months.  

  • imageSurpriseAt39:

    imagecredcat7:
    when you get the sleep and plays... get the zip up ones (childrens place or gerber I think)  daddy got frustrated with the little snaps and his big ol fingers ... nothing worse than a frustrated daddy

    I've gotta disagree on this one.

    DH and I hated the zip ones.  The zipper obviously only goes down one leg. If you've got a scrunched up or squirmy baby, it's really tough to get the leg out of the non-zip side.

    We definitely preferred the snap ones that go down both legs. Easier access especially for MOTN poops. And DH doesn't have dainty fingers and he had no problem.  

    It's a personal preference... 

     

    i have to agree with the snaps but when DS was tiny we always had him in a nightgown with socks under his swaddle.  Very easy access and still comfy for him. I loved the halo sleepsack/swaddle in fleece to keep him warm at night. 

  • imageMomtobe2912:

    I hate our SnugRide 35 carseat by Graco.  It is wider than standard so it doesn't fit in the highchair slings at restaurants, some shopping cars, and barely fits in other shopping carts (which it takes up about 90% of the space in).  The chest straps are way too small to ever fit him to the 35 lb or 32" mark.  It really is a flop of a seat even if it is one of the safest on the market.  I wished I had bought the Britax Chaperone instead but it was out of stock everywhere when we needed one.  My second choice would have been the Graco Snugride 32 or even 22.  Those two were significantly less cost, and we probably wont use this one over that anyway.

     

    On page 23? 24? of your manual it has instructions on how to let out the straps for a larger baby... Did you do this and it still is way small?  It comes with the straps set on a loop for small babies(I'm guessing so they are not excessively long) but you can switch it to being at the end of the strap and have a little more to work with.  I apologize if this is redundant info. 

  • Agree with so many PPs!

    No regrets on anything we did prepping for baby.  I researched everything a ton and really didn't buy anything we didn't use (but we were very minimalist).

    Agree with others who regret not having newborn pics (those first few days were just so overwhelming).  And I wish I had limited visitors and stuck up for myself and my baby.  When you become a mom, you instantly have a new role in your family, and I still struggle with setting limits with my in-laws and parents.  

    People wanted to help me by holding the baby so I could do housework.  I really needed people to do housework so I could cuddle with the baby!  Next time, I'd tell people in advance and be honest about what is helpful.

    As for the hospital bag -- I packed yoga pants, and nursing cami, a wrap cardigan, and a nice robe.  Would have packed two of all of those things.  I felt SO much better when I showered and got out of the hospital gown.

    Would suggest stocking up on sanitary pads, nursing pads, etc.  So embarrassing to send other people out for them!

    I would love to spring for a doula next time.  My husband was great, but needed rest and slept through the scariest part of my labor!  

     I would have brought my Boppy to the hospital.  I learned to position the baby on the pillows there and then had to figure out the Boppy at home.  

     Best things for the first few weeks: the Woombie, the bouncer chair, the Rock N Play, a nursing cover, a big yoga ball (best way to calm the baby -- bouncing on it with him in my arms), a good cover for the car-seat, the Boppy changing pad liners, the Baby K'Tan. 

     

     

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  • Sin to skin.  LO was in the NICU on a separate floor with orders to eat every 3 hours.  15 minutes to get through security, 1 hour trying to feed and suppliment, and another 15 to get back to our room and get what sleep we could before starting all over again.  We didn't get to just sit and chill with her.

     When you get home use a white noise machine or iPod and play the same noise/song EVERY time you are in the process of putting baby down for the night.  Then when LO gets older, you dim the lights, put on the same song/noise and I triggers to baby that its bedtime.  Hopefully, cuts down on fighting bedtime.

    Be ready for the mood swings.  I heard so much about PP depression and was pretty sure I wouldn't have a problem with that, but the crazy mood swings were the worst!!!  Pity b/s I hurt, sleep deprived, happy b/s I was FINALLY a mom, scared to death the first time I accidentally scratched, bumped, or made baby cry, grateful that I could pump and share the feeding responsibilities, frustrated that I had BF problems, crying and having NOOO idea why.  It seemed like it never ended and no one talks about that part.  Just the pregnancy mood swings (which I never had) and PP depression. 

  • I don't regret anything. It is my fourth though so I had done it before.

    I did a few things I was really glad about, I bought a really warm bathrobe for when I got home and I bought a really heavy down comforter. I just snuggled up in my bathrobe and under my warm comforter with the baby during my maternity leave. It was awesome.

    I also made these pads soaked in witch hazel and then froze them for my bum and they felt so good. Do that!

    I had tons of food and pre made food for the rest of my family that my husband could make. That was really helpful if you have other children.

    The best thing I did for myself was really being in good shape when I got pregnant, I kept lifting weights while pregnant and I shaped back up the quickest I ever have after the baby because of that. I followed a book call the "New Rules of Lifting" even while pregnant, just dialed down the intensity and it was a life saver for my body. Do not start this lifting program while pregnant, wait if you are not active now, but start it after this baby in prep for the next one. You will not regret it. There is a sister book to this one called "The new rules of lifting for women" that is a great place to start.

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