Not a good day for mistakes

JennyLynne · July 2013

I know I've been absent lately, but I'm so upset right now and I'm home alone. I feel like I can't breathe. (Quick background, my mom has been dating the guy she's with for like 5 years. He has a stepdaughter, also named Jenny, from his previous marriage and she's in her 40s. She just had a baby about 5/6 months ago)

So my mom is babysitting the baby--I had talked about going to her house tonight, but she even said to me, "I'm babysitting [baby]--I don't want it to be too hard on you. It's even hard on me sometimes." Turns out, I'm having a terrible last few days, so I stayed home. So I'm sitting here trying to find articles on TTCAL and grief out on the web and I get a picture of [baby] and my mom--he's holding a Graham cracker. Caption says, "Grahams with Grams!"

My stomach hits the floor. I had no idea that my mom was referring to herself as Grandma with her boyfriend's stepdaughter's kid. Astrid was to be her first grandchild. It was like getting punched in the gut. Follow up text comes in right after that says, "He just ate peas and fruit--do you want me to give him his bottle tonight too?" At this point I'm feeling sick. These are texts that I should be getting about my baby.

I just simply replied, "Wrong Jenny." She replied right away and says, "I am so sorry." I then turn off my phone. I don't know what to do. I know it was a mistake, but I am so incredibly upset right now. She just tried to skype me as well.

jess123456 · July 2013

Big hugs to you. That's so hard. It stinks to have that all shoved in your face and I can definetely relate to that as my sister has a little girl and my parents are completely obssessed with her. I love my neice of course but it doesn't change the fact that it is so damn hard to see them with her. Your child will always be her first grandchild and that will never change. I hope tomorrow is a much better day for you.

Bayberry12 · July 2013

Oh wow, that is tough. I am so sorry you have to deal with that. Hugs to you.

JennyLynne · July 2013

Thank you, thank you, thank you ladies--I needed someone to tell me I'm not crazy. Someone that understands. Just trying to decide if I should call my mom back now or not. I really don't want to right now, but I don't want her to go to bed with guilt.

Noethola · July 2013

I am so very sorry, what an incredibly hard day.

OSUWifey09 · July 2013

SIGGY

My stomach hit the floor for you; you aren't crazy. I would be really upset by that, too. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that; I hope tomorrow is better. Sending big hugs.

angelsnight · July 2013

Oh Jenny I'm so sorry! That had to be so hard, especially hearing that your mom is referring to herself as grams. I know this probably doesn't help you much because it's not in the way you wanted it to be, or the way it should be, but Astrid IS her first granddaughter. But I totally know what you mean, I would be so hurt by her going by grandma, but also for sending the pics to you despite it being an accident. Big hugs!

bunnybun4 · July 2013

I know exactly how your feel...my SIL had twins a month before my EDD...somedays I can totally take it and some days it feels like they are shoving a knife into my stomach and twisting it whenever my in laws make a comment about the twins. In a way I feel betrayal...even though I know they aren't trying to do that to me. All of this sucks so bad...I hate that we have to deal with these things so soon after our losses.

((HUGS))

shandorfml2 · July 2013

I am so sorry...that's so yucky.

tuscanbride2007 · July 2013

Oh my goodness! I am so sorry.

((HUGS))

JennyLynne · July 2013

Thanks again ladies--I did some tapping on the situation last night and feel less anxiety over it. But I'm still a little mad even though I know it was an accident. I haven't called her/texted her yet. Just still need space I guess. Thanks for all the e-hugs!

JessicaG220 · July 2013

Ugh. I am so sorry you have to deal with this on top of your loss. I hope things get easier and your mom realizes how hard this is for you. Lots of hugs to you!!!

Not a good day for mistakes

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