Working moms!

teacupkat · June 2013

Hello! I am a FTM due in late December. I currently work full time and I am planning to continue after baby is born. I am hoping I am posting this in the right spot. I want to know how other moms do it or are adjusting to it.
My husband and I got into this conversation today. It began to give me some anxiety about what happens in 6 months. I will get maternity leave from my job, maybe 3 monthsstill in discussion. After that, baby needs to go to daycare. I am beginning to get myself all worked up. Already the idea of leaving my child with someone else freaks me out, especially at a young age. My husband talks about working opposite schedules and not really seeing each other, which this hormonal pregnant lady does not want to hear right now.
How do other moms get through this transition and how well has it been going? Any opinions or advice is welcome.
I need to work, staying at home really isn't an option.

PSUBecky23 · June 2013

teacupkat:
Hello! I am a FTM due in late December. I currently work full time and I am planning to continue after baby is born. I am hoping I am posting this in the right spot. I want to know how other moms do it or are adjusting to it.
My husband and I got into this conversation today. It began to give me some anxiety about what happens in 6 months. I will get maternity leave from my job, maybe 3 monthsstill in discussion. After that, baby needs to go to daycare. I am beginning to get myself all worked up. Already the idea of leaving my child with someone else freaks me out, especially at a young age. My husband talks about working opposite schedules and not really seeing each other, which this hormonal pregnant lady does not want to hear right now.
How do other moms get through this transition and how well has it been going? Any opinions or advice is welcome.
I need to work, staying at home really isn't an option.

Even working opposite schedules doesn't always work. Whoever works nights needs to sleep, right? My husband works nights and my daughter is in daycare. Start touring daycares now. It's not too early. And when it comes time, have your husband do drop offs and you do pick ups. It's hard at first, but you and your baby will get through it.

katiefox87 · June 2013

I am set to go back to work next Monday, July 8th and I will be taking my 8 week old to daycare. I will work full-time and my office is 35 minutes away from my home. I am nervous about going back, and I know that it is going to be hard for the first couple of weeks, but after that, I feel like we will get into a routine and everything will work out. I have confidence that the employees at the daycare are fully capable of handling my son, they probably have more experience than me! My niece attends this daycare and I have only heard wonderful things about it. My MIL lives very close and will help pick my son up a couple days a week. I feel as though now that I will not be around my son 24/7 like I have been since May 14, it will help me appreciate the time that we have together more. Now, I feed him and put him in a swing or crib because I'm so tired that sometimes I don't feel like holding him, but I feel as though when I go back to work I will really appreciate that time with my son. One thing I miss about working is my routine, these past weeks have been strange since I am out of a routine, so I am looking forward to getting back to my routine. I hope this helps!

Liz629 · June 2013

I went back to work after 8 weeks, but there wasn't a spot in our daycare until LO was 11 weeks. Fortunately, my sister is a teach and was able to come stay with him for 2 weeks and then we went on vacation for a week. I really think that leaving him with someone that I knew first made the transition to daycare easier. It was like going in two phases, phase 1 of getting used to not being with him all day long and then phase 2 of leaving him at daycare. Is there someone that you can have watch him for the first week and then go on to day care? Also, our daycare has an open door policy. I can drop in anytime that I want. I recommend touring daycares ASAP and find one that you feel comfortable with.

teacupkat · June 2013

Thanks everyone for all the great responses. There is actually a daycare in my work building and I see them pushing babies around all the time. I'm hoping I can go there and that way check in on the baby when I can. This is my ultimate goal. My mother might be able to take a week off once I return to work, but she also works. I have some figuring out to do and touring. I just wanted some comforting words from other working moms. I truly appreciate it!

rlyttle · June 2013

I went back to work when DS was 4 months old. I had to go back to work, so I just looked at it like I was lucky to have been able to stay home with him for 4 months. He was holding his head up, almost sitting up, and on a good schedule. I felt like it was time. I love, love, LOVE his babysitter. He goes to an in-home daycare. There is only 4 kids and he LOVES it there, always has. It just became a new way of life and it made me appreciate my time with DS more than I did being home with him all the time. It all works out. Just make sure you find someone you trust to watch your child.

demmie326 · June 2013

We tried daycare with DS but we never really felt comfortable leaving him and it was super expensive. I quit my full time job and work part time a couple of evenings a week and one day on the weekend so DH watches the kids when I am at work. Our arrangement definitely has its upsides....I am making more working part time not having to pay for daycare, the kids are in all sorts of activities and our kids love having time with each of us. The downside is that it leaves very little time for us to relax as individuals, as a couple, and as a family. Careful planning has made it easier but it can be tough. Best of luck to you!

doctabroccoli · June 2013

katiefox87:
I am set to go back to work next Monday, July 8th and I will be taking my 8 week old to daycare. I will work full-time and my office is 35 minutes away from my home. I am nervous about going back, and I know that it is going to be hard for the first couple of weeks, but after that, I feel like we will get into a routine and everything will work out. I have confidence that the employees at the daycare are fully capable of handling my son, they probably have more experience than me! My niece attends this daycare and I have only heard wonderful things about it. My MIL lives very close and will help pick my son up a couple days a week. I feel as though now that I will not be around my son 24/7 like I have been since May 14, it will help me appreciate the time that we have together more. Now, I feed him and put him in a swing or crib because I'm so tired that sometimes I don't feel like holding him, but I feel as though when I go back to work I will really appreciate that time with my son. One thing I miss about working is my routine, these past weeks have been strange since I am out of a routine, so I am looking forward to getting back to my routine. I hope this helps!

i could've written this post! I've loved having this time with my daughter, but being a SAHM is not for me. One thing I am looking forward to is daycare hopefully teaching her to sleep in a crib!

lsleeper22 · June 2013

My son will be 13 weeks on Wednesday and I've been back at work since the 3rd of June. I could have stayed off another three weeks, but financially it was best for us if I returned. While I was pregnant I also hated the idea of putting him in childcare so young, but I was fortunate enough to have a day care recommended to us where a close friend brings their daughter. Finding a place you can really trust is key. I went back full time and it's not so bad once you adjust to it. Also, it certainly makes that time you do have together that much more precious.

mommatotwo2 · June 2013

rcantor:
teacupkat:
Hello! I am a FTM due in late December. I currently work full time and I am planning to continue after baby is born. I am hoping I am posting this in the right spot. I want to know how other moms do it or are adjusting to it. My husband and I got into this conversation today. It began to give me some anxiety about what happens in 6 months. I will get maternity leave from my job, maybe 3 monthsstill in discussion. After that, baby needs to go to daycare. I am beginning to get myself all worked up. Already the idea of leaving my child with someone else freaks me out, especially at a young age. My husband talks about working opposite schedules and not really seeing each other, which this hormonal pregnant lady does not want to hear right now. How do other moms get through this transition and how well has it been going? Any opinions or advice is welcome. I need to work, staying at home really isn't an option.
Even working opposite schedules doesn't always work. Whoever works nights needs to sleep, right? My husband works nights and my daughter is in daycare. Start touring daycares now. It's not too early. And when it comes time, have your husband do drop offs and you do pick ups. It's hard at first, but you and your baby will get through it.

This, I don't mean to be a debbie downer, but working opposite shifts to avoid daycare only works so long. Trying to stay awake until your DH gets home to go to sleep is agony. I tried this and it was awful. I was not the mommy I needed to be for my DD. Her needs were met, but I was grumpy and absolutely no fun. When DH would get home at 6 pm, I literally had to lay down immediately to get 4 hours of sleep before I had to get ready for my 11 pm shift. I would not recommend this.

OhSewCrafty · June 2013

I think I'm in the minority here, but I was excited to go back to work. I was confident in my child care research and choice and was looking forward to getting back to a normal routine. Don't get me wrong, I loved staying home with my kids (I was home for 3 months each time) and love my evenings and weekends with them, but I also love my job and getting out during the day. My job is part of who I am and being a SAHM just isn't for me. :-)

FWIW, my son LOVES daycare (DD will start in August) and misses it when we pull him for the summer (my husband is a teacher and is home all summer). He learns so much, makes friends, and has a lot of fun.

Don't stress about it -- especially so early in the game. Good luck!

FabulousMrs.P · July 2013

I just popped in from the 12 month board, but I just wanted to let you know I was the same way. The thought of someone else taking care of my child was scary when I was pregnant. The first day when I dropped her off, I cried on my way to work...and when I picked her up I realized she was just fine. Now, it's just part of her and my routine. Since my DD is any only child, I love that she gets to spend time with her peers and learn things like sharing with others, etc. She also really loves playing with the other kids.

And even though she is in daycare, trust me, she is still a momma's girl! She is always giving me hugs and kisses! She still only want momma when she isn't feeling well. So, don't worry that you won't have that special bond with your baby. Remember it is the quality of time you spend with them, not the quantity.

teacupkat · July 2013

Once again, thanks so much to everyone who has written back. It really makes me not so fearful. I just want to say, when I said oppsosite schedules, i should have explained better, it is more like my husband would take off during the week while I worked Monday thru Friday, and I would have my weekend to take care of baby. That way we would only need daycare 3 out of 5 days. My husband owns his own business so he can create his own working schedule. I'd still see my husband at night, but I would miss a whole day or two together like we have now on the weekend.
I'm sure once I start looking into daycares and taking a tour, my fears may diminish. I just hope we can make it work!

FabulousMrs.P · July 2013

Also, I just wanted to let you know that there are a lot of different types of daycare out there. Home day cares, day care centers, etc. Check them all out and see what you feel the most comfortable with. There are a lot of options!

I ended up going with a really nice lady's home day care and she is like another grandmother to her...treats DD just like she was her own grandchild.

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