I'm about to lose it

kleigh926 · June 2013

DD will. not. nap. Like, hardly at all. She went from taking great naps during the day and being an overall happy, pleasant baby to taking a couple half hour naps a day and yelling/screaming/being a mess during almost the entire day. I know she's tired. She looks and sounds tired. But she wakes up after 20-30 minutes every time I put her down for a nap. Getting her to go back to sleep pretty much never works. Occasionally if I pick her up and rock her for another 5-10 minutes, she'll fall back asleep, but she always wakes up again very soon.

I'm just wondering if anyone has any advice/experience with this, because I can't go another week listening to a screaming baby all day and getting nothing done. I would not be opposed to a modified CIO method, but I don't really know how to go about that with naps. She doesn't really have problems sleeping at night, it's just during the day. Would putting her down awake and "teaching" her to fall asleep herself, instead of rocking her to sleep every time possibly help?

Christee25 · June 2013

This is basically the story of my life for the last 6 to 7 weeks. At first I thought it was a growth spurt, and so we let it ride for awhile. It is still happening on a daily basis. We just hold him or cosleep because putting him down during the day is to much. I have DS about 18 to 20 hours a day by myself and so I dont have any energy to keep trying the swing or crib. I dont have any great advice, but you're certainly not alone.

kelly321 · June 2013

With DD1 (who had many other issues), naps were a problem from the day we brought her home from the hospital. She would only sleep 5 to occasionally max. 20 min in the crib / playpen. In my arms, she would sleep 2-3 hours 2 times / day and another hour in the evening. Because I had the luxury of being a SAHM, it was worth it to me to just chill on the couch watching TV and reading books while she slept.

I did that for 7 months, occasionally trying to let her sleep somewhere else, but it wasn't until she was 7 months old that Ferber's method worked for naps in her crib (for nighttime sleep it worked at about 6 months). 7 months of DD1 napping in our arms 3x / day. I just thought of it as forced relaxation time.

DD2 napped great but has now also started to only nap for 20ish min. I'm interested to see what others say because I don't know what to do this time around. Since I've got DD1 as well, I can't hold DD2 for naps.

jkuhmann · June 2013

Does she wake up and cry/scream or just chat to herself and move around in her crib? As long as DS isn't full-out crying, I'll let him stay in the PNP bassinet and hang out as long as he wants. I think that helped teach him to put himself back to sleep. If he cries, I'll wait a minute and then go get him. Sometimes he'll get his thumb in his mouth and calm himself down.

wholenewworld · June 2013

I was just about to write basically the same post. I am getting so overwhelmed with all the inconsolable crying and refusal to take naps anywhere but on me. DS was a great little baby, but has turned into a monster recently. I don't think it's a growth spurt, because its been weeks now. I wasn't expecting this age to be the fussy age, I thought we were past that. Ugh.

pitterpatter129 · June 2013

Well, we can go insane together. I have no suggestions; DS1 wasn't like this.

mediaperuana · June 2013

no advice, i'm sorry to say, but i'm right there with you. i feel like i spend my entire life trying to make this baby sleep--he's yawning, he's rubbing his eyes, but the minute i try to put him to sleep, he's fighting me. once i get him to sleep, he's back up in 30 minutes or less. he gets progressively grumpier, fussier, and harder to put to sleep throughout the day, and if i'm not trying to make him nap, i'm trying to entertain him so he won't fuss/cry. i've tried shorter wake periods, longer wake periods; sleeping in the swing, crib, pnp, bouncy seat; rocking to sleep, putting down drowsy, nursing to sleep--nothing seems to make a difference, he fights them all and wakes up after 20-30 mins.

kleigh926 · June 2013

jkuhmann:
Does she wake up and cry/scream or just chat to herself and move around in her crib? As long as DS isn't full-out crying, I'll let him stay in the PNP bassinet and hang out as long as he wants. I think that helped teach him to put himself back to sleep. If he cries, I'll wait a minute and then go get him. Sometimes he'll get his thumb in his mouth and calm himself down.

She usually starts off just babbling/squealing and I let her go, but after a few minutes it turns into crying. And then it seems like she's too worked up and awake to go back to sleep at that time.

My new method that I'm going to try is eliminating rocking her to sleep. I do it before every nap and bedtime, and I think she is associating that too much with sleep and can't fall back asleep herself when she wakes up in her crib. I'm going to sit quietly with her and get her drowsy, then put her down DBA and try a modified Ferber-type thing if/when she cries.

Thanks everyone for letting me know I'm not alone, that helps!

DublinMama · June 2013

I'm right there with you, sister. DS has always napped for 30 minutes, but the past two days cannot cope with it. He gets cranky after being up for 45 minutes, where at least before we could usually make it to 90 or so. So, what I've done the last two days is let him take one good nap on me, which has happened to be around 1:00 each day. He naps almost two hours sleeping on me, but that is NOT something I want to make a habit out of at 4 months old. Then an hour later, I'll put him down again and see if it works. I hate the short wake times because it feels like all I've been doing is trying to get this kid to sleep all day, but I hate the incessant fussiness and screaming way more. I'll probably put him to bed after only an hour and fifteen minutes of wake time tonight. I'm hoping to catch him up on some sleep, and then have my relatively easy boy back tomorrow

Drea926 · June 2013

I'm in the same boat! DS has done the short nap thing since about 2 months old. He used to give at least one long one in there (with definite soothing from me - multiple times) but a few days this week have been all short - it isn't pretty. Luckily he took a long one today - so I'm sure there's an end point for you Kleigh!

Drea926 · June 2013

jkuhmann:
Does she wake up and cry/scream or just chat to herself and move around in her crib? As long as DS isn't full-out crying, I'll let him stay in the PNP bassinet and hang out as long as he wants. I think that helped teach him to put himself back to sleep. If he cries, I'll wait a minute and then go get him. Sometimes he'll get his thumb in his mouth and calm himself down.

I should start doing this! He usually wakes up chatting and I go in and get him assuming he is "up"...I wonder if I should leave him in there for a bit...

theimpossibleastronaut · June 2013

I have no advice. DD is a crappy napper. However the book we're using for sleep training is Sleeping Through the Night by Jodi Mindell. It has advice on naps, but we are trying to firm up her nighttime routine before tackling naps. Her nighttime method is working for us so thought I would mention the book for you.

kleigh926 · June 2013

DC2London:
kelly321:
With DD1 (who had many other issues), naps were a problem from the day we brought her home from the hospital. She would only sleep 5 to occasionally max. 20 min in the crib / playpen. In my arms, she would sleep 2-3 hours 2 times / day and another hour in the evening. Because I had the luxury of being a SAHM, it was worth it to me to just chill on the couch watching TV and reading books while she slept.
I did that for 7 months, occasionally trying to let her sleep somewhere else, but it wasn't until she was 7 months old that Ferber's method worked for naps in her crib (for nighttime sleep it worked at about 6 months). 7 months of DD1 napping in our arms 3x / day. I just thought of it as forced relaxation time.
DD2 napped great but has now also started to only nap for 20ish min. I'm interested to see what others say because I don't know what to do this time around. Since I've got DD1 as well, I can't hold DD2 for naps.
I could have written this.  I got a lot of reading done while "napping" with DS1, but my house was a mess.
I wish I had some sage advice, but the fact is, I don't.  I'm totally lost.  DS2 is a brilliant sleeper--as long as he is touching me.  He can be lying beside me, in my lap, in my arms, but he has to be with me.  He's simply too heavy to wear 2 hours at a time several times a day.  I need to find a way to get him to sleep on his own, but I don't believe in sleep coaching prior to 6 months (just for me, personally, I can't do it--if you want to do it at 4 months then more power to you!) so.....here we are.   

I could never let her cry for any more than 5 minutes at a time while she's this young, and even that would really be pushing it. I just put her down pretty much awake. The first time she cried for 30 seconds before I went in to soothe. The second time it was about a minute. And then she went to sleep! It's only been like 15 minutes though so I don't wanna get too excited yet, haha.
I hope we can all get our babies to sleep better soon!

Rosebean · June 2013

Our struggle was our LO liked to be rocked to sleep for all sleeps... But at night we could eventually transfer him to his crib.

Like your LO, the naps were crappy, short and he was very grumpy. He got little play time in and I strongly felt he needed a better sleep association routine to get him better sleep.

We implemented Ferber last week and have seen a completely different baby. He sleeps now for 30 minutes, but will now have a long midday nap that can run about 1 to 2 hours long. And with that nice long nap, he is much more content between his cat naps. He also falls asleep faster on his own and if we are out of the home, we can convince him to nap in other places as long as it is quiet. Today he napped in my arms at a friends house, but fell asleep peacefully compared to the last time.

Before you commit to your chosen method, I recommend reading the book fully, or at least the chapters that really pertain to your situation. It gives you a better understanding of what to expect.

khaze · June 2013

I really don't have any advice for you, I just wanted to tell you that you basically explained my life right now and that I too am on the verge of losing it. I enjoyed reading what other ladies had to say, I'm up for trying anything at this point.

twirlyjack73 · June 2013

Screw the rocking, that is how you get an addict. Yes DBA starting now is perfect, i started even a few weeks ago. Also try putting baby to sleep within 2 hours of last wake. That way they won't get overtired. GL hugs

wifeofadam · June 2013

Lately if DD2 is really overtired I either swing her outside on the baby swing on our swingset or wear her around the house for a while. One of those two things will work for me. Or, if all else fails, I lie down with her and nurse her to sleep.

But, my DD still isn't napping in her crib. I'm not worrying about that until she is at least 6 months because I know this wakeful stage takes a while to work itself out. If you want your baby napping routinely in her crib through this period, you will probably have to do training. Just remember you'll probably have to do it again in a few months when she is teething and then again during the 10-11 month separation anxiety phase.

I'm about to lose it

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