Natural Birth
kmbrlyann22
member
epi or no?
kmbrlyann22
member
I am ompletely torn as to whether or not to get an epidural. A part of me wants it because most women instill a sense of fear when it comes to labor pains but I can't tell if they are just being dramatic or if they just have a very low pain tolerance or if it really does feel like your insides are being scrambled with a hot poker. Most of all I want to do what is best for my baby. I would love to hear from moms who have gone through either delivery, or even if you are struggling with the same decision...
Kimberly Harvey
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Re: epi or no?
My natural birth was one of the most empowering things I've done in my life.
If you're truly undecided, "The Big Book of Birth" and "Your Best Birth" would be good books to start with. Get educated on all your options and make a decision based on what best fits your needs and expectations.
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I'm still struggling to come to a neutral peaceful place on the pain and my expectations. How do you prepare for something youve never experienced? But my midwives and husband remind me that I'm not alone during the process. We have done a lot
of planning/research/classes on what is normal and natural, and comfort measures to handle each stage. And a lot of research on how interventions like epidurals can lead to unnecessary interventions. You don't go natural because you enjoy pain, there's a much deeper reason.
I found it incredibly fascinating that you will find massive amounts of woman who have guilt or trauma from having a typical epidural hospital experience. But I have yet to find someone who regretted having a natural child birth, especially in a environment where they felt safe, and loved. To me, feeling loved and safe is essential.
Every woman should feel supported and loved during this process, and in the end a happy and healthy mommy and baby should be everyone's goal regardless of what route that they took.
I intended to have a natural, med-free birth, BUT--I knew in advance that if for some reason I decided to get an epidural I was NOT going to feel guilty about it or like I had failed in some way.
I labored med free for 8 hours or so, but my water had broken and I wasn't progressing, so I was told I either needed to get pitocin or probably end up getting a c-section. Once I was confronted with that decision, I asked for the epidural. I ended up getting the pitocin and after that things were a breeze--I progressed quickly, pushed for an hour, and gave birth to a beautiful, healthy baby boy, who had no negative effects from the epidural or the pitocin.
This choice is very personal, and only you can make it. I think the most important thing is not to make a decision out of fear! Don't choose an epi just because you fear experiencing any pain at all; but don't choose not to get meds because of the horror stories you hear about negative side effects. I feel like some people try to promote natural birth by instilling fear of things like epidurals in women, and that's wrong.
Finally, remember that you can always change your mind once you go into labor and discover what it is like for you personally.
As far as choosing natural or no you have to decide what is going to make you the most relaxed and comfortable. For me, giving birth in a hospital with drugs sounds like a nightmare come to reality. I did not want to go through that! For some women, giving birth anywhere but a hospital without any pain management sounds like a nightmare. It depends on what sounds the best to you personally.
For me, giving birth was extremely painful, but it was not the most painful sensation I've ever felt. But everyone is different.
You have to relax while laboring or you stall or slow to a crawl. Whatever you can do to relax is key.
I didn't practice any relaxation techniques before hand and I was all tense when the MW came to my home about halfway into my labor. She watched me tense up during contractions. She said that I was on my way to a long labor. She told me to relax, helped me to breath and vocalize in order to relax, and didn't check me until five hours later and I just so happened to be ready to push! I might have even been able to push sooner but I had gotten so far into "the zone" I was ready for anything.
Everybody is different but I think not getting checked often helped me to relax a lot, like covering the screen on a treadmill while you exercise so you can't see how much longer you have to go or when the hard parts are coming up.
I went into natural birth knowing that I didn't want it any other way and the only pain management available to me was to finish birthing my baby. My husband was very supportive and I was responsive to the coaching that my MW and her assistant were giving me.
Lurk on this board a while, read some books on natural birth, make your decision based on what you know about yourself.
I had an 11 hour labor with no interventions or medication. It was the most amazing experience. It was intense, it was painful, and it was emotional. However, it was wonderful and I would not have changed a thing. Women have been giving birth for thousands of years. I figured my body was designed to do it and it was pain I could handle. IMO the biggest thing is being mentally prepared for L&D. If you are prepared for the pain and supported by loved ones, you can do it.
With my second delivery, I again planned for a medfree birth. This time, circumstances were different and while labor was intense, I was able to labor and deliver vaginally with no pain meds. I liked being able to move around and feel myself pushing and not be attached to a million different medical devices
I don't think I am dramatic or have usually low pain tolerance, but my labors were definitely among the most painful moments of my life. I think it helps to be honest about that. Some people have very easy labors, but it is usually hard. But with the right support, I absolutely think most people can do it medfree. It is just a question of what you feel is right for you.
I've never had anything too painful, either. The most painful thing I have experienced was maybe a hard fall or tattoo.
I didn't think of labor as pain, but instead as progress. I also refused to believe it was the horrible, dramatic pain many describe. I kept thinking, "yes, this is intense, but it could be worse. I could be in labor and have my fingers broken or in labor with third degree burns." I realize that is bizarre, but it helped me have a really powerful and amazing natural birth.
Some of it for me was about control - I knew I would feel powerless, but I wanted to feel powerless to my body and to the process, not to machines and medical staff. If an epidural came without an IV and continuous monitoring and being confined to the bed, I would have been more open to it. But it doesn't.
And no amount of pain scared me as much as the thought of going through the same pain after a failed epidural. I'd just heard too many stories of epidurals that didn't work, or only half-worked. Contractions are one thing, but not being able to move through them? Eff that. That was not a chance I wanted to take.
When it comes down to it, an epidural is a labor tool. If you and your provider are in agreement that it's the best tool to reach for in a given situation, use it.
I had epidurals with my first 2 births and was medfree for my 3rd. #1 I was induced and had the epidural placed a couple hours after they started. #2 I got the epi around 7cm (didn't know I was that far along). My birth with #3 was pretty amazing.
That being said, all my children were alert and perfect. #3 was stunned (he came super fast) and needed a touch of oxygen, but otherwise was great.