DS wants to be a girl (WDPT?)
blowfish11
member
Yesterday I asked DS what he wanted to be when he grows up. He said "I want to be a girl".
DH and I both think that he says this because he's surrounded by women. DH is the only real constant male in his life. All the uncles and male cousins are in California where we are from.
However, I had a friend over at the time that he said this. And she asked me if I thought this was just a sign of things to come. We both vehemently believe that people are born with their sexuality, being gay is not a choice, etc... So what if this is him expressing his desire to really be a girl? He does enjoy dress up, "girls" toys, purses, jewelry... But he also really loves bikes and cars and his skateboard and building blocks. We allow him to dress up in his sister's clothes and play with her more feminine toys.... WDPT?
Let me just say that I want him to be exactly who he is and we will love him no matter what. I just wondered what y'all think. 
Avery - 8.2.07 | Asher - 5.12.10 | Audrey - 11.28.12
Re: DS wants to be a girl (WDPT?)
How old is he? Turning 3 right?
he's just hitting the early side of when kids get that boys and girls are different so it may be nothing more then him realizing he's different from you and his sisters.
That said I would just not make a big deal either way if he says that just say OK. Same with the toys he plays with/wants let him play/have what he wants (I. Terms of presents, picking at a friends house, etc)
if it turns out that it is part of who he is then he'll be comfortable coming to you about it and you can go from there, if its just a phase then it'll pass.
Yes, he is 3.
We definitely didn't make a big deal or question him about it or anything like that. I was a little bit surprised by it, but that passed quickly.
Either way, he will know that I love him beyond any measure.
Avery - 8.2.07 | Asher - 5.12.10 | Audrey - 11.28.12
This is your 3yo that said it?? I do not think for a second that his statement alone is any indication of his sexual orientation. He has sisters, is surrounded by "girl" toys, and has no real grasp what it means for him to become a female. I wouldn't think twice about it to be honest. I agree he is who he is already, no amount of dolls and dress up with his sisters is going to "change" him.
I think it takes a lot more than a one-time comment to indicate anything clear about a kid's future. Gender identity, job, anything.
My DD2 says regularly that she's going to grow up to be Jake the Never Land pirate, and she's worn a pirate scarf 99% of the time since last Halloween. I still don't think it's going to happen.
I say, "Okay!", smile and nod and I'm indulgent. But most likes and aspirations at this age are not reflective of the future.
DD1, 1/5/2008 ~~~ DD2, 3/17/2010
I think it's great that you are understanding and want him to be happy. I would continue doing what you are doing and let him figure out who he is. Saying he wants to be a girl when he is 3 doesn't necessarily mean he is transgendered. I wanted to be a dinosaur when I was 3. NBD.
Fred, maybe if she didn't have to call it a vulva she would like it better (just kidding, I couldn't help it.... but seriously, I can't say vulva with a straight face, does that make me an arse?)
OP, I agree with the others, don't give it much thought at this point
"We like nothing better than buffing our Zygoma. And imagining a horny time traveling long overcoat purple scarf wearing super sleuth nordic legend fuck fantasy. Get to work on that, internet." Benedict Cumberbatch
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Um, what?
Come again??
Anyway, I wanted to be a boy really bad at a much later age, like 8, 9. I'm currently a straight female. It could mean something or it could mean nothing, but I'd say it's too early to tell. Def don't say the thing above about God's design, though, please.
You sound fun.
This just goes to show that I watch too much daytime TV, but Ricky Lake had a show on transgendered kids last week. It would be worth watching in the event that your son is serious about wanting to be a girl, if you can find that particular episode online. I agree with the PPs, however, that it also may mean nothing... But it doesn't hurt to be prepared!
Well, God screwed up then cause my perfect partner would have boobs and peen.
"We like nothing better than buffing our Zygoma. And imagining a horny time traveling long overcoat purple scarf wearing super sleuth nordic legend fuck fantasy. Get to work on that, internet." Benedict Cumberbatch
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You don't even know if the OP believes in god. This is a bold assumption.
Plus, transgendered people already identify as the other sex, so if you believe in god then technically he made them like that.
And of course you can change your sex. Hormone treatments, for one.
I can't get the ticker to work, but I have two sons:
Baby RJ, born 1/25/2014
Formerly Twilightmv
IKR?! Wife07mom, where'd ya go?
LOLz.
Please also explain that God constructed rigid gender rules too and that the fluidity of modern understandings of gender IS THE WHISPER IN OUR EARS FROM SATAN.
Seriously though OP: Each of my children has expressed a desire early in their days of being a different gender. It's OK.
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Thank you for all of your responses.
I'm certainly not worried about it and for the record, I do not believe in God, and I will not be telling my 3 year old that he cannot do anything to change his physical appearance to reflect how he feels on the inside. I love my son. I will not make him feel as though he isn't allowed to be who he is. So Wife07, thanks, but no fuckkings thanks.
Avery - 8.2.07 | Asher - 5.12.10 | Audrey - 11.28.12
That much is certain.
Avery - 8.2.07 | Asher - 5.12.10 | Audrey - 11.28.12
False. There are several things a person can do to change their outer appearance to reflect what is on the inside.
Avery - 8.2.07 | Asher - 5.12.10 | Audrey - 11.28.12
As my boss once said to me about some biitchy know it all we were working with, "It must feel great to just know you're right all the time."