I'm sick of food. I'm at the point where I have to force myself to eat. I didn't eat lunch until 3pm yesterday because I just couldn't deal with it. I got the same way when I was pregnant with Jack. Eating just makes me feel gross by the end.
I told DH yesterday that all I want for Mothers Day is the new Sookie Stackhouse book and to be left alone for 4 hours so I can read it. Yep, Mother of the Year right here.
TTC Baby Rob #1 05/07, BFP 06/07, EDD 02/22/08, Baby Jackaroo born via c-section after 22 hours of labor on 02/27/08 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TTC Baby Rob #2 06/11 BFP 11/06/11 EDD 07/16/12 Natural M/C 11/25/11 @ 6w3d Baby Rob #2 (Sloane), in our hearts always. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Here comes Baby Rob #3 BFP on Cycle 17 09/27/12. EDD 06/04/12! Please Stick Baby! A/S 01/22/13 Baby looking great. Officially TEAM BLUE! Jack is getting a Baby Brother! RCS scheduled for 05/29/13. William Daryll born at 9:59am on 05/29/13. Left ovary and tube removed due to peach sized tumor found during RCS. Pathology came back benign!
Oh, DH keeps hinting and asking "what about this for your mother's day gift" and I'm purposely not giving him any ideas. We've been married 5 years man, you've surprised me with good stuff before, I know you can do this.
Oh, DH keeps hinting and asking "what about this for your mother's day gift" and I'm purposely not giving him any ideas. We've been married 5 years man, you've surprised me with good stuff before, I know you can do this.
We've been married for 3 years, together for 5 and H just asked me what I wanted from Paris for my birthday. He's only bought me two crappy gifts ever so I have faith he can figure it out.
I cried while trying to put together our new pack n play last night. Full blown ugly cry. Then I walked around the house, cried some more, and felt bad about myself when I caught a glimpse of my puffy red face in the mirror which triggered more crying. I could have totally sucked it up and managed to put the rest of it together, but it's currently in about 20 pieces on our living room floor. If it's not put together when I get home from work today, I might have a repeat crying session.
I would have cried too. There's a reason DH has put everything together. I get frustrated too easily. *hugs*
I cried while trying to put together our new pack n play last night. Full blown ugly cry. Then I walked around the house, cried some more, and felt bad about myself when I caught a glimpse of my puffy red face in the mirror which triggered more crying. I could have totally sucked it up and managed to put the rest of it together, but it's currently in about 20 pieces on our living room floor. If it's not put together when I get home from work today, I might have a repeat crying session.
Oh, I'm so sorry! I had a meltdown when I tried to put together the pack n play too. I kept thinking 'if I can't do this, how can I be allowed to have a kid!' I ended up having to call my SIL and have her walk me through it over the phone.
Oh, DH keeps hinting and asking "what about this for your mother's day gift" and I'm purposely not giving him any ideas. We've been married 5 years man, you've surprised me with good stuff before, I know you can do this.
We've been married for 3 years, together for 5 and H just asked me what I wanted from Paris for my birthday. He's only bought me two crappy gifts ever so I have faith he can figure it out.
I think he's just hung up on it being a "new" holiday because we've never exchanged gifts for it before and he wants it to be perfect. Silly man.
Almost none of DH's family is coming to my shower and I pretty upset about it. We have made it really clear that we don't want gifts, we just want to celebrate with family and friends but they can't seem to take 2 hours out of their not so busy schedule to come eat brunch. They expect us to drop everything for all the last minute family gatherings and we always do.
I know this makes me a selfish brat but it's really hard for me. I live in the Midwest and almost all of my family lives in California so when big events come up it's always a little bittersweet for me because I don't have my family around to celebrate with.
DH has a bad cold and while I do feel bad for him I mostly want him to stay the fluck away from me because I really don't want it. I totally think pregnant colds trump man colds.
I'm sick of food. I'm at the point where I have to force myself to eat. I didn't eat lunch until 3pm yesterday because I just couldn't deal with it. I got the same way when I was pregnant with Jack. Eating just makes me feel gross by the end. I told DH yesterday that all I want for Mothers Day is the new Sookie Stackhouse book and to be left alone for 4 hours so I can read it. Yep, Mother of the Year right here.
I see nothing wrong with wanting to be left alone to read the last Sookie book.
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
Almost none of DH's family is coming to my shower and I pretty upset about it.nbsp; We have made it really clear that we don't want gifts, we just want to celebrate with family and friends but they can't seem to take 2 hours out of their not so busy schedule to come eat brunch.nbsp; They expect us to drop everything for all the last minute family gatherings and we always do.
I know this makes me a selfish brat but it's really hard for me. I live in the Midwest and almost all of my family lives in California so when big events come up it's always a little bittersweet for me because I don't have my family around to celebrate with.
Pretty much the same thing happened to me for my shower and me and DH were pretty ticked about it for awhile. We ended up having a great shower anyways. Hope you have a great one too!
I really hope this baby comes Memorial Day weekend. For a whole variety of reasons but I won't do anything crazy to rush him out if he's not ready.
I'm doing the my eyes to your eyes finger point right now.
Continuing with this theme, I'm fricking uncomfortable. Yes, we all are. But I feel worse right now then I did at 39 weeks with Lucy. I don't think it is physically possible for me to be pregnant another 5 or more weeks. I don't want a torpedo belly filled with crazy stretch marks, I don't want a ripped up vag from trying to deliver a potentially 11 lb baby, and I sure don't want my guy to have a birth injury from getting stuck on the way out.
Sighhhh. I had so much confidence in my body delivering Lucy vaginally and med free. I really want to feel that way now because it is still so very important to me. But I've got a ton of negative thoughts about how this delivery will go. I hope I'm proved royally wrong come D day.
For most of this pregnancy I've been more excited to start maternity leave (I'll be off for a year) than for the actual baby. And I don't even hate my work that much. I am an awful person.
Almost none of DH's family is coming to my shower and I pretty upset about it.nbsp; We have made it really clear that we don't want gifts, we just want to celebrate with family and friends but they can't seem to take 2 hours out of their not so busy schedule to come eat brunch.nbsp; They expect us to drop everything for all the last minute family gatherings and we always do.
I know this makes me a selfish brat but it's really hard for me. I live in the Midwest and almost all of my family lives in California so when big events come up it's always a little bittersweet for me because I don't have my family around to celebrate with.
I hear you. While it's not expected, it did hurt my feelings when my MIL told me she didn't know why she was expected to come to my shower at my side of the family. I told her its never expected, but that I wanted her to know she was always welcome at anything my family holds but the choice was hers.
She did this with our wedding shower, but she actually came. She didn't bring a gift, which was fine, but I just liked having her love and support there.
Now my FFFC?
I feel like I got cheated in the inlaw process. Not shower related. I know they love us, but I get jealous when I see how good my parents are to my SIL, really treating her like a daughter and I feel like my IL's will always look at me as the mouthy [FIL has called me this before to H because I actually talk and everyone in his family just walks on eggshells when he's talking] DIL who sits on her fat ss at home while their angel son works so hard to give me everything I want.
Which is true, minus their assumptions I'm lazy and do nothing. H would do anything to make me happy and I'm grateful every day for it, but I would do the same for him.
I'm letting DD draw all over the floor with chalk. It will make H flip out when he wakes up but I don't give a rat's asss cause he stayed up all night playing game with a friend and woke me out of the first deep sleep I've has in months to gripe about his insomnia. I have zero sympathy for him having to watch DD all day after almost no sleep. I've done it many times.
Today is my last day of work and I plan on doing as little as possible. Probably going to spend the day drinking coffee and bumping at my desk!
I hope LO doesn't come until July.
I've lived off junk food this week.
I drink at least 3 cans of pop a day.
DH wants him to come on his birthday. His birthday is exactly a month after my EDD. Um, no.
Yeah, there is no way I would want to go over a whole month. Just want to go like 5 days. SO is going to be across the country the whole month of June and I want him to be with me when LO decides to make her appearance.
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
I just got on bed rest and these stupid people keep sending me more paper work to fill out to get short term disability they make it so difficult you just want to cry and say all this stress is not worth the money especially since I'm supposed to be stress free on bed rest!!! Ughhh
I hope LO doesn't come until July. I've lived off junk food this week. I drink at least 3 cans of pop a day.
DH wants him to come on his birthday. His birthday is exactly a month after my EDD. Um, no.
I have the opposite problem. DH basiclly demanded that LO NOT show up on his birthday (June 8, I am due June 30) because he wants June 8 all to himself FOREVER.
Seriously dude, the kid is going to show up when he wants to show up GET OVER IT!
I hope LO doesn't come until July. I've lived off junk food this week. I drink at least 3 cans of pop a day.
DH wants him to come on his birthday. His birthday is exactly a month after my EDD. Um, no.
I have the opposite problem. DH basiclly demanded that LO NOT show up on his birthday (June 8, I am due June 30) because he wants June 8 all to himself FOREVER.
Seriously dude, the kid is going to show up when he wants to show up GET OVER IT!
Lol. DH's birthday is July 8. His mom put it in his head b/c she was due in June and went 3 weeks over due. We were discussing how if he came in May he'd have emerald as a birthstone not pearl. DH said "No, he'll have ruby." No, no he will not.
I cried while trying to put together our new pack n play last night. Full blown ugly cry. Then I walked around the house, cried some more, and felt bad about myself when I caught a glimpse of my puffy red face in the mirror which triggered more crying. I could have totally sucked it up and managed to put the rest of it together, but it's currently in about 20 pieces on our living room floor. If it's not put together when I get home from work today, I might have a repeat crying session.
I cried for a half hour when DH started to put up the baby's closet organizer and we realized it was too tall. I feel ya.
I haven't washed any of the baby stuff yet. And when I do I am going to use regular detergent. I think that the specialized baby detergent is just a way to get people to spend more money on stuff they dont really need.
Now my FFFC?
I feel like I got cheated in the inlaw process. Not shower related. I know they love us, but I get jealous when I see how good my parents are to my SIL, really treating her like a daughter and I feel like my IL's will always look at me as the mouthy [FIL has called me this before to H because I actually talk and everyone in his family just walks on eggshells when he's talking] DIL who sits on her fat ss at home while their angel son works so hard to give me everything I want.
Which is true, minus their assumptions I'm lazy and do nothing. H would do anything to make me happy and I'm grateful every day for it, but I would do the same for him.
I'm just full of feelings today lol
My MIL introduces SIL as her "daughter", and me as her DIL. I mean SIL does live in the same town as MIL, but it still stings. She also calls me the wrong name a lot.
1. I registered for the Rock N Play Sleeper and it went on sale, so I bought it, then I added the more expensive Rock N Play Sleeper, and someone bought it, and I plan on taking it back and using that money towards other stuff.
2. As much as I do not under any circumstance want an intervention, I am secretly hoping my child is breech so I can schedule a C a week in advance, just so I don't have to deal with him going over his due date. I really DONT want a C though, but I am totally wishing he will just get here early.
SURPRISE! BFP: 12/2014 - EDD: 8/13/15
We made plans and God laughed
DS: BFP: 9/30/12 - EDD: 6/9/13
Radley Quinn was fashionably late via induction on 6/17/13
I looked at our duty schedule at school for the final weeks. My principal put me on both morning and afternoon recess duty for the final week of school. I'll be 37 weeks. Part of me says suck it up, but the other part says NO FAIR and wants to go into the office and get out of it.
Almost none of DH's family is coming to my shower and I pretty upset about it. We have made it really clear that we don't want gifts, we just want to celebrate with family and friends but they can't seem to take 2 hours out of their not so busy schedule to come eat brunch. They expect us to drop everything for all the last minute family gatherings and we always do.
I know this makes me a selfish brat but it's really hard for me. I live in the Midwest and almost all of my family lives in California so when big events come up it's always a little bittersweet for me because I don't have my family around to celebrate with.
I'm sorry. I do not think that makes you a selfish brat and I completely understand. My fam is on the east coast and we are in Memphis
Sometimes people want to visit at the hospital and I don't want them to. So I constantly pretend I never got their message, text, smoke signal, whatever.
I feel like I got cheated in the inlaw process. Not shower related. I know they love us, but I get jealous when I see how good my parents are to my SIL, really treating her like a daughter and I feel like my IL's will always look at me as the mouthy [FIL has called me this before to H because I actually talk and everyone in his family just walks on eggshells when he's talking] DIL who sits on her fat ss at home while their angel son works so hard to give me everything I want.
Which is true, minus their assumptions I'm lazy and do nothing. H would do anything to make me happy and I'm grateful every day for it, but I would do the same for him.
I'm just full of feelings today lol
My MIL introduces SIL as her "daughter", and me as her DIL. I mean SIL does live in the same town as MIL, but it still stings. She also calls me the wrong name a lot.
I get called the wrong name too, but it's usually SIL name which is only a few letters off mine.
Mine might actually be somewhat flame worthy this week.
We had lunch with 2 couples last week. We are all due within a week of each other - me being last. Seeing how miserable they were and how ready they were for this to all be done with made me feel so much better about the energy I still have and how great I still feel.
I feel kinda bad thinking this but at the same time I know that both of their pregnancies have been relatively easy and completely complication free.
ETA: Now I feel like the biggest biotch in the world and want to delete this post so bad. One of the girls just texted me to say she is being induced Wed due to high BP. GAH I am the worst!!!! She is due 3 days before me. Im probably going to hell now.
I have two:
I have been listening to NSYNC all week.nbsp; I had "It's gonna me me" stuck in my head yesterday.nbsp; I don't plan to stop listening anytime soon, and download more songs most likely.
I really want LO to come on June 2.nbsp; It's our 11 year dating anniversary and the anniversary of when we got engaged.nbsp; I think it would be fun to have a baby on the same day, and I'd be 39w1d, so I know it's very possible.nbsp; Also, I know I should be prepared for her to be late, but I know if I pass my EDD with no baby, I will probably cry a little.nbsp; But ultimately I just want a healthy baby, so please know that I am not going to freak out if I am overdue and I will not rush her out if she's not ready.nbsp; It would just be nice if it went my way [:]
I was gently reminded by my husband last night that I need to be more calm and patient in my interactions with Lucy.
I wanted to kinda yell at him that if he were on the 12th round of "mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy" of the day, his tone would be less than charming.
But mostly I feel like crap because he is right and I'm thankful to have my partner remind me of the parenting style we both chose. It totally isn't her fault that I'm pregnant and tired. She's doing the normal toddler thing and I need to just take deep breaths and deal with her 800th request for candy or for the dog to stop looking at her or give her the ability to put her flip flops on over her sneakers. You know, the reasonable stuff.
Sometimes people want to visit at the hospital and I don't want them to. So I constantly pretend I never got their message, text, smoke signal, whatever.
You're not alone! Other nicu mommies say the same thing. People don't get it sometimes. I would disguise my visits as a quick sbux delivery with a hug and I could get a chance to lay my eyes on the LO, which satisfied me just fine!
Oh, DH keeps hinting and asking "what about this for your mother's day gift" and I'm purposely not giving him any ideas. We've been married 5 years man, you've surprised me with good stuff before, I know you can do this.
My husband always waits till the last minute and usually ends taking me to buy whatever I want. I love surprises and would love for him to put some thought into actually picking something out for me. Doesn't need to be anything fancy. Just surprise me.
I've been with my husband for 6 years. I've done some pretty bad a s s things for him for holidays and I can honestly say he's got me one gift that he actually put thought and effort into. Sometimes no gift or even a card as well. I try to tell myself every holiday that it won't be any different this time so don't be upset. I'm upset every time... mothers day won't be any different this year, and given the way he's been acting and making me feel lately I'm going to ugly cry for sure.
I think it would be cool for Baby to arrive at 40w 1d... cause it would be 14 months after our wedding, plus would put Baby's delivery on a Saturday- just like me and Hubs! It would also mean people MIGHT actually visit us... besides our parents, our families have NEVER seen this place we live in, or the last one (where we lived for 6 years).
And also it would mean effecting time off less because it would be perfect week ending time etc. Yup... I'm weird.
Our lil' diva: late like her Momma: 40 weeks 5 days!
BLT20051
member
Re: FFFC
CJ 05/29/2013
I'm sick of food. I'm at the point where I have to force myself to eat. I didn't eat lunch until 3pm yesterday because I just couldn't deal with it. I got the same way when I was pregnant with Jack. Eating just makes me feel gross by the end.
I told DH yesterday that all I want for Mothers Day is the new Sookie Stackhouse book and to be left alone for 4 hours so I can read it. Yep, Mother of the Year right here.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TTC Baby Rob #1 05/07, BFP 06/07, EDD 02/22/08, Baby Jackaroo born via c-section after 22 hours of labor on 02/27/08
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TTC Baby Rob #2 06/11 BFP 11/06/11 EDD 07/16/12 Natural M/C 11/25/11 @ 6w3d
Baby Rob #2 (Sloane), in our hearts always.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Here comes Baby Rob #3
BFP on Cycle 17 09/27/12. EDD 06/04/12! Please Stick Baby! A/S 01/22/13 Baby looking great. Officially TEAM BLUE! Jack is getting a Baby Brother! RCS scheduled for 05/29/13. William Daryll born at 9:59am on 05/29/13. Left ovary and tube removed due to peach sized tumor found during RCS. Pathology came back benign!
CJ 05/29/2013
I would have cried too. There's a reason DH has put everything together. I get frustrated too easily. *hugs*
CJ 05/29/2013
Oh, I'm so sorry! I had a meltdown when I tried to put together the pack n play too. I kept thinking 'if I can't do this, how can I be allowed to have a kid!' I ended up having to call my SIL and have her walk me through it over the phone.
my read shelf:
CJ 05/29/2013
Almost none of DH's family is coming to my shower and I pretty upset about it. We have made it really clear that we don't want gifts, we just want to celebrate with family and friends but they can't seem to take 2 hours out of their not so busy schedule to come eat brunch. They expect us to drop everything for all the last minute family gatherings and we always do.
I know this makes me a selfish brat but it's really hard for me. I live in the Midwest and almost all of my family lives in California so when big events come up it's always a little bittersweet for me because I don't have my family around to celebrate with.
my read shelf:
I've lived off junk food this week.
I drink at least 3 cans of pop a day.
I see nothing wrong with wanting to be left alone to read the last Sookie book.
Pretty much the same thing happened to me for my shower and me and DH were pretty ticked about it for awhile. We ended up having a great shower anyways. Hope you have a great one too!
CJ 05/29/2013
I'm doing the my eyes to your eyes finger point right now.
Continuing with this theme, I'm fricking uncomfortable. Yes, we all are. But I feel worse right now then I did at 39 weeks with Lucy. I don't think it is physically possible for me to be pregnant another 5 or more weeks. I don't want a torpedo belly filled with crazy stretch marks, I don't want a ripped up vag from trying to deliver a potentially 11 lb baby, and I sure don't want my guy to have a birth injury from getting stuck on the way out.
Sighhhh. I had so much confidence in my body delivering Lucy vaginally and med free. I really want to feel that way now because it is still so very important to me. But I've got a ton of negative thoughts about how this delivery will go. I hope I'm proved royally wrong come D day.
I hear you. While it's not expected, it did hurt my feelings when my MIL told me she didn't know why she was expected to come to my shower at my side of the family. I told her its never expected, but that I wanted her to know she was always welcome at anything my family holds but the choice was hers.
She did this with our wedding shower, but she actually came. She didn't bring a gift, which was fine, but I just liked having her love and support there.
Now my FFFC?
I feel like I got cheated in the inlaw process. Not shower related. I know they love us, but I get jealous when I see how good my parents are to my SIL, really treating her like a daughter and I feel like my IL's will always look at me as the mouthy [FIL has called me this before to H because I actually talk and everyone in his family just walks on eggshells when he's talking] DIL who sits on her fat ss at home while their angel son works so hard to give me everything I want.
Which is true, minus their assumptions I'm lazy and do nothing. H would do anything to make me happy and I'm grateful every day for it, but I would do the same for him.
I'm just full of feelings today lol
Today is my last day of work and I plan on doing as little as possible. Probably going to spend the day drinking coffee and bumping at my desk!
I hope DS doesn't show up during my May-mester class or I have to pay back my scholarship money.
I am over this whole pregnancy thing. I'm tired of gaining weight, being too big and not being able to do much.
Lastly, I have been indulging in junk food lately because that is all that sounds good right now.
Yeah, there is no way I would want to go over a whole month. Just want to go like 5 days. SO is going to be across the country the whole month of June and I want him to be with me when LO decides to make her appearance.
I have the opposite problem. DH basiclly demanded that LO NOT show up on his birthday (June 8, I am due June 30) because he wants June 8 all to himself FOREVER.
Seriously dude, the kid is going to show up when he wants to show up GET OVER IT!
CJ 05/29/2013
I cried for a half hour when DH started to put up the baby's closet organizer and we realized it was too tall. I feel ya.
I have two...
1. I registered for the Rock N Play Sleeper and it went on sale, so I bought it, then I added the more expensive Rock N Play Sleeper, and someone bought it, and I plan on taking it back and using that money towards other stuff.
2. As much as I do not under any circumstance want an intervention, I am secretly hoping my child is breech so I can schedule a C a week in advance, just so I don't have to deal with him going over his due date. I really DONT want a C though, but I am totally wishing he will just get here early.
SURPRISE! BFP: 12/2014 - EDD: 8/13/15
We made plans and God laughed
DS: BFP: 9/30/12 - EDD: 6/9/13
Radley Quinn was fashionably late via induction on 6/17/13
I'm sorry. I do not think that makes you a selfish brat and I completely understand. My fam is on the east coast and we are in Memphis
B was born on Labor Day so I'm really hoping for Memorial Day.
I'm not new. I just hate The Bump.
I get called the wrong name too, but it's usually SIL name which is only a few letters off mine.
Mine might actually be somewhat flame worthy this week.
We had lunch with 2 couples last week. We are all due within a week of each other - me being last. Seeing how miserable they were and how ready they were for this to all be done with made me feel so much better about the energy I still have and how great I still feel.
I feel kinda bad thinking this but at the same time I know that both of their pregnancies have been relatively easy and completely complication free.
ETA: Now I feel like the biggest biotch in the world and want to delete this post so bad. One of the girls just texted me to say she is being induced Wed due to high BP. GAH I am the worst!!!! She is due 3 days before me. Im probably going to hell now.
That would be awesome!
CJ 05/29/2013
It's gonna be may ay ayyyy
I'm not new. I just hate The Bump.
I was gently reminded by my husband last night that I need to be more calm and patient in my interactions with Lucy.
I wanted to kinda yell at him that if he were on the 12th round of "mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy" of the day, his tone would be less than charming.
But mostly I feel like crap because he is right and I'm thankful to have my partner remind me of the parenting style we both chose. It totally isn't her fault that I'm pregnant and tired. She's doing the normal toddler thing and I need to just take deep breaths and deal with her 800th request for candy or for the dog to stop looking at her or give her the ability to put her flip flops on over her sneakers. You know, the reasonable stuff.
You're not alone! Other nicu mommies say the same thing. People don't get it sometimes. I would disguise my visits as a quick sbux delivery with a hug and I could get a chance to lay my eyes on the LO, which satisfied me just fine!
I've been with my husband for 6 years. I've done some pretty bad a s s things for him for holidays and I can honestly say he's got me one gift that he actually put thought and effort into. Sometimes no gift or even a card as well. I try to tell myself every holiday that it won't be any different this time so don't be upset. I'm upset every time... mothers day won't be any different this year, and given the way he's been acting and making me feel lately I'm going to ugly cry for sure.
My Blog
I think it would be cool for Baby to arrive at 40w 1d... cause it would be 14 months after our wedding, plus would put Baby's delivery on a Saturday- just like me and Hubs! It would also mean people MIGHT actually visit us... besides our parents, our families have NEVER seen this place we live in, or the last one (where we lived for 6 years).
And also it would mean effecting time off less because it would be perfect week ending time etc. Yup... I'm weird.
Our lil' diva: late like her Momma: 40 weeks 5 days!