April 2013 Moms
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In-law/dh frustration

So I will start this off by saying that the majority of my family live within 10 minutes of me so I'm trying to be understanding/open minded about this situation right now....but I'm getting very frustrated.

I have told DH that I'm a little nervous for when his family comes in town when we have this baby, because I'm afraid they are going to want to stay at our house.  I don't want to be ungrateful, but that last thing I want when we're coming home with our little one is a house full of people.  I want to get settled as a family and not have to worry about anyone else.  I have no problem with them coming to visit, but if I'm going to be trying to BF and learn things on my own, I don't want others in my house making it awkward.  DH seemed to be understanding...so I thought.

Well last night I got a voicemail from my father in law while DH was gone, saying that DH's brother (who is a senior) has qualified to run in this big track meet the weekend of April 26-28th, so he was hoping we could pick him up a ticket so he could come down and watch.  Great--not a problem....except I'm due April 27th.  I sent DH a text explaining and said, lets chat about where your dad is going to stay before you call him back.  so when he got home I said, that's the weekend of my due date, I don't know what our situation will be (baby, no baby, etc) can you chat with your dad about bringing the camper down or figuring something else out.  He sounded on board.  Then when I talked to him TODAY he said he got the ticket for his dad, and I asked "did you discuss sleeping accommodations and he said "Yes, he asked if he could stay with us Friday night and I told him that was fine."  

EXCUSE ME??  Was I talking to myself last night???  Am I crazy??? 

My biggest concern is that I'm going to be 40 weeks pregnant and slightly miserable (I already opt-out of pants the majority of nights when I get home because nothing is comfortable) or I will have a brand new baby at home...neither of which screams, "please come stay at my house!"  And not only that, if this is how he's handling this now, what will he say when I do go into labor and they ask to stay?  He just acts like it's no big deal.



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Re: In-law/dh frustration

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    That's a man for you!  In one ear and out the other.  Have him tell his dad that he wasn't thinking about the date and now realizes that the timing is poor.  

    Good luck! 

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    You need to get DH on the same page as you.  You might have had this conversation a time or two with DH, but he really needs to get on board.  Tell him the most supportive/helpful thing he could do is back you up, because at 40 weeks you aren

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    This is unrelated to your actual question, but are you talking about the Drake Relays? I'm due that weekend, too and live in Des Moines.

    Maybe he will be so busy that he will literally just be sleeping at your place and gone the rest of the
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    imagecheesecakerunner:
    This is unrelated to your actual question, but are you talking about the Drake Relays? I'm due that weekend,

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    I understand your frustration, but I actually see both sides of this.  My parents drive me and DH crazy, but if I told them that they couldn't stay with us it would really hurt their feelings.  Especially if we have the room.  Luckily, this
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