Infertility Veterans

Hi Guys...

Thanks for the shout outs. I heard about it off board and I appreciate it. It's been the worst month of my life unfortunately. My beta just continued to rise stupidly and we could not see anything on u/s. I started to bleed on a Tuesday and asked that we wait a few more days for the beta to drop as I really did not want MTX. As stupid as it sounds, I did not want to prevent for 3months post-shot so it was important to me to not get it if we were just guessing. My beta finally started to drop and as of this Thursday was down to 32. Hopefully it will be zero end of next week. 

DH and I have decided to sell our 4brm house in a kid-infested cul de sac. There is not reason to stay here since my job here ended and we have no family near by and the house is big for just the two of us. It would be better for us to move on and have more money for traveling etc than on a big mortgage on an empty house. The house is going on the market on Thursday. I love the house so this is really hard for me on top of everything else as I envisioned raising my kids here when we bought it. But that is just not my life's path for reasons I just don't understand. We are going back to DH's home city about 45 mins north. Hopefully the house sells quickly as I hate the idea of people trodding through here all the time. 

I've missed you all. It was very difficult to leave here cold turkey but it was what I had to do to get by. I just did not have an ability to share in others' joy when my own was ripped away from me on our very last try. I wish I was stronger than that but I'm not. Unfortunately not everyone gets a happy ending in the quest to have a baby and now I know I am one of them. Everyone always thinks it will never be them but it has to be someone..... 

Anyway, I have to go to a dinner with the IL's today. I can only imagine what will come out of MIL's mouth and I really am going to stand up for myself. I don't need someone who had 3 kids back to back to back in her late 30's in the 1960s tell me how great my life can be without kids when she has no experience "not" having kids and always wants everyone down visiting her. We'll have no one visiting us- how would she like that? No  holds barred. I'm hormonal and CFNBC!!! 

TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14  ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d

DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!

K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days

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SAIF/PAIF Welcome


http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com

Re: Hi Guys...

  • McIrish, I've been thinking of you a lot these past few weeks.  I'm so so sorry about this horrible news.  You are in my thoughts and prayers and I wish you peace.
    Me-42 DH-43 TTC #1 since 3/11
    HSG 7/11 showed possible blockage
    8/11 BFP, then early m/c  (Natural)
    9/11 blood tests reveal Factor V Leiden (heterozygous)
    11/11 Hysteroscopy revealed uterine septum, which was repaired
    12/11 1st round of Clomid (100mg)=BFN
    1/12 2nd round of Clomid (100mg)=BFN 
    2/12 Repeat HSG=All clear 
    2/12 IUI with injectables #1=BFN 
    3/12 natural cycle=BFN 
    4/12 IUI with injectables #2=C/P 
    7/12 IVF #1=30ER, 9F, 3T, 1 Frostie 7/29=BFP! 
    8/27/12 No Heartbeat. Waiting to M/C 
    9/13/12 D+C
    12/12 Operative Hysteroscopy 
    1/31/12  IVF#2 ...BFP 2/6 m/c 2/12 methotrexate due to presumed ectopic
    July '13 IVF #3: 13R, 10M, 8F=BFP
    1st Beta=549  2nd Beta 594 3rd Beta 422. M/C #5
    IVF#4 in November=BFP…TWINS!!!!!

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • __ticker warning______

    McIrish I am so sorry things have ended this way for you, I hope that one day there will be light at the end of this dark tunnel. Please take care of yourself. 

    6 m/c
    Anovulatory cycles, increased Synthroid Diagnosed Sep 2010
    Natural cycle Dec 2010 BFP M/C 6 1/2 Weeks, D&E Jan 2011
    1 Clomid/Ovidrel BFN May 2011
    Natural cycle Aug 2011 BFP M/C 4 Weeks
    1 IUI Sept 2011 BFP M/c 7 weeks
    Provera Dec 2011 BFP M/C 3 Weeks
    DQ ALPHA HLA MATCH, High NK Cells Diagnosed Dec 2011
    IVF March 2012 BFP m/c 4weeks 5 days (IL, Prednisone)
    IVF#2w/DS July 2012 MEGA FAILURE BFN (IL, Dexamethasone)
    Diagnosed No real HLA Match, DQ Beta Triad, High TNF, Low NK Cells
    Oct 2012 Natural Cycle m/c 4wks (Lovenox, Prednisone) 
    Went to Beer Center- high tnf, low lad, implantation failure
    Nov/Dec 2012 LIT Treatment
    Dec 12 Humira
    Jan 2013 BFP
    Humira,LIT,Prednisone, Lovenox, IVIG, Baby Aspirin
    Miracle Born August 2013 Premature

    Yours doesn't have to be a sad story



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    Lilypie - (ugiy)


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  • *ticker*

    I'm so sorry. 

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  • Always thinking of and praying for you. I'm so heartbroken your path has ended here... Fx your house sells quickly and your MIL has the decency to keep her trap shut.
    TTC #1 Since 4/2010, Cycle 30
    Positive for HLA-B27, I'm a mutant :p
    Testing - Me ok, gluten issue? DH - borderline count, low motility
    4/28/11 IUI#1 = BFP!(5/25), EDD 2/2/12 - m/c 5w3d
    7/3, 7/31, 9/25 - IUI#2-4=BFN
    IVF#1 - 1 blast = BFP!! (12/30), EDD 9/9/12, confirmed c/p 4w2d
    FET#1 3/2/12 - 2 blasts =BFP!! EDD 11/18/12, us#1 = twins! Confirmed m/c 5w6d
    4/20-surprise BFP and another c/p 4w2d
    FET#2 7/16/12 - 2 blasts = BFN
    FET#3 8/20/12 - 1 blast - BFP!! Beta #1-2=177, 354
    1st u/s 5w6d, one beautiful little HB :), 2nd u/s 146bpm
    baby girl born 5/10/13

    TTC#2 since 12/17/2014, Cycle 8
    Repeat Testing...FSH=12, AMH=3.8, AFC=28. 
    IUI#5 5/10/15- c/p?
    IVF#2 8/19/15 - cancelled due to cysts
    IVF#2 take two 10/2015 - 5 blasts frozen
    FET#4 12/11/2015 - BFN - 4 blasts remaining
    FET#5 2/18/16 - BFP!!!  Beta1-3, 126, 250, 745!!

    Image and video hosting by TinyPicLilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Tons of love and ((hugs)) to my IF sister NMscubagirl


  • I so hate this for you!!! (HUGS)) I hope your house sells quickly for you guys!
    2/11 Diagnosis: DOR-AMH .62, LPD and MFI-4% Morph
    IVF #1-July 2011 7/9/11-Started Stims
    7/20/11-ER:No eggs in 4/5 follicles. Left the 5th follie intact and converted to an IUI
    8/3/11-Beta #1=BFN,
    Nov, 2011 BFP #1=m/c at 7 wks 3 days
    11/11-AMH .47, IVF #2 March 2012...or not!! Surprise BFP on 2/19. Beta #1=161. Beta #2 305 Our little miracle girl is on her way! Due Oct 29, 2012
    <a href="http://s1207.photobucket.com/albums/bb461/andersenspics/?action=view
  • My deepest sympathy for what you have been dealing with this past month.  I wish I could somehow make sense of it all for you.  More than anything, I wish I could make it right with the simple wave of a magic wand.  

    Unfortunately, infertility is brutally unfair and it viscously gets the very best of us at times - a lot of the time.  The only beauty of it all is that we miraculously find a way to pick ourselves up to press forward with the strength in our heart and our bones despite all the pain and frustration and disappointment we have endured.  It isn't easy and it is to be commended. 

    You are so strong and so wise and I know you will seek out the path that will bring some light and joy back into your life.  I wish you all the best with the currently undergoing changes with your living situation.  Continue to do what is therapeutic and comforting and treat yourself with kindness every step of the way.  And, always know that I am rooting for you.  Many hugs and well wishes.  

    Countless BFN(s)
    Moving to IVF

    IVF1 (ICSI): Long Lupron
    6R. 3F. 3DT. 8Cell 1Grade 2Embies. 1Frostie.
    Beta 1/22: 14 Beta 1/24: 24 Beta 1/26: 28
    Round One Result: Chemical Pregnancy

    Pressing Forward

    IVF2 (ICSI/AH/ACU): Microdose Lupron Flare
    13R. 11F. 5DT. 2TFR'ed. 1Frostie.
    Round Two Result 4/30: Harsh BFN

    FET. 2TFR'ed.
    Round Three Result 6/25: BFN
    Where do we go from here?

    Moving forward with CCRM in 2013
    ODWU revealed blocked tube(s). Lap 2/15.
    Bilateral Tubal Ligation. Stage IV Endo.
    Finally some (tough) answers.


    IVF3 (ICSI/CCS): Antagonist with EPP
    13R. We have 3 CCS Normal Embryos!


    Lupron Depot: May 2013 to August 2013
    Long awaited FET on 9/3. 2TFR'ed.
    BFP on FRER 5dp5dt: IN SHOCK!
    Beta1 9/10: 152.7! Beta2 9/12: 378! Beta3 9/14: 1224! 

    1st ultrasound 10/1: TWO beautiful heartbeats!  Overjoyed!

  • ****ticker warning****

     My heart aches for you.  I cannot imagine going through all that you have.  Please know that I think of you all the time and are sending you virtual hugs.  Please be kind to yourself. 

    Me 35, DH 36
    TTC summer 2008
    Diagnose me. DOR, DH perfect
    IUI # 1 6/2010, BFN
    IUI # 2 8/2010, BFN
    IVF # 1 10/2010 Canceled poor response
    IVF 1.2 12/2010 BFP! mc 6 weeks 2 days
    Mental health break for 10 months
    IVF # 2 10/2011 BFN
    IVF # 3 5/2012 BFP! 10 eggs retrieved (best ever)
    7 fertilized transferred 3
    Beta #1 14dpo - 72, Beta #2 17dpo 145 Beta 3 20dpo 521
    First u/s June 15 saw HB 126 bpm missed m/c 7/5/12 10 weeks D&C 7/6/12
    IVF#4 ER 9/30 ET 10/3 Beta 10/16 BFFN. IVF #5 final with o/e. ER 1/21 only 1 retrieved, hoping my lonestar is the one. Beta #1 2/6/13 = 209.... please let this be it! Keep growing lonestar! Beta #2 2/8/13 - 586! , Beta #3 2/10/13 = 1898. First u/s perfect little heart beat at 116 bpm. Measure 6 weeks 1 day. EDD 10/14/13
    3/4/13 measuring right on track beautiful heartbeat 171 bpm, graduated from RE to OB... bittersweet.
    PAIF/SAIF always welcome! Its a girl! 

    Maggie Grace is here!  10/5/13... 8lbs 6 ounces of pure joy!

    TTC#2  No birth control since DD was born.  Getting ready to jump back in the saddle.  Weaning this month. RE
    appt scheduled 5/8.   Here we go again!

    IFV# 6.  10/27  6 retrieved 4 mature 3 fertilized.  2 made it to 3dt 10/30. 1"very pretty 8 cell" and 1 6 cell.  Beta
    11/13.   Please stick embies!!!!  We love you so much already! 11/12/14  POAS, BFP... beta tomorrow!
    11/13 beta #1  924!!!  2nd bet 11/15 1906, one more on 11/17 3rd & final beta 3430.  First u/s 12/5, 7w4d, 2 heartbeats,
    both measuring right on track....2nd u/s... all is well... both beans measuring right on track... released from RE... first
    appointment with MFM 1/5.  Looks like this is really happening!

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  • Thinking of you so often, McIrish!  I hate that you are going through this and wish there was some way that all of us could make it even a little bit better.  I hope that the house sells quickly, and that you and YH are able to make some good travel or other happier plans very soon.  You'll continue to be in our thoughts and we're sending lots of love your way.  Huge (((hugs)))!
    TTC since honeymoon in 9/2010
    Me: 39, Dx DOR (FSH = 10.5, AMH = 0.43, best AFC = 10), AMA
    MH: 37, Dx Obstructive Azoospermia, multiple successful sperm retrieval procedures

    1/2012: IVF/ICSI #1 Antagonist = cancelled d/t poor response to max stims
    2/2012: IVF/ICSI #2 MDLF (4R, 4M, 1F) = BFP, saw heartbeat, missed m/c 9w0d, D&E
    8/2012: IVF/ICSI #3 EPP/MDLF (7R, 2M, 1F) = BFN

    12/2012: (New RE) Operative hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue

    1/2013: IVF/ICSI #4 Low-dose stim/Antagonist (AFC=6); ER=1/26 (5R-couldn't access rt ovary, 5M, 4F), ET=1/29 (trans 3) = BFP!; 2/11 beta#1(13dp3dt)=2127, 2/13=3367; twin girls due 10/19/13

    PAIF/SAIF very welcome!

    <a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Pregnancy"><img src="http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt16bf7d.aspx" alt=" BabyFruit Ticker" border="0"  /></a>
  • I am so sorry McIrish. As usual with this sh!t, words don't convey the depth of feelings adequately. Broken Heart But my heart goes out to you... I so wish that things could have been different for you, I know that this was a scenario you were afraid of ... it isn't something I would wish on a worst enemy, it's unfair and heartbreaking and defies understanding. I second what RPL has said ~ please be kind to yourself, and allow yourself to move through this and ultimately heal however you need to. And I am sending you big strong protective shield vibes because the thoughtlessly unkind things people will say can be breathtaking at times. Sigh... just so very sorry. :'(

  • I wish you peace and happiness as you move forward with your life and all its adventures. There will be a light at the end of the tunnel, just who knows what form it will be in. I wish you the best in your new start in life.
    Me: 37, DH: 38: ttc 7 years, dx: unknown
    10/11: after 2 years, saw a RE, FSH 5.4
    11/11: BFP! (surprise after thyroid & normal hsg),
    12/11: missed m/c after 7 week u/s, 1/12: D&C
    6/12 IUI#1-IUI #3: clomid = BFP!, C/P
    IVF #1(10/12) FSH 5.4, AFC: 16 long Lupron, 5R/5M/4F, all 4 made it to 5dt, 1 blast/1-8 cell transferred=BFN
    IVF #2(12/12)AFC 21, MD lupron, 4R/4M/3F, 5dt of 1 blast and 2-8cell. BFN.
    IVF#3(4/13) Natural start antagon protocol, 12R,11F. one PGS normal at day 6 transfer. BFN.
    IVF#4 (11/13) C.CRM (ODW.U normal 8/13 Still no Diagnosis) EPP/antagonist. ER 13R/7M/6F. Only 1 made it to freeze. Abnormal. Looking into options of DE, Fresh vs frozen.
    10/14 new local RE to look into what's next. CD3 FSH 4.7, AMH 0.9. Met with DE agencies and exploring options for feb/march 2015.
    Surprise natural bfp (4 days before donor is signed). Beta #1 at 9dpo: 51.8, 2nd beta: 195 (25 hours doubling) @11dpo. 3rd beta (12/15): 516 (35 hrs doubling) 4th beta(12/17): 895 (58 hours doubling) 5th beta(12/19): 2120. U/S at 5w0d(12/22): one gestational sac with yolk sac. U/S #2 (6w0d)12/29. One little bean measuring 6w0d with HR 124. 3rd u/s(1/4)7w0d: baby measuring 7w2d. HR 134. 3/30: A/S at MFM went great except for low lying placenta. Verifi results are normal! Team Blue! Please send any positive thoughts our way! EDD:8/24/2015
    Baby Will born 8/18. He's perfect.
  • McIrish, I am hoping that you find peace as you move forward. *hugs* You are a strong, brave woman.

    ************ Signature/Ticker Warning ************
    Me (32) DH (36) - Finding our way to baby #1
    Me: POF/DOR - AMH <0.16, heterozygous c677t MTHFR, insulin resistant and gluten intolerant
    DH: Severe MFI

    12/2/11 - IUI #1- BFN 
    8/1/12 - IVF #1 - Zero response from max stims (600iu intramuscularly)

    My ovaries are just for decoration

    12/6/12 - Adopted five embryos that had been frozen for over ten years!
    2/11/13 - DEmbryo FET #1 Thawed four, sadly two didn't survive. Transferred two beautiful blasts. 
    2/16/13 - First BFP of my life @ 6dp5dt! EDD 10/30/13
    3/27/13 - After beta and u/s hell, no heartbeat ever detected. D&C at 9w1d.

    6/5/13 - Adopted four new embryos that had been frozen for seven years!
     
    9/12/13 - DEmbryo FET #2. Thawed and transferred two beautiful blasts
    9/17/13 - BFP @ 5dp6dt! EDD 05/31/14
    9/29/13 - m/c @ 5w1d. :(

    11/19/13 - DEmbryo FET #3. Thawed and transferred one blast from each batch. Wow!
    11/23/13 - BFP @ 4dp6dt! EDD 8/7/13
    Beta #1 @ 13dp6dt - 522  Beta #2 @ 16dp6dt - 1373 
    6w5d ultrasound showed one perfect baby with a beautiful heartbeat of 134bpm!

    Snowflake baby is a girl! 
    Our beautiful Snowflake girl arrived on July 22, 2014!   
    My embryo adoption blog: Wishing on a Snowflake
     
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  • I have followed your story and I am heart broken for you. I hope the future holds peace and happiness in many forms for you both. Good luck with the move and best in the future. 

    Age: 35 TTC since 2005, MFI & DOR 

    IVF #1 Sep '11 - canceled poor response

     IVF #2 Nov '11  8R/8M/4F 3dt x2 - chemical

    IVF #3 April '12  11R/6M/4F 3dt x2 - m/c

    FET #1 Aug 2012  3dt x2 - BFN

    **new RE**

     IVF #4 Jan '13 BFN 11R/6M/6F 5dt x2 - BFN

     IVF #5 July '13 16R/10M/10F 5dt x2 + 1 frostie

    9dp5dt Beta 1 = 344!! 16dp5dt. Beta 2 = 4822 7wk u/s= 2 heartbeats!

    Twin girls! 3/6/14

     

  • *ticker warning*

    I'm so sorry! 

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  • McIrish, I am so sorry. You have been in my thoughts lately and I am sorry life can be so brutally unfair. I am glad you are at least able to avoid the methotrexate but that is a small consolation for all of this pain. Sending big hugs to you and as always, hoping that there will be many brighter days ahead.
    IUIs #1-3 (1x unmedicated, 2x Clomid) = 2 BFNs, 1 m/c at 7w3d
    IUIs #4-6 (injects) = 3 BFNs
    IVF #1 = BFN
    FET #1 = BFN
    FET #2 = BFN
    IVF #2 = BFP, b/g twins lost at 20w due to partial abruption/PPROM
    IVF #3 = c/p 5w2d
    Long-shot Clomid/Prednisone cycle before next IVF = BFP, our beautiful, healthy girl born 6/26/13!
    ~~
    TTC again March 2014
    FET #3 - May/June 2014
    -
    all embryos arrested before xfer - back to the drawing board...
    IVF #4 - July/August 2014 
    beta 1 (11dp3dt) 220, beta 2 (13dp3dt) 671, beta 3 (19dp3dt) 10762
  • (((big hugs))) I'm so sorry. 
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  • Everyone else said it so much better than I could. You are continually in my T&P; my heart aches for you. Best wishes for a quick sell and that the move helps bring positive things into your life. Please take care of yourself. ((hugs))

    ***signature & ticker warning***


    Me: 30 ~ Stage IV Endo ~ AMH .38 ~ AFC 8
    AMH .97 as of 4/2012! ~ AMH 1.63 as of 4/2013!?!

    Him: 29 ~ perfect swimmers

    Laparotomy w/partial oophorectomy 8/2009 to remove cysts/endo.
    Stopped BCP 4/2010.
    Multiple clomid rounds from 11/2010 to 6/2011. ~ All BFN
    IUI w/clomid 7/2011. IUI w/clomid & injectables 11/2011 & 1/2012. ~ All BFN

    IVF:EPP 5/2012 ~ (4R, 3M, 2F w/ICSI). Both embryos txfrd. ~ BFN
    BCP to manage endo from 10/2012 to 12/2012.
    FET w/donor embryos #1: 10/2013 Cancelled
    FET w/donor embryos #1.2: 11/2013
    ~ ET of 2 beautiful blasts on 11/27.
    Beta 1: 503(12dp5dt) Beta 2: 1035(14dpt) Beta 3: 3001(16dpt)
    Beta 4: 8503(19dpt)
    Twins with an EDD of 8/15/14! Team Purple
    G&B born 6/30/14 at 33w3d via emergency c/s.


    If you're wondering about my avatar...it's a fried pickle chip shaped like a fetus!


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  • I've been thinking of you. I am hoping that these big changes bring you new found joys and experiences and that in time, letting go feels freeing and opens you to opportunities and happiness you never knew.
    BzeetyD = 38, Mr. BzeetyD = 44 together 12/02 married 9/08
    TTC #1 since 1/10
    DX: Unexplained/??? MFI issues

    Our lil' lost sparks:
    5w3d loss 7/30/10 - EDD March 2011
    8w loss 4/15/11 - EDD November 2011
    8w3d loss 8/2/12 - EDD March 2013
    4w c/p loss 10/29/12 - EDD July 2013

    Long story: trying on our own + testing testing testing with 6 rounds of Clomid, more testing, injectables + TI, laparoscopy - one tube blocked, 2 IUIs with Follistim...BFNs.
    RPL testing all normal, Karyotyping normal

    Moving on to IVF.

    IVF #1 April 2012 = BFN, IVF #2 June 2012 = BFP. U/S 7/23 = saw heartbeat but measuring behind. Follow up U/S on 7/30 - no heartbeat. D&C 8/2. Trisomy 12. IVF #3 Oct 2012 = Chemical Pregnancy

    Phone consult with CCRM on 12/12/12 - ODWU 1/4/13 - both tubes clear(!) - AFC 24, AMH 3.2, FSH 9.6, LH 5.4, E2 25. DH has high frag rate but improved!
    IVF #4 March 2013 CCRM. EP protocol w/ Menopur, Gonal-F & Dexamethasone. ER 3/29 & IMSI, PICSI. 43R 13M 10F 6blasts bio'd. CCS testing reveals 3 normals!!!
    FET 5/31/13 of 1 4AA blast - thawed and expanded. 4dp5dt BFP.
    Beta 9dp5dt = 181, 11dp5dt = 427. 1st u/s showed a healthy heartbeat! EDD 2/16/14

    After 4 years of hoping and heartbreak, our sweet little bean was born on 2/19/14
    We are so in love with her.

    "I'm not telling you it's going to be easy, I'm telling you it's going to be worth it."

    Everybody is welcome!!!
  • I wish I had some "magic" words to help ease your pain.  I did want to send you hugs and let you know that I think of you often.  
    Married 8/2008. IVF with PGD March 2013.
    3/22 ER: 25R, 20M, 15F. 9 genetically normal, and 3 survived to Day 5
    3/27 ET: transferred 1 embryo, beta 9dp5dt=163, 12dp5dt=639
    4/25 1st ultrasound at 7 weeks = identical twins with heartbeats?!!!
    PPROM at 31w, delivery at 32 weeks of two beautiful girls
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  • McIrish I am so very sorry for your loss!  I have been MIA myself because of similar situations.  DH & I were getting ready to do IVF last year, but my body started to shut down on me.  I'd always had female issues, but it was becoming unbearable.  After a lifetime of living with extreme pain, DH & I made the decision to move forward with a hysterectomy.  It took months of crying & mourning the loss of what might have been & coming to grips that we would never have the family that we always wanted.

    Just about the time that the pain started getting worse, my sister started working her magic.  My aunt had been raising my cousin's little boy for a year after he was put into foster care when he was 2, but her breast cancer had returned & she was having trouble taking care of him.  He is now 4.  We had never met him before, so we decided that we should at least meet him.  We fell in love with him immediately!  We started taking him on the weekends & then for a week at a time.  He fit into our lives immediately.  We ended up moving him in with us at the beginning of October & have made ourselves into a little family.  We will be moving towards full adoption after the end of March.

    I had my hysterectomy at the beginning of January.  They found 7 cysts in my uterus & on my left ovary.  The doctor said that my uterus was so damaged that I never would've been able to carry a baby to term.  I know that it is easy for other peopel to say "maybe it's for the best" or "something better may be out there".  It took me a while to realize that just because my family didn't come the way that I had always thought that it would, it doesn't make my family less of a family.  You are an amazing woman & have always been such an emotional support for all of the women on this board.  You deserve every happiness in this world.  I wish you peace right now.  If you ever need a shoulder, just PM me.

    ((hugs))

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  • i am so sorry. i hope fresh starts in your career and home bring some lightness. i will always be out there wishing you the best.
    TTC #1 since June 2010
    Me: 36, DH: 42
    Dx: DOR and MFI

    DH: low count + very low motility; hormones all normal; Sperm DNA Frag. test = poor to fair; male karyotyping normal
    Me: FSH 13.4 + AMH 0.26 + hypothyroidism; Scratch the hypothyrodism (?); Blood clotting and immune panel all negative; endometrial biopsy normal

    IVF #1 (MDLF - Jul/Aug 2011): BFN (9R, 5M, 3F with ICSI, 3dt of 1 10-cell grade 2, no frosties)
    IVF #2 (EP-antagonist - Sep/Oct 2011): BFN (6R, 4M, 3F w/ ICSI, 3dt of 1 6-cell, 1 7-cell, grade 4s, no frosties)
    DE IVF #1 (shared cycle - June 2012): c/p (6R, 6F w/ICSI, 3dt 1 8-cell grade A- and 1 7-cell grade A-; no frosties)
    DE IVF #2 (shared cycle with new donor - Nov/Dec/ 2012): - BFP!!!!! 12/14/12. U/S on 12/27 shows twins!!!!!

    SAIFW/PAIFW
  • I just wanted to let you know you're in my thoughts and prayers.  I have moved on from the board and am in a better place than I used to be, but I hear you and I understand.  (((hugs)))  I hope you heal and that the change of scenery agrees with you. 
    My feet and Miss Heidi the rescue mutt!

    image

    15 treatment cycles: four early m/c
    Moving forward with domestic infant adoption!

    Home study approved 5/13, now just waiting...

  • I'm very sorry. As the eternal optimist I am I will tell you I have had several friends with varying issues, one even trying for 7 years and we've all had success at RMA in NJ. Not sure where you live but I rec. them highly.
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