Belly Touching

Jen1029 · February 2013

I'm only a few weeks away from my baby shower and I'm having big anixety about people trying to touch my belly. It's happened a couple of time already and I've instinctively jerked backwards.

I don't want to seem rude or ungrateful. My family is really great, they just aren't great at respecting boundaries.

Any suggestions?

tilsonc · February 2013

People asked if they can touch my belly or if it bothers me....esp at my shower. I don't have any issues with people touching my belly as its all been close friends/family. I might have an issue if it was strangers, but I haven't had any so far.

StarBe · February 2013

I can't imagine someone reaching for your belly with out asking - seems very odd and completely inappropriate.

With my friends and family they all ask even though I tell them it's fine every time and no need to ask... if a stranger asks (or were to reach for my belly) I say no (or pull away) and tell them that I am not feeling well.

Sorry people are putting you through this you have enough going on!

nichhollle · February 2013

I got a silly shirt that said "Hands off". I hated people touching my belly and the shirt helped avoid the conversation and most people thought it was a joke, but werent willing to chance it. I was hands free all night and still had a great time!

mnj05 · February 2013

I've had people at work randomly touch without asking but not at my shower. The only one who did asked before doing it and it was my moms twin that lives in another state and hadn't seen my belly in person.

mamayo26 · February 2013

I feel you. I was the same way. my only suggestion is to keep your hands on your belly, and if you really don't want them to touch you, back away, and politely as possible say that you really don't want anyone touching your stomach.

I had a really hard time during my pregnancy with people doing that. At my cousins twin's b-day party, one of her DH's relatives that I had never met reached out an touched me, I stepped back and then she said "oh do you mind?" I said yes, and then she said the most inappropriate thing I have ever heard "oh, well you know how when you are pregnant your belly becomes public property. [haha]".

EXCUSE ME?

People get weird with pregnant women. It's like they lose all their social graces.

You have to do what you are comfortable with.

TnArichmond · February 2013

Every.time I see a post about this, I'm always the minority. I LOVE allowing people to touch my belly. I don't see what the big deal is. When I was pregnant with my first I worked in cosmetics in a department store and constantly had ladies rubbing my belly and trying to feel movement.

I can't see why it bothers everyone so much. Growing a baby in your belly is an amazing thing, and don't want to be selfish by keeping the wonder all to myself!

jglenn4 · February 2013

TnArichmond:
Every.time I see a post about this, I'm always the minority. I LOVE allowing people to touch my belly. I don't see what the big deal is. When I was pregnant with my first I worked in cosmetics in a department store and constantly had ladies rubbing my belly and trying to feel movement.

I can't see why it bothers everyone so much. Growing a baby in your belly is an amazing thing, and don't want to be selfish by keeping the wonder all to myself!

This. I thought I would be one of those "hands off" pregnant women but I really find the whole thing endearing. I love the fact that everyone is so happy for me. But I also understand other people being put off by it.

MrsRKJ · February 2013

It doesn't bother me too much, as long as it's someone I know. I haven't had any strangers try to touch, but if they did I'd probably freak

Schell2013 · February 2013

TnArichmond:
Every.time I see a post about this, I'm always the minority. I LOVE allowing people to touch my belly. I don't see what the big deal is. When I was pregnant with my first I worked in cosmetics in a department store and constantly had ladies rubbing my belly and trying to feel movement.

I can't see why it bothers everyone so much. Growing a baby in your belly is an amazing thing, and don't want to be selfish by keeping the wonder all to myself!

Schell2013 · February 2013

TnArichmond:

Every.time I see a post about this, I'm always the minority. I LOVE allowing people to touch my belly. I don't see what the big deal is. When I was pregnant with my first I worked in cosmetics in a department store and constantly had ladies rubbing my belly and trying to feel movement.

I can't see why it bothers everyone so much. Growing a baby in your belly is an amazing thing, and don't want to be selfish by keeping the wonder all to myself!

I like it too, yet nobody ever really touches it. Baby was kicking up a storm yesterday and I went to find my friend who works in the same office building as me cause she has never felt a baby kick and she was scared that she was going to break me. I had to tell her that she wasn't going to break me and could push on it, and she will kick you back. She did and to see the look on her face was priceless! I find that people don't ever touch it, even close family, except my mom she loves it.

pinottoparenthood · February 2013

I really don't understand what the big deal is if these are friends and family. Honestly, if you expect them to come to your shower, spend the day celebrating you, and buy gifts for your baby, I don't think it's too much for them to ask to touch your belly a couple times. I understand why you would be apprehensive about strangers, but I REALLY don't understand why someone would freak out so much about family?? I would just relax and go with it.

youllwhisper · February 2013

I wish I had this problem. Family touches, but hesitantly, like they think I won't want them too. Strangers NEVER do. This may be the last time I am pregnant and I am a little sad that I won't have my stomach touched again. I LOVE IT. Doesn't bother me, the more the merrier. People love pregnant woman. Especially women who have had children and will never be pregnant again. They see in you what they have experienced and will never experienced again. They just want a piece of the experience, and a little bit of the memory.

Sarra21 · February 2013

I can totally see how some women just don't want to be touched, especially if they are enormously uncomfortable to begin with and it's just so wrong to suggest that gifts at a baby shower = entitlement to grope the guest of honor. It's not selfish to have a reasonable expectation of personal boundaries and space when you're pregnant. Period.

I generally don't mind my belly being touched by the majority of my friends or family, either, but that easy-going feeling does not extend to certain immediate family members, like my mother and occasionally my MIL, who weird me out with their unwillingness to STOP groping me after a reasonable amount of time (we're talking 5+ minutes here, hands wandering all over), extreme frustration when baby won't move for them and overall too intense "excitement."

MrsMommyofDom · February 2013

Ok...how do i say this? I think people that let strangers touch them is completely inappropriate and they are starving for attention from anyone that will give it. Do their husbands not care that strangers are groping their wives?
I know that growing a baby is a miracle, but that doesnt mean EVERYONE should be involved. Im 32 weeks with DS2 and when people go to touch I just back away and cover up with my coat. Being pregnant is an intimate time that should be between you, your hubby and family. My sister and SIL will just walk up and touch..I jump because they catch me off guard but I still let them. Its your body and dont feel rude to say no or back off. I think asking is more respectful and that gives you a chance to decide. Best of luck and be true to yourself!

happywife2b · February 2013

With my 1st pregnancy I was very protective and it would have bothered me for someone to touch my belly. I must have worn the danger look on my face, tho because no one did.

This time around I feel much more comfortable with myself and the whole process and people are touching my belly left and right. Friends, strangers, everyone. I do not mind it at all, which actually surprised me at first. But like a PP I enjoy the happiness people are directing toward me and my baby.

watuzzigal · February 2013

Hmmm... maybe a good idea would be to buy yourself a My Brest Friend, wrap it, and open it first at the shower. Then, wear it around so there is less belly to touch.

watuzzigal · February 2013

In all seriousness though, I am fairly similar to you, OP, and I am nervous about my shower, as well.

MindyN7 · February 2013

How about wearing a cute prego-tee shirt with Yosimite Sam saying "Back Off!" hahahha... You could actually design something like that on CafePress.com.

AFBTB · February 2013

I love family and friends touching my belly, but definitely can't stand strangers to do it. Even the Dr feeling for the top of my uterus during my appts weirds me out. It's just because I don't really "know" them. But what I don't understand is people comparing somebody touching your baby bump to being "groped". Seriously, it's not like they are grabbing your boobs.

Crequito · February 2013

I hate anyone other than DH touching my belly - even my mother (sadly). It just feels weird! I did prepare for people to touch without asking at my shower though. I threw on a fake smile and if they were touching for too long (more than 5 seconds) I'd say "oh I have to pee" or "I'm gonna get some food - LO is hungry" so I could get away. The majority of my family knows I hate the touching and respected that but there were randoms that wanted to rub me like a Buddha for good luck.

jglenn4 · February 2013

MrsMommyofDom:
Ok...how do i say this? I think people that let strangers touch them is completely inappropriate and they are starving for attention from anyone that will give it. Do their husbands not care that strangers are groping their wives?

Really???

Danyel&Joe · February 2013

nichhollle:
I got a silly shirt that said "Hands off". I hated people touching my belly and the shirt helped avoid the conversation and most people thought it was a joke, but werent willing to chance it. I was hands free all night and still had a great time!

I love this!

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