sex

jmc1110 · February 2013

Not only do I not have a sex drive any longer (I know it still may be the new mom exhaustion) but when we do have sex it actually hurts. Not sure why this is happening. I did not tear, I did not have an epidural. I was all natural with no complications. Can anyone relate or guide me to info on this?

Thank you

name1109 · February 2013

Goodness I hope someone has a good answer. I feel so unattractive because of my low sex drive.

SingleMom31 · February 2013

No advice, but feeling the same way. Now that I don't have super big belly, SO wants to fool around more. Since I haven't cleared by my OB yet, we haven't DTD, but he's anxious to. Honestly I prefer some cuddle time and a chance to sleep...

IUIBaby · February 2013

SingleMom31:
No advice, but feeling the same way. Now that I don't have super big belly, SO wants to fool around more. Since I haven't cleared by my OB yet, we haven't DTD, but he's anxious to. Honestly I prefer some cuddle time and a chance to sleep...

This!

KatyDidlettes · February 2013

All totally normal feelings ladies! Your hormones are off so your sex drive won't be back for a while. Everyone heals differently and breastfeeding can cause a lot of dryness, a good water based lube is a must!

minervacullen · February 2013

I'm almost 9w pp and still haven't dtd. I want to, but I feel soooooo unattractive. I think DH thinks I'm not so hot either. I also think he's waiting for me to initiate so he knows its ok. With DS it hurt pretty bad for a while and that worries me. I think it's just things being moved around and not used.

magnoliablossom00 · February 2013

I think most women have trouble finding their mojo for several months after having a baby, especially if you're breastfeeding (hormone issues).

I don't really understand why lack of an epidural would supposedly effect intimacy levels though. I had a natural birth and also an epidural birth, and there was no difference to my sex drive.

MinaE01 · February 2013

It gets better!

I had a little preemie, with a 1st degree tear and it hurt a lot at first. My OB said warned of possible drive loss and dryness. It gets better every time, though. I highly recommend Astroglide!

letsgox · February 2013

MinaE01:
My OB said warned of possible drive loss and dryness. It gets better every time, though. I highly recommend Astroglide!

This. My OB said that since estrogen is the predominant hormone pp, dryness and libido will be problematic for most. It does get better, though!

ilenegrace · February 2013

After my first LO it took 6-7mos before sex felt "good" again. I'm hoping its much sooner this time.

jo4janet · February 2013

Did you have an episiotomy since you did not tear or you just stretched? For me, I am thinking it was pretty painful at first due to my stitches and that everything inside is starting to heal after the birth. As one of the PP mentioned, definitely use lots of lube at first. Also, I think the hormones have alot to do with the dry feeling and the lack of sex drive. Hopefully it will get better in a couple of months.

Laurakidd88 · February 2013

I had a csection and it still hurt. It's hard to have a drive too because its another person just wanting something from you when your already so exhausted..at least it seems that way to me now! Second time was better

maiatene · February 2013

You're thinking too much about it. Before we dtd I just knew it would hurt bc I had a 2nd degree tear and we hadn't been intimate for abt 5 weeks at that point. Once I relaxed and stopped thinking about how much it would hurt and focused on how much I missed that feeling it was all good. Lubricant helps and keep it simple ie no knees by your ears, but the best advice I can give is get out of you head and enjoy you husband

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