Baby Showers
purpleXdandelion
member
TB thinks showers for baby #2 are ok...
purpleXdandelion
member
in Baby Showers
According to the 3rd paragraph down:
Contrary to what some people think, it is perfectly okay to have a party for baby #2. You do actually need some new stuff (ahem, double stroller). And besides, it?s a good way to see all your loved ones before you?re too busy juggling two tots.
Sorry if this has been posted already. But really?! "Perfectly ok"? As if you can't see your loved ones at any other time besides at a gift-giving event for yourself.
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Re: TB thinks showers for baby #2 are ok...
Duh. This site makes money via advertising for baby gear. If they can convince people a second shower is ok, their advertisers make money, who will buy more ads and make the bump more money.
Why is this a shock to you?
I usually do too, but it's realllly slow at work and TB isn't blocked like facebook is
"And, when the baby is born, ask friends and family who?ll bring gifts to bring one for baby #1, too."
Not only should you have a shower for #2, you should also hit your friends/family up for gifts for #1. Klassy.
I think as far as Emily Post goes the emphasis should be on "invite those that have not attended a shower for a previous child". Also, close family members for some people include cousins and aunts. To me they are mom and sisters and possibly grandmothers. As far as close friends...I take that to mean BEST friend(s). Most people only have one or two BEST friends. Othewise I totally agree with your post. I give a gift once baby is born whether I've been invited to a shower or not. I do think 2nd (or 3rd, 4th, etc) shower are tacky and gift grabby.
This. If someone decides to have a child (1st, 2nd, 3rd, etc), it is the parent(s)' responsibility to provide for that child and no one else's.
The Bump is a business, plain and simple. They want to appeal to their advertisers and their readership.
As we've seen from these boards there's no shortage of expectant mothers who desperately want to believe it's acceptable to have a shower as a second- or third-time Mom.
But before you argue, here's my thoughts...
I don't think it needs to be a "shower".. But I do think every baby should be celebrated..i know that people will want or feel the need you bring a gifteven if I say not to... so I think its a good idea to do a simple theme..like bring a book or a diaper shower.. Then they feel like the didn't come gift less... You get to see family and friends... Plus every kid really could use diapers..
Anyway.. I'm not expecting one for my second but I am throwing one for both my sils with their second..
I'm torn on this.
On the one hand, it's incredibly rude to say that people who have second baby showers shouldn't just because you wouldn't. Or that they're being grabby, greedy, etc. Unless you know them personally and know what their reasons are for having multiple showers and you know that it's because they just want a bunch of new stuff and it has nothing to do with baby #2, then don't judge and assume the best! You wouldn't want people assuming the worst of you so don't assume the worst in them. And maybe it wasn't their idea to throw a second shower? The ladies group at my church hosts small baby showers for every baby, regardless of how many kids the parent already has. Some people just like to celebrate another life on the way and it's more of a social hour than a gift giving hour. And who knows, maybe there is a reason beyond greed for the people that do have a large registry list and are 'asking' for gifts. Maybe something happened and they don't have all the baby stuff they use to have. Maybe baby #2 was a surprise and they had already gotten rid of all/most of their baby things from baby #1 or it's just taken that long to get to baby #2. My parents had to have a whole new baby shower for me because my closest sibling was 6 years older than me and they had gotten rid of most of their baby items by giving them to friends having babies.
That said, people shouldn't rely on baby sites to tell them if they can or cannot have a second shower. If you want one, have one. If you feel torn, ask other moms or even your mom if they think it would be acceptable or what makes a second shower acceptable and what doesn't. But again, some people might be looking online for answers because someone offered to throw a second shower and they don't know if (for face value) they should turn it down or be considerate and thankful and accept the second shower. I hate when people guilt someone into doing or not doing something that they had wanted to participate in or say. It's my number one pet peeve whether it was intentional or not.
Also, if you're having a different gender baby for baby #2 and want to stick with a gender specific theme as opposed to making it as gender neutral as possible, I see nothing wrong with having a real baby shower for that baby for gifts that are gender specific or things that will be needed to deal with two young children at the same time that you don't already have.
BFP#1: 11.22.2012 EDD: 7.22.2013 DS Born 7.24.2013
BFP#2: 11.26.2014 EDD: 7.25.2015 *chemical confirmed 12.08.14*
This!
When I get to #2 eventually and if someone offered I'd opt for an "Eat n Greet" a good old fashion barbecue post-birth to enjoy friends and family as opposed to a shower or sprinkle.
Honestly, every family is different... so etiquette is different for each family as well.
Oh God, this is so wrong on so many levels. Please see my comments.
That would be fine if people didn't include friends, the other side of the family, etc in these family events. Etiquette is NOT different. Some families may choose to ignore it, but there are some things that are always tacky.
i disagree with you, i don't see why you can't have a second baby shower or third or forth. its a different baby and that baby needs stuff too. a baby shower is to shower the MTB, right? if shes preggers with her second baby, she is still a MTBx2. that baby will still need clothes and bottles and blankets. i see nothing wrong.