To Team Green, or NOT to team green?
beezybaby
member
With DD, I really wanted to be team green, but our circumstances made it a bit harder, and DH REALLY wanted to find out. Also, and this is a bit selfish, we figured more people would buy us things if they new what gender it would be...judge away( we aren't gift grabby, just money poor from working on a voluteer basis in a poverty stricken region of the Dominincan Republic for two years now, so sort of desperate!)....Anyway, now with this pregnancy, I thought I wanted to be surprised, argued my case with DH and he said ok even though he would prefer to find out. But I don't know, now I sort of think, what's the point? A ton of suspense, not as many options in gender neutral baby things...?
Any body else on the fence? Or if you are team green, what are your reasons? I feel like I had good reasons last time for not wanting to find out, I just can't remember them anymore!
Re: To Team Green, or NOT to team green?
TTC since 3/12
High LH/FSH Ratio 8/12
DX with PCOS 11/12
Clomid 50mg - 19.5mm Follie - Trigger + TI = BFP! 11/12
EDD August 11, 2013
We are team green. Yes sometimes I think it would be easier if I found out so I could plan better but you know all those cute little outfits will still be around when baby gets here and I can stick with gender neutral til then. Baby doesn't care if her stroller is pink or brown and same with everything else. I just want the excitement of being able to hear the doctor say what it is when she pops out. I found out with my other 2 and I don't know I guess I just want the surprise this time. Truth is, I don't care what color the baby's outfit is because he/she will be just as cute to me.
<a href="http://s22.photobucket.com/albums/b316/Vanessro82/?action=view
I am SO EXCITED about finding out right in the moment. I don't know why, but just thinking about it gets me all fluttery. And my H is so excited about not knowing, so that obviously helps.
This time around I think we'll find out, since our kids are 6 and 4.5, they'll be involved more and interested, so we thought it'd be fun for them to know. I'm sure my DD will want a sister and my DS a brother, so hope finding out early might give them a chance to get used to whether its a girl or boy. Is anyone in this same boat with older siblings having an opinion and possibly disappointment?
Exactly how I feel... Except people are so damn impatient and can't wait until 40 weeks. To each their own indeed.
Is there a boy or girl exclusive store you must shop at? That must be rough.
We are definitely team green. I understand other people wanting to "plan", and normally, I am a MAJOR "planner"; but I want some surprise. Other than that, my reasons are:
1) I hate the color pink. I know that if it's a girl, it is inevitable that she will eventually wear pink, but I enjoy the thought of having other color options. I went to my husband's cousin baby shower last month, she is having twin girls. I swear, I was the only person who bought anything other than pink! YUCK! The room looked like it had been doused in pepto-bismol. No thank you.
2) When people don't know the gender, they are more likely to purchase items you actually need from your registry, rather than buy all kinds of "cutesy" gender specific clothing that you don't really need.
3) If we have more than one child, it will be much easier to re-use gender neutral clothing and supplies. Why buy stuff all over again in a different color?
Just my thoughts.
I think either way you go will be special. I'm not team green - not even for planning reasons but basically because I'm already tired of calling our baby "it" - I want to be able to say he/she and picture my little one more clearly.
Plus I figure it adds another special day for DH and I. I mean the birth and meeting our baby is going to be amazingly special no matter what. I don't think finding out the sex then would make it any more special (for me - maybe for others it would!) Finding out at our 20 week scan will be a day that DH and I always remember and I love those days.
BFP #1 4/10/12 D&C 6/5/12@ 12.5wks EDD 12/17/12
BFP #2 9/10/12 CP 9/19/12@ 5.5wks EDD 5/21/13
BFP# 3 12/3/12...Lukas James born 8/15/13
BFP# 4 8/4/14 EDD 4/13/15
Yes! My DD almost 10yrs want a sister so bad! And so we are going to find out. So if its not she can get use to the idea of it. She is going to be the one to announce it to the family.
We are finding out. Its a surprise whether you choose to find out at the ultrasound, or if you choose to find out at birth.
I want to know because it personally makes me feel more of a bond to the child. Knowing if its a boy or girl, envisioning stuff, its nice. Also, it makes it easier for me to purchase items, or at least put it on a list.
I'm definitely NOT team green but can respect anyone who is. The point above is what I feel is the only downfall of picking Blue or Pink.
My plan is to buy or register for gender neutral BIG items: the stroller, car seat, bassinet, high chair, bouncy seat, etc. Aside from those big items I definitely want to plan ahead, decorate the room, etc.
I think whether you find out at 20 weeks or at 40 when you give birth - it's a surprise one way or the other... just 20 weeks earlier or later
DH & I cannot wait to find out!!
Well I should add that I still have all the gender neutral big items, but as far as clothes and nursery items go I would much prefer not to only buy gender neutral things as there are very limited options. If this is baby is a boy, we will be basically set. If it is a girl, I will want to stalk craigslist and consignment stores for things I still need. I've seen quite a few things that are steals that I would buy if I knew I was having a girl.
I'm not saying it can't be done (See last sentence of my previous post). I'm just saying I'd like the extra time to try to find budget friendly gender specific items.
This. I am a planner and since I do not know now what they are, now or later its going to be surprise either way. I think its more economical for us with twins coming that we find out so we can get what we need x2.
This is exactly how I felt the first time!
I also did not want to be pinked todeath, which is why I registered for neutral things and made it clear to our immediate family that we weren't into pink. We still received some cute pink things and were grateful but it wasn't overwhelming. It's nice now to have a mix of colors. I had enough selfcontrol aside from that to make it clear what we wanted, in case our next child is not a girl. When I bought anything, it was neutral or "boy" clothes to balance it out.
A friend of mine found out and kept it secret from everyone else. We considered that but felt like the baby's name would be the big surprise, in addition to you know, Having the baby.
Izzy and Baby A ~ Adorable Punks
THANK YOU! I have no problem with people wanting to find out, I just can't stand all the stupid excuses. Thank you for saying what the issue actually is - needing to know. Period. Not shopping, not planning. Just impatience. It's ok, we're human.
And the whole "it's a surprise whether you find out at 20 weeks or 40" argument is only ever given by people finding out... just an observation
I couldn't agree more. We didn't find out with DD and won't this time. I never once felt under prepared.
I particularly agree with #2. Out of all of my friends I'm the only who didn't find out, and I'm the only one who received registry only items at my shower. My poor girlfriends were inundated with so many clothes they not only couldn't use half of them, but they had a ton to buy after the shower. They all said they regretted sharing the sex prior to the shower.
DD2 8.22.13
MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18
Ok first of all, I was super excited to see this post get a star, that has never happened to me before!
Thank you for all your friendly input! I am for sure an instant gratification kind of girl, but I am thinking this might be worth the wait. I had not thought of the whole "its either a surprise at 20 weeks or at 40" thing, and that actually makes me lean more towards the waiting. I think maybe we will decide around the time of that 20 week ultra sound whether we will find out or not. If I say for sure now, it will only make me more impatient to know.
So I guess I am team green-ish!
My first 2 I found out, this one I'm really hoping to not find out. I haven't sold my H on this yet, but he'll come around. It's the last one I think so I just want to do something different
I'm also hoping if we don't find out, our family wont bury us in pink or blue clothing.
We did not find out with either of our previous pregnancies. It was originally because we really felt like it was fun to not know and we were just so focused on being healthy and excited. It was awesome for my husband to be able to run out to family & tell them too!
The third time around we are debating on finding out because we have one of each & it would be nice to donate or get rid of some of our things.
We are most definitely Team Green here! Yes, finding out would be special whenever it happens, but I guess we are just old-fashioned. We prefer to think we are traditional. There's no need for us to find out early--not that we aren't dying to know--we are!!! We will be absolutely happy with either, so it just doesn't matter. It's frustrating our family already--which I must say is a bit amusing.
Hopefully, we will have one more in the next few years and want to be able to reuse everything possible--clothes, diapers (we'll be in the cloth camp), decor, furniture, etc. There is no sense wasting money, on a fairly fixed budget, buying these things over in a new color. It's just silly, and to us seems very wasteful. Plus, we would both be really frustrated with a ton of pink or blue clothes--especially tacky ones! Little girls can wear boy clothes much easier than boys can wear girl clothes, so I don't feel limited at all. I also plan to make a lot of baby clothes/supplies, so I'm only limited by my imagination!
It's a personal choice--nothing wrong with finding out early, or waiting. It's a blessing either way! No judgement here...
For us it was never a planning thing...it was just an impatient thing. Pure and simple. I'm pretty sure DH is going to be impatient again.
We were team green, loved it, and are going to wait this time as well, without hesitation.
I'm a huge planner. I planned to have a baby and I was as prepared as I ever could have been. None of my planning was hindered because I didn't know if he had a penis or a vagina. You can buy special clothes and all the pink or blue crap you ever want once they arrive, you have years to do that (usually). It's actually more fun to buy them stuff when they are here and you can act like they care!
I find it sad people think they wouldn't be able to bond if they didn't know... I loved my baby and we called him Nugget. I'm glad we didn't know he was a boy beforehand because I would have felt a smidgen of disappointment and would have been really scared that I wouldn't know what to do with a boy. As it turns out, boys are awesome and I was nothing but ecstatic when he came out and we got to meet him for the first time! Not to mention, we saved $$$ not buying into the plethora of gender-specific items that are of questionable necessity. People got us stuff we asked for and needed and once he was born, they brought us clothes, it was awesome.
Finding out is a surprise, absolutely, but there's no way I could ever say it would be as much of a surprise if we'd found out at 20 weeks. There is just no parallel to that moment. The suspense and mystery that led up to it made it even more intense and joyful than I could have imagined. There's just no comparison to hearing his first cry and my husband yelling "It's a boy, baby! We have a son!" and the huge, happy shock of it because I'd thought for sure he was a girl (sorry buddy).
So yeah, if you have any desire at all to have a little fun with it, give up a little control, like a little mystery and suspense and want a huge surprise at the end, GO FOR IT!!! Believe me, I'm impatient. But I'd be impatient regardless, I just want to meet my baby. Knowing their sex wouldn't help me. The only point you really have to be strong about it is at the ultrasound and the rest of the time, you don't have temptation, so it's fine. It is 110% worth it!
This is our first, but DH and I are definitely headed Team Green. We figure how often in life do you have the opportunity to have a surprise like that! Sometimes I waver and think well maybe we will find out but my husband REALLY wants to wait. I have however made a deal with my sister though so that the doctor will give us the gender in a sealed envelope and I will send it to her because she is a bit type A and wants to be able to buy things/monogram things for the baby.
Also very weird, my in-laws best friends live in CO and have a daughter who lives in the Dominican with her husband and daughter.... I don't know how to send messages on here, obviously I'm pretty new to the bump, but I am pretty sure of all the posts I happened to click on I managed to find someone I know. I do believe you and your DH were at our wedding in Asheville, NC Sept 2010.
that's exactly how I feel about it. The only drawback is if the gender isn't correct at 20 weeks and you have all this stuff for the other gender. I still want to get a lot of gender neutral items for this reason.
I'm terrified to being inundated with pink or blue things.
Interestingly enough, we're Team Green by virtue of green being the color we want for our child, regardless of sex. Honestly, I don't want to know the gender but DH really does. We will probably find out but not tell people until the shower, if at all.
Yep! Thats us! Oh this is too cool! congrats! what is your due date? When are you telling people? I feel like if my parents knew they would have told me, especially with the timing!