Changing baby's name?

monksmama · November 2012

I am seriously debating changing baby's name. It doesn't 'fit' and I really regret not going with my gut.

The paperwork is easy enough, and DH is on board. Am I completely insane?

GWUAlum · November 2012

Doesn't sound insane to me.

WashingtonQueen · November 2012

How old is your kid? What is their name? What do you want the name to be?

Emerald27 · November 2012

Can't see your siggy to know how old LO is, but I say go with your gut! You may have to correct some people who already know the first choice, but that's no big deal.

Guillerma · November 2012

Just out of curiosity- what was the original name and what are you changing it to? Why did you choose the original name? Why the change?

EmarieDuke · November 2012

I honestly thought about it too, but I found after 3 months or so (once you started to see her personality) it really started to flow well and suit my DD more. You picked the name for a reason, but then it would also depend on your reason for wanting to change it.

mscheevus · November 2012

We went and changed DS2's name not long after having him. We didn't have "the name" for him, so we just picked from our current top 2 at the time. It didn't fit him or our family, as in it felt awkward calling him that name if that makes sense?

Obviously I don't think it's insane at all. Especially considering your LO's age.

monksmama · November 2012

We named her Theresa, Tess for a NN. Basically we couldn't agree on anything so we picked Tess in the hospital. The boys are Jack and Sam and I thought it worked. I just don't 'love' it, you know? I now see Theresas all the time and the majority seem to be late middle aged women with few teeth.

She is 9 weeks old and I really want to change it to Annabel with a NN of Annie. I worried about it being too popular so I passed on it and am now kicking myself.

I just feel like an A$$ as we sent out announcements.

oliversmom03 · November 2012

GWUAlum:
Doesn't sound insane to me.

This!

oliversmom03 · November 2012

BTW, i love the name that you are considering changing it to.

GWUAlum · November 2012

I like the change

EmarieDuke · November 2012

monksmama:

We named her Theresa, Tess for a NN. Basically we couldn't agree on anything so we picked Tess in the hospital. The boys are Jack and Sam and I thought it worked. I just don't 'love' it, you know? I now see Theresas all the time and the majority seem to be late middle aged women with few teeth.

She is 9 weeks old and I really want to change it to Annabel with a NN of Annie. I worried about it being too popular so I passed on it and am now kicking myself.

I just feel like an A$$ as we sent out announcements.

I love the name you picked out! I think it probably sounds a bit "old" for a newborn, but I think it is a better name to grow into than Annabel (Annie) (although that is a nice name too) I think Theresa (Tess) actually goes better with your boys too. Do what your gut is telling you to do, but I honestly think that the name will start to suit her as you use it more.

ObLaDi · November 2012

I like both names, but ultimately that's irrelevant.

If your daughter is an Annie, she's an Annie! Go ahead and make it official.

CMSAV · November 2012

I can't relate to regretting DDs name, but it was hard to get used to calling her anything but ' the baby' for quite a while. She totally suits her name now. That said, if you have serious regret, its still early enough that changing it wouldn't be a huge deal.

Elsa1984 · November 2012

When it comes to Theresa, I think of someone older...only because I have two aunts name Theresa. But I don't think of someone older when I see Tess or Tessa as a nickname for it.

If you feel like you should change it, go for it. We were Team Green and didn't have a name until DD was born. But it took months before it felt like her name fit.

However, if both you and your husband are agreeing that something isn't right, I would change it. You may feel dumb, but don't feel that way. If you have a FB, just post on there after picking a new name and explain why....and word will travel to others that her name is Annie. Then there is less people you have to tell.

Laurakat81 · November 2012

I think it's humorous but she's young enough that I see nothing wrong with changing it.

g8trkim · November 2012

CabbageCabbage:
monksmama:

We named her Theresa, Tess for a NN. Basically we couldn't agree on anything so we picked Tess in the hospital. The boys are Jack and Sam and I thought it worked. I just don't 'love' it, you know? I now see Theresas all the time and the majority seem to be late middle aged women with few teeth.

She is 9 weeks old and I really want to change it to Annabel with a NN of Annie. I worried about it being too popular so I passed on it and am now kicking myself.

I just feel like an A$$ as we sent out announcements.

If you've already sent announcements, it isn't as simple as paperwork. All your life, you're going to be those people who changed their baby's name. I know this because my friend's mom changed his name (he had a cousin with the exact same name and it was causing paperwork confusion) People still talk about it.

Honestly, Your daughter is named a lovely name. Your boys probably know it now. It's been announced to friends and family. I'd settle in and keep Tess. Your hormones are all wonky right now and what seems so important may not in a few days or weeks. I say that as someone who has just gone through all this. I hope it doesn't sound patronizing. My hormones were raging for the first 12 weeks.

All of this.

abbieaggie · November 2012

I like both names, my only hesitation would be the announcement thing. Personally, if I sent announcements, I would not change the name. But if you believe you are going to regret the name and DH is on board, then go ahead and change it or you may continue to obsess over it - which is not good. You may want to send a spunky name change note to close family & friends so people are not confused, like we thought she was a Theresa, but turns out she is an Annabel, so we made it official. GL

ETA: love the nn Tess and Tessa

JuneBug86 · November 2012

CabbageCabbage:
monksmama:
We named her Theresa, Tess for a NN. Basically we couldn't agree on anything so we picked Tess in the hospital. The boys are Jack and Sam and I thought it worked. I just don't 'love' it, you know? I now see Theresas all the time and the majority seem to be late middle aged women with few teeth.

She is 9 weeks old and I really want to change it to Annabel with a NN of Annie. I worried about it being too popular so I passed on it and am now kicking myself.

I just feel like an A$$ as we sent out announcements.

If you've already sent announcements, it isn't as simple as paperwork. All your life, you're going to be those people who changed their baby's name. I know this because my friend's mom changed his name (he had a cousin with the exact same name and it was causing paperwork confusion) People still talk about it.
Honestly, Your daughter is named a lovely name. Your boys probably know it now. It's been announced to friends and family. I'd settle in and keep Tess. Your hormones are all wonky right now and what seems so important may not in a few days or weeks. I say that as someone who has just gone through all this. I hope it doesn't sound patronizing. My hormones were raging for the first 12 weeks.

This isn't always true. I know someone who had their baby's name changed when she was an infant. She is now in her 20's and I've known her for 15 years and I only found out her name wasn't her original name about 6 months ago. If the parent's don't allow the story of the original name to follow the child for years, it won't.

shannm · November 2012

CabbageCabbage:
monksmama:
We named her Theresa, Tess for a NN. Basically we couldn't agree on anything so we picked Tess in the hospital. The boys are Jack and Sam and I thought it worked. I just don't 'love' it, you know? I now see Theresas all the time and the majority seem to be late middle aged women with few teeth.

She is 9 weeks old and I really want to change it to Annabel with a NN of Annie. I worried about it being too popular so I passed on it and am now kicking myself.

I just feel like an A$$ as we sent out announcements.

If you've already sent announcements, it isn't as simple as paperwork. All your life, you're going to be those people who changed their baby's name. I know this because my friend's mom changed his name (he had a cousin with the exact same name and it was causing paperwork confusion) People still talk about it.
Honestly, Your daughter is named a lovely name. Your boys probably know it now. It's been announced to friends and family. I'd settle in and keep Tess. Your hormones are all wonky right now and what seems so important may not in a few days or weeks. I say that as someone who has just gone through all this. I hope it doesn't sound patronizing. My hormones were raging for the first 12 weeks.

this.

notkateanymore · November 2012

I wouldn't change the name after you sent out announcements, but that's just me.

orleyl · November 2012

I really like the name Theresa nn Tess. Its ultimately your and dh decision. When I had dd I questioned if I chose the right name but she grew into it. I think babies become their name. I do think its a little strange to change it but its not a big deal. But what if u change it and then decide she seems more like Tess? Call her Annie for a week and see how it feels.

doremi29 · November 2012

CabbageCabbage:
monksmama:

We named her Theresa, Tess for a NN. Basically we couldn't agree on anything so we picked Tess in the hospital. The boys are Jack and Sam and I thought it worked. I just don't 'love' it, you know? I now see Theresas all the time and the majority seem to be late middle aged women with few teeth.

She is 9 weeks old and I really want to change it to Annabel with a NN of Annie. I worried about it being too popular so I passed on it and am now kicking myself.

I just feel like an A$$ as we sent out announcements.

If you've already sent announcements, it isn't as simple as paperwork. All your life, you're going to be those people who changed their baby's name. I know this because my friend's mom changed his name (he had a cousin with the exact same name and it was causing paperwork confusion) People still talk about it.

Honestly, Your daughter is named a lovely name. Your boys probably know it now. It's been announced to friends and family. I'd settle in and keep Tess. Your hormones are all wonky right now and what seems so important may not in a few days or weeks. I say that as someone who has just gone through all this. I hope it doesn't sound patronizing. My hormones were raging for the first 12 weeks.

This was my exact thought when I read OP. I know my emotions were all over the place. I remember looking at DS when he was 1 month old and thinking I already wanted another one Tongue Tied I'm not really the type to worry about what others think, so the fact that you sent the announcements out already wouldn't come into play for me. I think Tess is a great name (Tessa was on an early list of ours).

alohachrissy2 · November 2012

Not insane, but def. never heard of, do whatever you feel is right though. With my son my husband and I named him before my 20 wk U/S (Collin) and the moment he was born and laid on my chest I immed. thought "he's a Ben!!" I told my hubby that he wasn't a Collin, I see Ben in his eyes and he completely ignored me and said that we had decided on Collin, told family members and bought monogrammed stuff so Collin it was....Months passed and I still felt the same way, he's 2 now and I'm finally seeing him as a Collin and glad I didn't change it

ariaforte8 · November 2012

My sister changed her DD's name as an infant after everyone knew her original name. My neice is 13 now and people still bring it up to my sister, and "joke" about it with my neice. She has her own mixed feelings about her name change as well.

I wouldn't change her name after sending announcements, unless you're prepared for people to talk about it forever. You never know how the knowledge and jokes might affect your daughter in the future either.

LadyXaverian · November 2012

My instinct is to say don't change it, but I am biased because I love Theresa nn Tess. I don't think you would be "wrong" to change it- I just don't think I would do it personally at this point.

jburdet1 · November 2012

I do love Theresa nn Tess, but I do feel Annabel/Annie fits better with Jack and Sam. If you and DH feel strongly enough then I would go ahead with the change. I don't feel like the birth announcements are a huge deal like PP'S stated, but I would be sure to resend new birth announcements to each friend and family member with DD's new name.

JLGY · November 2012

Nope, you're not insane at all. I would definitely do it and the sooner the better. Just send out a mass email or a new announcement. I really don't see it being a big deal at all.

Meery82 · November 2012

That's so funny, I have a son name Jack, Annabelle is what I would have named him had he been a girl, and if I have another boy, it very likely will be Sam! If you want to change it, do. You can always send out name change announcements!

austenreader85 · November 2012

CabbageCabbage:
monksmama:
We named her Theresa, Tess for a NN. Basically we couldn't agree on anything so we picked Tess in the hospital. The boys are Jack and Sam and I thought it worked. I just don't 'love' it, you know? I now see Theresas all the time and the majority seem to be late middle aged women with few teeth.

She is 9 weeks old and I really want to change it to Annabel with a NN of Annie. I worried about it being too popular so I passed on it and am now kicking myself.

I just feel like an A$$ as we sent out announcements.

If you've already sent announcements, it isn't as simple as paperwork. All your life, you're going to be those people who changed their baby's name. I know this because my friend's mom changed his name (he had a cousin with the exact same name and it was causing paperwork confusion) People still talk about it.
Honestly, Your daughter is named a lovely name. Your boys probably know it now. It's been announced to friends and family. I'd settle in and keep Tess. Your hormones are all wonky right now and what seems so important may not in a few days or weeks. I say that as someone who has just gone through all this. I hope it doesn't sound patronizing. My hormones were raging for the first 12 weeks.

I agree with this. I really like Annabel nn Annie but Theresa nn Tess is also nice. I think it will be harder to explain to your sons than others and I think as time goes on your expectation of what a Theresa is will change to match what she is. If all else fails she could always be one of those people with a totally unrelated nickname. If you can't get past seeing her as an Annie then you could always call her Annie. I'm not saying that's my favorite route but I think that's better than changing the name at this point.

guilletskichuk · November 2012

I've never named a baby so I can't imagine exactly how you're feeling but I can somewhat relate. I named my cat Lynx when I first got him and it sooo didn't suit him. I agonized over it for DAYS! Ridiculous, really. I mean, he's a cat. No one else but my DH and a few friends even knew that I adopted him and he certainly didn't know his name yet. After a few days of seriously feeling sick to my stomach over it, I changed his name to Theodore Lynx...Theo for short. Best decision I could have made.

If you really don't feel that it's her name, I would change it. She's only a few months old. It's not that big of a deal. You can send out new announcements and spread the word that way (I agree, with a joking theme to them). Hopefully the story of her name change doesn't follow her through life. Like a PP mentioned, you can prevent that from happening by not mentioning it within your own immediate family and you can put the kibosh on it if others mention it over the next few years. It will likely be forgotten.

Neither Theresa or Annabel are my style...but I really do like Tess and Tessa. Don't let us make the decision for you though. If you feel that she is an Annabel/Annie, go for it!

sugar212 · November 2012

I have wanted to change my daughter's middle name for a long time, but we never did it because it was on everything before she was even born. Her name is Shayla Elyzabeth and I hate the was they run together and I hate that I pronounce it Ah-liz-a-beth and my DH always says E-liz-a-beth. We have had arguments over it. I want to change it to Maysie because she was born in may, both of my grandmas's middle name is Mae/May and my maiden name is Sie (C). She is 2 1/2 now so its not happening, but I have had these debates with myself since she was about a week old. Everyone loves her name as it is (including DH, one main reason it wasn't changed right away) except me.

kerribear1717 · November 2012

I know this sounds weird but I had a co-worker that her DD was like 10 and her name was Christina. Well she told me she never really liked the name but her ex pushed for it. So basically she called her DD Sky from when she was born. That was just her nn for her. Had nothing to do with her real name. You could always do something like that.

FWIW I like your DD's name and see it as very under used now. And Tess is a very cute nn.

GL in deciding.

Zimger · November 2012

I'll be honest. I don't agree with it but you have to do what you think best.

When we named DS we had a few other names that we really liked and when he was born he even looked like he fit one of them really well but I never considered changing his name. His given name suits him very well.

SpruceGrouse · November 2012

Better to do it sooner than later if that is what you feel is right.

brookelynpaisley · November 2012

What if you did something slightly less drastic, like changing whatever middle name she has or adding Annabel. Theresa Annabel. It would be far less confusing for anyone if you simply explained she goes by a NN of her MN. Not my personal favorite option, but certainly not unheard of, and it would probably spare you a lot of the perpetual talk that may come with changing her FN at this point.

chibride4 · November 2012

sugar212:
I have wanted to change my daughter's middle name for a long time, but we never did it because it was on everything before she was even born. Her name is Shayla Elyzabeth and I hate the was they run together and I hate that I pronounce it Ahlizabeth and my DH always says Elizabeth. We have had arguments over it. I want to change it to Maysie because she was born in may, both of my grandmas's middle name is Mae/May and my maiden name is Sie C. She is 2 1/2 now so its not happening, but I have had these debates with myself since she was about a week old. Everyone loves her name as it is including DH, one main reason it wasn't changed right away except me.nbsp;

I, too, wanted to change DS2's middle name for the longest time. Hardly anybody outside immediate family knows it, so it wouldn't have been a big deal. By the time DH finally agreed to it, DS was 9 months old and, crazily enough, we couldn't find anything we both liked more. So, his name stayed as is.

In your situation, however, I totally think that you should follow your gut and change it. Who cares that announcements already went out and some people might tease you about it? Laugh it off. I'd just send a good natured name change announcement after it's official, saying "We had a change of heart and it turns out that Theresa is really an Annabel." You can even include a photo of DD wearing a personalized shirt with a red circle and line through "Theresa."

If you don't change it, there's a good chance that you'll always regret it. Don't do that to yourself... or to her. Good luck!

kim1989 · November 2012

I don't think it's insane, but if your going to change it, it's better to do it sooner rather than later. I like the new name you want to change it to, very cute.

BLPL101 · November 2012

I wouldn't change it, but that's just me. People will talk about it forever.

pamiva1 · November 2012

abbieaggie:
I like both names, my only hesitation would be the announcement thing. Personally, if I sent announcements, I would not change the name. But if you believe you are going to regret the name and DH is on board, then go ahead and change it or you may continue to obsess over it - which is not good. You may want to send a spunky name change note to close family & friends so people are not confused, like we thought she was a Theresa, but turns out she is an Annabel, so we made it official. GL
ETA: love the nn Tess and Tessa

I agree! Change her name if you feel it's right, but find a fun way to resell everyone!

Changing baby's name?

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