December 2012 Moms
STMs Expecting 2(or more)u2
What are STMs expecting 2u2 doing to prepare the other kid(s)? What have others done in the past?
We haven't done much other than showing them the u/s pics and saying baby, pointing to my belly and saying baby, and telling them they are going to be big sisters. I haven't really looked into books, but I am not sure at 1.5 they are going to comprehend what the book is telling them.
I have bought Big Sis / Little Sis shirst as a gift exchange and plan to make Big Sis bags for the girls to give at the hosptial, but I feel like I should be doing something more to prepare them.
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Re: STMs Expecting 2(or more)u2
Maybe also acquaint them with where Baby is going to sleep and what are some of her things..... (DD is just over 2, and we haven't done the books either because she just won't get it either....). Also get them to help out as much as they are capable of when Baby arrives - getting diapers, or whatever, so they're part of taking care of Baby.
Good luck!
Best wishes to you! You have a busy year ahead of you. And a lot of fun as well!!!
My DS was 15 months when DD was born, and he had no idea what was happening. but within a week, he had adjusted to a new normal. I think we just talked about the new baby, but he didn't seem to get it at all. We never read any books and we didn't get him a gift from the new baby, and when he arrived in the hospital room, I was holding DD - totally opposite from anything that people tell you to do. But he was just fine. I think he was so young it was easier! He loved his sister from the beginning - he only said 3 words when she arrived, but within a week, he was calling her by a shortened version of her name. We never had jealousy or anything.
This time, my DD will be 2.5 and DS will be almost 4. I am getting them big sibling gifts that they want from the baby, and we talk about having a new baby all the time. We talk about them helping mommy by getting the baby's binkie, getting the diapers for changes, etc. I am so much more nervous this time since they actually know what is going on!
DD1 will be about 23 months old when DD2 is born. We've talked with her, and gave her a baby doll to "take care of" just like mommy. she kisses my belly and we talk about having a baby sister here soon.... she has a new cousin that's just a few months old, so we've been taking her around him, and there's babies at daycare she interacts with..... but honestly i'm not sure she gets that there's going to be a baby around that she's going to have to share our attention with.
i've set up our pack n play in DDs room, so she gets used to sharing it with DD2 until the crib gets set up. I've also bought a few "big sister/little sister" tshirts for them to wear in the hospital/right after. and I've bought a backpack & a few things for DD2 to "give" DD1 for 1) DD1 to play with while I'm in labor & 2) so DD1 gets a gift and hopefully will be excited.
We won't fall in the 2u2 club, as DD will be about 28 months old when DD2 arrives, but she is still in the age bracket in which she doesn't fully understand what is coming.
That being said, since she is a bit older than your LO, we have been trying to explain things a little more, more than just "baby in mom's belly" type of thing. We read the "I'm a big sister" book by Joanna Cole and she really likes it. Don't think she understands though. We talk about how these clothes or shoes are for DD2.
She will still lift up her shirt, pat her belly and say baby though.
thanks.
Anyway, we've been majorly stepping up playing with dolls. DD has a whole nursery set up for her dolls and she feeds them and changes them and gives them baths. We tell her those are her babies and try to tell her that I'm going to have another baby too. She doesn't understand but she does touch and kiss my tummy and say baby. She also looks at her tummy and says baby.
I'm really not too worried, DD is pretty easy going. She is used to getting our full time attention, but she can also occupy herself sometimes too. It'll be interesting!
I know some places offer "sibling classes"... We aren't doing them but its something you could look into.
Missed Miscarriage discovered at 9w6d
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I'll love you forever Baby Speck
We have been trying to be in situations with her where my husband, her grandma or I am holding another baby or animal. She used to get insanely jealous. It even got to the point that my husband couldn't hug me in front of her without her bursting into tears. She's getting better about all that with time.
I've been renting books out at the library that help young kids see what happens when a new baby is brought home. I think it has been helping.
At our midwife appt today, she didn't freak out. This is rare. I prepared her last night for what we were going to do today, since I had no back-up today and had to take her with me. She was nervous and shy, but OK. She listened to the heartbeat, which she more or less understood from playing with a toy stethoscope. And then when I was buckling her in the car, she ever so gently put her hand on my belly, kept it there, and said, "hi, baby." She has said this before, but not spontaneously. It was more of a game before, and everyone had a baby in their belly. There was something quiet and serious about the way she said it and was looking at my belly. I just let her touch me, stroked her hair and told her what a great big sister she was going to be.
Mine will be about 25 months apart so not 2u2 but close. I don't know how much DS understands but we have read a few books about babies from the library. We have talked about the baby in my belly.
My sister has 4 kids and she really recommended setting up things for the baby ahead so that your kids get used to them. We brought up the swing and I've turned it on a few times and told DS it is for the baby if she is sad it will help her stop crying. He now goes over to it and says baby, baby swing. I also let him help put away the clothes in her drawer he wasn't interested for long and insisted all the pink tiny sleepers were his, but it did open up a conversation about how they wouldn't fit him and they were his baby sister. We are putting the car seat in this week and will also talk about how the baby will sit there. I don't know how much registers now but I figure it can't hurt.
Thanks for the tips and ideas ladies. We moved the girls to their new room (out of the nursery) a few weeks ago. And they seem to be doing really well with it. I have started bringing out baby stuff as well. I am debating between having them visit at the hospital and not worrying about coordinating that.
Any thoughts on that?
Are you have a c-section or natural birth?
With my last birth, it was c-section during the H1N1 scare, so no children under 12 were permitted at the hospital. At the time my older daughter was just under 22 months old, and have never been away from me for more than 24 hours. Getting to the hospital for that delivery, I initially felt so bad and guilty. However, I think it almost was better she didn't come to the hospital and see me. She went on her day as usual w/DH, and then my parents, sister, MIL, etc... She asked for me, but was okay.
By the time I came home w/her new little sister she was happy to see me and basically was just curious about her new sister.
I think if I had a LO as young, I'd do the same. This time around however, my girls are nearly 3 and 4.5 so I think they'll "get" it more and there won't be any issues w/separation anxiety when they have to leave.
Good luck!