Really want my mom to like it :(

Perrin024 · October 2012

My husband and I decided if it is a girl her name will be Elliot or Elliotte (not sure on spelling) But my mom feels lukewarm about it, I've never really cared what anyone thinks about my life, even when I picked my wedding dress I didn't care what my mom thought about it. But this, I really want her to like it. And I don't like anything better than Elliot.

Do others feel this way and what did you do?

panacea05 · October 2012

My MIL hates our boy name. HAAAATES it. Her response was, "Arlo?? What kind of made up name is that??? I pray you have a girl because if you name a boy Arlo, he'll spend his whole life being picked on!!!"

It does bother me that she hates the name... but not enough for me to consider coming up with an alternative. I love the name, and it's not her baby.

BlueRidge8 · October 2012

Not to be harsh, but I kinda see where she's coming from.

TheWop · October 2012

What doesn't she like about the name? Elliot is traditionally a boy name (which I'm sure you already know), so maybe she's worried about her granddaughter growing up with a boy's name.

strawberrytree · October 2012

When you choose a male name for a female child, don't expect everyone to love it. Maybe she's worried her granddaughter will frequently be mistaken for a boy, which is a valid concern. I guarantee she won't be the first to have negative things to say about the name, either to your face or behind your back. If you can't handle that, choose a less controversial name.

plutoisaplanet · October 2012

My personal feelings about the name Elliot aside, you have to make a decision about how much input you're going to allow your mother to have in naming your child. If you decide not to go with Elliot, what happens if she doesn't like your next choice? Or if she's only lukewarm on it?

My point is that this is your child, so the final decision about the name of this child should be yours and your husbands, not your mothers.

Good luck.

Zimger · October 2012

I don't care for boy names on girls. I love the name Elliott (for a boy).

That aside you have to do what you think is best. It is your child.

Mmm79 · October 2012

I understand your desire for your mom's approval, but try to remember that this is your baby (not your mom's). She already got the chance to name her children. You can't please everyone and I bet once your LO is here, your mom will fall so in love that she'll come around to the name.

Bottom line, if you have your heart set on this name for your daughter, then go with it. If you just like it a lot, but have other ideas, maybe go with one of them.

FWIW, I actually think Elliot is really cute- for a girl or a boy.

Mmm79 · October 2012

KaPete08:
To the OP, I'm in the opposite situation. My mom is begging me to name my daughter Elliot, but I just can't do it. I always said I would name my first son Milo and my mom said it was a terrible name for a person. So, I named my dog Milo and have always help a little grudge about not using it for my son. It's your child. Most likely, your mom will end up loving the name once she has a Granddaughter to associate the name with. If not, she can always use a nickname.

Good point. Ellie would be a cute nickname.

LaineyPaney · October 2012

Our girl pick is Eliette.
:

Whatever name you choose will probably grow on your mom.

NicoleRich105 · October 2012

plutoisaplanet:
My personal feelings about the name Elliot aside, you have to make a decision about how much input you're going to allow your mother to have in naming your child. If you decide not to go with Elliot, what happens if she doesn't like your next choice? Or if she's only lukewarm on it?
My point is that this is your child, so the final decision about the name of this child should be yours and your husbands, not your mothers.
Good luck.

Agreed. If your mother's concerns about the name stem from it being traditionally a male gender name, then her concerns are valid, and I agree with her. I don't like the name Elliot or Elliotte, for a girl. But this is yours and your DH's child, not hers.

Eaky77 · October 2012

Reason #293028485 we are not sharing our baby's name with anyone. We love it, that's all that matters. When we hand over the baby, and say, meet your grandson Oliver, they can say nothing about it, the name is already on the certificate.

Name your child what you want to name your child. Next time she, or anyone else carries a baby for 9 months.... they can name it!

StarBe · October 2012

My mothers name is Elliot and she grew up hating it... I personally love Elliot for a girl... I always wanted to name my daughter Elliot and call her Elly or El Smile

Sorry if this doesn't help just wanted to let you know how my mom felt about it since its her name!

ETA: the part she hated most was getting mail for Mr. Elliot Lastname so I get it but I still think it's beautiful for a girl.

eyris · October 2012

I LOVE Elliot.

Love love love love love.

I know everyone around here hates traditionally "boy" names on girls, but I love it so much I would use it on either gender.

Tell your mom she can call her "Ellie" if it makes her feel better.

I would name my first born Elliot no matter boy or girl, but DH has vetoed it. =(

eyris · October 2012

StarBe:
My mothers name is Elliot and she grew up hating it... I personally love Elliot for a girl... I always wanted to name my daughter Elliot and call her Elly or El
Sorry if this doesn't help just wanted to let you know how my mom felt about it since its her name!
ETA: the part she hated most was getting mail for Mr. Elliot Lastname so I get it but I still think it's beautiful for a girl.

We have a close friend named "Paige." Paige is a man. He has the same problem getting mail addressed to "Mrs. Paige _____." Also, sometimes people assume his wife is a lesbian.

GeraldoRivera · October 2012

Eaky77:
Reason #293028485 we are not sharing our baby's name with anyone. We love it, that's all that matters. When we hand over the baby, and say, meet your grandson Oliver, they can say nothing about it, the name is already on the certificate.

I don't get this. You'd just prefer that they make fun of the name or talk about how much they hate the name behind your back? Because hiding the name until after he's born isn't going to change their opinion on it.

I have a relative who named her child something awful (an unusual name). They didn't tell anyone the name until after baby was born and named because they "didn't want to hear negative opinions." And then after it was on the birth certificate, someone told them *why* everyone hated the name - because it was a well-known serial killer's name that they apparently hadn't heard of (or it didn't occur to them when they were deciding on names). But by then it was too late. Now this poor kid has to live with this terrible name.

Sometimes there's a good reason that everyone hates your baby name.

Eaky77 · October 2012

GeraldoRivera:
Eaky77:
Reason #293028485 we are not sharing our baby's name with anyone. We love it, that's all that matters. When we hand over the baby, and say, meet your grandson Oliver, they can say nothing about it, the name is already on the certificate.
I don't get this. You'd just prefer that they make fun of the name or talk about how much they hate the name behind your back? Because hiding the name until after he's born isn't going to change their opinion on it.
I have a relative who named her child something awful (an unusual name). They didn't tell anyone the name until after baby was born and named because they "didn't want to hear negative opinions." And then after it was on the birth certificate, someone told them *why* everyone hated the name - because it was a well-known serial killer's name that they apparently hadn't heard of (or it didn't occur to them when they were deciding on names). But by then it was too late. Now this poor kid has to live with this terrible name.
Sometimes there's a good reason that everyone hates your baby name.

Because its OUR kid, no one else. I could care less what anyone thinks about it. I googled the name after we came up with it, and there were no hits. Its not an off the wall name. If someone has a problem with it, then that's their problem not mine. They can go ahead and talk about the name behind my back. Doesn't bother me one bit. Its a name we chose, and love.... if they don't tough.

Elsa1984 · October 2012

I agree about sharing on the Bump but not in real life. Ladies on the bump will let you know if you are about to name your baby after a murderer. We were Team Green and weren't going to tell anyone the names. If someone asked, we would say we had no idea but were open to suggestions . Then the person felt like they have their input , but we would just ignore. I don't know how many times I heard Olivia, Savannah, Owen, Garrett, etc....all names that weren't our taste at all. But people like to give their input, I would rather they give their input by saying names instead if their input bashing what was on our list. I ended up slipping and telling a few people our top contender on our girls list. Most hated it. But one if my friends that hated it, had McKinley picked out for her kid so that goes to show we have different naming styles. My mom also hated my LO's name....and then started telling others about it. I instantly regret saying anything to anyone. It was hard enough coming up with a name with SO. If she would have been a boy, the top contender was Oskar....his grandpa's middle name. She ended up with that top name, and nobody bashed it after she was born....or if they did, it was behind our back. Her name is Greta Vivian. One day we were all sitting around when someone asked what her name would have been if she was a boy and I said "Most likely Oskar" and instantly everyone started talking about how awful it was. Nobody let me get a word on edgewise to say he would have been named after SO's grandpa. But the people saying it have kids with names that I think are really common and boring. So don't tell anyone, unless you want to hear thousands of comments.

For what it's worth, I like Elliot for a boy or girl. My cousin has an Ellyott and she goes by both Elly and Ellyott. When the baby is actually born, your mom will get over the name. She named her kids, you need to name your kids.

mom2be0513 · October 2012

Although I am a person who does not care what people say once I have made my decision, I am going to say I am with your mom on this one Elliot is a boys name and no matter how you dress it with a e on the end it will still be a boys name.

amb04006 · October 2012

How do you feel about Ellie? It's clearly a girl's name, but still very similar. I'm lukewarm about Elliott for a girl, but I can see why the older generation wouldn't like it.

TarHeels&Rebels · October 2012

I know a beautiful, elegant woman in her 60s named Elyette. I've always thought Elliott on Scrubs suited the character and actress. The name doesn't bother me and if you like it, use it.

LindsayDesigner · October 2012

panacea05:
My MIL hates our boy name. HAAAATES it. Her response was, "Arlo?? What kind of made up name is that??? I pray you have a girl because if you name a boy Arlo, he'll spend his whole life being picked on!!!"

It is a legit name. My great uncle has that name and my brother in law was trying to convince my sister to name their son Arlo.

Perrin024 · October 2012

I guess on anyone re reading my post, I didn't ask anyone's opinion on the name, just if they had been in the same situation and what they did about it. I don't care is Sally Sue from Bangkok likes or dislikes the name Elliot.

queenbone · October 2012

No one I know is dumb enough to tell me a negative opinion about a name to my face. But we tend to not share name in advance much. And when I do hear things after the fact it doesn't bother me because I know that my DH and I are happy with our decision.

You do not have to please your mother. This probably won't be the last parenting decision you make with which she will disagree. Maybe you need to have a conversation with her letting her know that she needs to respect your decisions and keep her negative comments to herself.

If you are looking for input on the name from us, I agree with your mom. I see nothing feminine or cute about Elliot, or any misspelling of it, for a girl,

Worcbride · October 2012

Eaky77:
GeraldoRivera:
Eaky77:
Reason #293028485 we are not sharing our baby's name with anyone. We love it, that's all that matters. When we hand over the baby, and say, meet your grandson Oliver, they can say nothing about it, the name is already on the certificate.
I don't get this. You'd just prefer that they make fun of the name or talk about how much they hate the name behind your back? Because hiding the name until after he's born isn't going to change their opinion on it.
I have a relative who named her child something awful (an unusual name). They didn't tell anyone the name until after baby was born and named because they "didn't want to hear negative opinions." And then after it was on the birth certificate, someone told them *why* everyone hated the name - because it was a well-known serial killer's name that they apparently hadn't heard of (or it didn't occur to them when they were deciding on names). But by then it was too late. Now this poor kid has to live with this terrible name.
Sometimes there's a good reason that everyone hates your baby name.

Because its OUR kid, no one else. I could care less what anyone thinks about it. I googled the name after we came up with it, and there were no hits. Its not an off the wall name. If someone has a problem with it, then that's their problem not mine. They can go ahead and talk about the name behind my back. Doesn't bother me one bit. Its a name we chose, and love.... if they don't tough.

but it must bother you cuz otherwise why wouldnt you tell them now? your reasoning makes no sense

222my · October 2012

I'm not commenting on the name because as you said, you don't care what anyone but your mom thinks. Why is her approval so important to you on this? Do you think she won't love your dd if she doesn't like her name? You're going to have to chose between this name you're set on and moms acceptance. Because you can't force someone to like something. Just my opinion.

Eaky77 · October 2012

Worcbride:
Eaky77:
GeraldoRivera:
Eaky77:
Reason #293028485 we are not sharing our baby's name with anyone. We love it, that's all that matters. When we hand over the baby, and say, meet your grandson Oliver, they can say nothing about it, the name is already on the certificate.
I don't get this. You'd just prefer that they make fun of the name or talk about how much they hate the name behind your back? Because hiding the name until after he's born isn't going to change their opinion on it.
I have a relative who named her child something awful (an unusual name). They didn't tell anyone the name until after baby was born and named because they "didn't want to hear negative opinions." And then after it was on the birth certificate, someone told them *why* everyone hated the name - because it was a well-known serial killer's name that they apparently hadn't heard of (or it didn't occur to them when they were deciding on names). But by then it was too late. Now this poor kid has to live with this terrible name.
Sometimes there's a good reason that everyone hates your baby name.

Because its OUR kid, no one else. I could care less what anyone thinks about it. I googled the name after we came up with it, and there were no hits. Its not an off the wall name. If someone has a problem with it, then that's their problem not mine. They can go ahead and talk about the name behind my back. Doesn't bother me one bit. Its a name we chose, and love.... if they don't tough.
but it must bother you cuz otherwise why wouldnt you tell them now? your reasoning makes no sense

Nope, doesn't bother me at all. I also would like it to be a surprise to them, as the middle name is my fathers name. And I am not telling them, because I like to have something special between my husband and I. We know the name, we get to call him by name, no one else does. Years ago, people didn't know the sex of the baby, so it was a surprise to everyone. I find this almost as the same thing. Just a little special "bonding" time between my husband, myself, and our son. Funny, others are saying they don't share names either, yet I am the only one being called out for it. LOL. Do what's right for your family, and I will do what's right for mine

Really want my mom to like it :(

Re: Really want my mom to like it :(

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