November 2012 Moms
Taking a newborn to the holidays?
I am due a week before Thanksgiving, and I'm wondering, if she comes on time, is it safe/advisable to take her to big family gatherings (Thanksgiving and/or Christmas)?
What are your plans?
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Re: Taking a newborn to the holidays?
I haven't decided yet. I'm kind of concerned about the chaos that is my family and how well my newborn will handle that shenanigans. It's busy and noisy and theres a mazillion people.
I'm due the week before thanksgiving, and If I haven't had the baby yet, we'll probably stick with DH's family because they gather the closest to our house and our birth center. If I have had the baby, it'll depend on who's around for Thanksgiving and how I'm feeling. We might skip it, or go wherever things will be quieter. Our typical Christmas is spent bouncing from family to family and I'm pretty sure I'm not doing that again. I think we might stay home and have people come see us, but if nobody wants to, I don't want to spend the day alone either.
Anyone know how long they suggest you wait before you take your child out around big groups? I don't know anything about that at all...
I'm due nov 11. We live next door to my parents so holidays on my side is no prob, however DH dad is 6hrs and his mom 10hrs away. If they want to see the baby they will have to come to me for both thanksgiving and Christmas. I'm not taking my baby out in winter weather for 6+ hr drive on a good day!
Also if the family is sick I might not go just to keep my baby healthy. No need to risk it!!
Baby is due a week before Thanksgiving, so I'll probably just have my parents and sister over for dinner (my mom and sis will cook) and then have DH's family over for pizza on the Friday. If the baby comes 2 weeks or more early, then we might go to DH's family for Thanksgiving.
My first was born three weeks before Thanksgiving and we did travel an hour. It was our first big trip out of the house, and although I was worried about it, being out and around other people, was soooooooooooo good for my sanity. Both my family and DH's family are really supportive of breastfeeding though, and gave me a room to sit in and nurse the baby in peace, away from the holiday chaos, so that is something you may want to consider.
DS was born 12/22 and I came home from the hospital Christmas Eve. We felt kind of weird sitting at home by ourselves (especially since he came 3 weeks early, so we totally thought we'd be fine travelling for the holiday) so we did decide to drive 1 hour to my parents house for Christmas Day. It was an uncomfortable drive, but bearable and DS did fine. He slept a ton and I just left the room to nurse since I was still figuring it out. My family is more reserved and laid back so it was relatively relaxing.
However, because that went so well we decided to join DH's family the next day, which was a 1 1/2 hour drive and that was rough on me. By then I was feeling PP emotional and his family is much more loud. One of my SIL's was constantly wanting to hold him, but I was at a point where I just wanted to hold him and felt like the bad guy if I told her no. Plus, IL's house is much smaller and more cluttered than my parent's house, so it all felt very suffocating to me.
This time around, we're not making any plans. If she comes 3 weeks early like DS did, we will probably go to his IL's house, but if she hasn't come we are definitely staying home. If it's somewhere in between, we'll just see how I feel. I don't feel like I need to be around family on Thanksgiving as much as I do on Christmas. Plus we have some friends who we can probably hang out with in town that day if we wanted.
He's due a little before Thanksgiving, so that will just depend on when he actually comes and if I'm up to it. It's a smaller gathering at my uncle's house about a half an hour away, and I know no one would fault me for missing it (and feel pretty confident that my uncle would send a plate back for me with my parents, ha!).
Christmas Eve is smallish too at my parents' house. We'll do that and take him to church for the night service. Christmas Day is at my in-laws, and it is huge mass chaos of about 50 people. I will be wearing him in the Moby most of that time. Both sets of our parents live less than 15 minutes away, though, so that will be good.
On my in-laws' side, they typically meet up with family 3.5 hours away and 4 hours away (if they go halfway and meet in a restaurant, or 7 hours away if they go all the way) a few weeks before Christmas. I told my DH I didn't want LO going on either of those trips. I see no point in putting my LO in a car that long for a one day round when we only visit with those people for 2-3 hours, and he'll only be a few weeks old and breastfeeding (hopefully). I am sure this will piss off my mother-in-law, who'll want to show him off, and possibly my grandmother-in-law, but tough noogies. He's my kid, and I'm not budging.
We live 20 hours away from any family, and even if we lived in the same state I am sure that we would be staying home. Boy is due on the 20, what is that 2 days before thanksgiving?
It will be flu season, so keep that in mind.
? Voted Cool Cat ~ 2012 Sweetpea Mom Awards ?
I'm a little concerned about having the baby around all those people, but I'm going to play it by ear. I can always put the baby in another room and refuse to pass LO around. I have no problem being the bad guy.
However, when I'm recovering I act like a sick animal: I crawl under a bed and refuse to let anyone near me. So the final decision will be made based on how I'm feeling and how far along I am during the recovery process. If I still have a significant amount of healing to do I won't be going around people.
I am due Nov 12 - my family all lives a plane ride away. They will all be here for Thanksgiving (all staying in nearby hotels) - my two sisters and BIL's, plus my parents. My spouse has a 10 yr old son from a previous that will be in attendance, and my family is pretty laid back - my mom and sisters will cook. I also feel like our house is laid out in a way that if I need to get away from everyone with LO, I can easily do so.
Christmas - the in-laws live 6 hours away, and initially I thought I would do it, now we are having his parents come to us. They tend to have more of a "party" type atmosphere there - he has three siblings - and I just don't know if I will be up to it.
I would say in addition to travel time, factor in what the environment will be like - if you know you will want at least some alone time, does the house provide a place for some privacy?
yes, this would be my biggest fear, bringing a newborn around sick ppl. just make sure they are using hand sanitizer before touching the baby and Id keep your infant out of the reach of small children
I know, that was my first thought, however they are being so bosy! They even at first wanted us to RIDE down in a rented van with 15 people
I put my foot down with that and I thought I had made it perfectly clear about even going at all... they cancel their reservations on campus and basically got the house off campus so I can "sit there while they go to the parks". Sounds like a GREAT vacation.... I could do that at home!