Normal? Or not?

NicoleN82 · July 2012

I see a lot of posts on here every day about worries going into ultra-sounds that something may be wrong even though there have been no signs or symptoms anything might be wrong.

I find that I am not quite along that way of thinking. I have heard people say that whatever happens is beyond my control, so I feel that I have this drilled into my head. I am almost forcing myself not to worry, as I think "well, whatever happens happens, and I can't change it", which makes me almost....detached, if that is the right word.

Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled about this LO, and it was completely planned. I just feel like my mind says "don't worry! no point in worrying about anything you can't control!". I am just enjoying being PG and assuming all will go well... Am i normal? or not?

Anyone else?

llfinch · July 2012

I am really trying hard to be of this mindset. With my stupid new diagnosis of APS, I am trying even harder to just go with the flow. I admire you!

LunasMom2012 · July 2012

I totally agree! I have hardly stressed at all about this pregnancy to my surprise. I feel relaxed and confident, but if something does happen, heartbreaking as it will be, it will be beyond my control. I think I am more afraid of creating stress on the fetus by worrying. However I do completely understand the moms who do worry, especially those who have had hard or unsuccesful past pregnancies.

NicoleN82 · July 2012

LunasMom2012:
I totally agree! I have hardly stressed at all about this pregnancy to my surprise. I feel relaxed and confident, but if something does happen, heartbreaking as it will be, it will be beyond my control. I think I am more afraid of creating stress on the fetus by worrying. However I do completely understand the moms who do worry, especially those who have had hard or unsuccesful past pregnancies.

yes, exactly! You phrased it a lot better than I did...this is exactly what I was thinking

kelly321 · July 2012

While I definitely do worry sometimes, I find that I am much less stressed about this pregnancy (post-m/c) than I was with DD (pre-m/c). Maybe I feel deep down that I experienced my fear and lived to tell about it, so if need be I could do it again? I don't know. Don't feel bad for not worrying, though, it doesn't make you a bad mom :-)

perplexed59 · July 2012

I don't waste my time with worrying about anything. Worry fixes nothing and really doesn't make anything better or easier. I have a similar mindset. Nothing I do or don't do will change what is going on with this baby (obviously above just watching what I eat and drink and taking care of myself). Even when I have gone through clots, bleeding etc I just brush off my worry and assume until I'm told otherwise, everything is fine.

You are normal. I think it is more recently that woman worry all the time about things because there are so many tools at our disposal. There weren't even ultrasounds when I was born. Women just assumed everything was fine until the worst thing happened.

schwabmomma · July 2012

Totally normal in my opinion. I can understand where you're coming from, and it's true, our bodies are designed to take care of baby and do what's best for them. So it's fine if our brains are detached from it a little. I haven't had a whole lot of symptoms thus far and I'm 10 weeks along and I feel alot like you do. Not stressing too much about things beyond your control is actually good and healthy for baby's development, so I think you're 100% normal and you're doing everything you need to do right now.

LunasMom2012 · July 2012

perplexed59:

You are normal. I think it is more recently that woman worry all the time about things because there are so many tools at our disposal. There weren't even ultrasounds when I was born. Women just assumed everything was fine until the worst thing happened.

Agreed. The uprise of technology leads to more findings, which leads to more stress, and horror stories.....most of it all unnecessary in the end. That's just my opinion though

nicobean1 · July 2012

I find that I'm not attached to this pregnancy at all. I'm just not allowing myself to go there yet b/c I've had a missed m/c. Like you said, nothing I can control. Not that I'm not excited, b/c I am. It was very much planned. I think I will feel better about it after my next u/s, which isn't for another 12 days.

meggipi5 · July 2012

NicoleN82:
LunasMom2012:
I totally agree! I have hardly stressed at all about this pregnancy to my surprise. I feel relaxed and confident, but if something does happen, heartbreaking as it will be, it will be beyond my control. I think I am more afraid of creating stress on the fetus by worrying. However I do completely understand the moms who do worry, especially those who have had hard or unsuccesful past pregnancies.

yes, exactly! You phrased it a lot better than I did...this is exactly what I was thinking

This! I feel the same way. I almost don't like reading all the worrisome posts. I think it helped me to read up on pregnancy before we conceived, so there haven't been any major surprises as far as symptoms go.

Normal? Or not?

Re: Normal? Or not?

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