Just recently found out i am pregnant w/ Quads and am terrified...
Any Quad moms out there?
Also, any triplet mammas who were faced with SR? my doc is strongly advising it. This is not an option i would like to take, but am trying to gather information. Thx!
Re: Any Quad moms out there?
There are a few quad moms around here, I'll try to get some of them to come chime in for you.
First off, congrats!! When did you find out? Do you know if they're identical/fraternal yet?
I'm *only* a triplet mom, but SR is a very personal subject and that really is going to have to be up to you and your beliefs. Personally, I said if the doc even mentioned it I'd be finding a new doc. They never said a word. With quads I might have at least listened to the doctors reasons, but I still wouldn't do it. Personally, I just cannot make that choice. How would I choose? Which baby would I not want? But again, that is up to you and your risk factors. Are you already in for a high risk pregnancy even without multiples (age, health, other factors)? Or are you a perfectly healthy younger mother who would have theoretically carried a singleton pregnancy to term with no issues? There's a lot to weigh in a decision like that.
thank you. we found out thursday- they r fraternal. there was a fifth sac as well, but it was empty..
i am pro-life and thought i would never consider SR. after reading some of the stats on quad pregnancies, though, i found myself considering it and i hate that! the stats are not good and very scary... i have read that 70-75% of the babies make it and 50-60% will have major birth defects. (will ask my doc to verify these, as i know u can't believe everything u read) i just don't think i could live with myself if i went through with it. i am 29 and have no health problems, though i have miscarried before.
I am only a twin MoM but I started off as a triplet MoM until we found out that Baby C had stopped growing at 8 weeks.
I would try and contact the local Mom of Multiples group-I know that mine has at least one quad mom, and one actually really recently.
I would also look into MOST- Moms of Super Twins. I am sure they would be able to connect you with a "Big Sister" that may be able to answer some questions. They also have a private forum that you could post on as well.
I remember how scary it was to see those 3 sacs. We had triggered with 2 mature follicles, so we never thought there would be three.
Good luck!
First of all, congratulations!
Secondly I wanted to tell you that I am pregnant with twins, so I've not been in your situation, but if I had gotten pregnant with more than 2 babies I would've absolutely chosen SR.
I feel like not a lot of people are willing to come out and admit that openly, but I was sure of it going into my IVF cycle and now that I'm 32 weeks pregnant with my twins I am absolutely positive that my body never would've held up to a higher order multiple pregnancy.
Anyway, this may not be well received, but I just wanted to let you know that there are those of us out there that would've chosen to reduce, so you don't feel so alone or like you're a bad person if you decide that's what's best for you and your body and your family.
Hi hon. First of all, congratulations. I know this is a terrifying time. I found out on Friday that we were expecting triplets after a SINGLE embryo transfer. Scared and stunned are still our two most prominent feelings, you're allowed to feel anything at all. Me RE has had the SR talk with me. I agree it's a very personal decision. For me, I support the drs wishes, but ultimately it's up to us. DH spent a day researching it and we decided we are going to wait to learn more about it until we are released to litle MFM in two weeks. The Internet an be a scary and dark place to gather information sometimes, so we are just tabling that discussion for a later date. Plus, in our case our appt was early at 6w3d. How far along are you?
Congrats again, and welcome.
thank you allison for your honesty. i think it's easy for a lot of people to judge those that are in the situation, but until they r actually in it, they have no idea. it's easy to say u would never do it when u dont know all of the facts. we r still weighing our options, waiting to talk to a few more docs. just scared to lose the entire pregnancy if we procede, but don't know how i could cope with making the decision. we had a miscarriage on dec, so i know what it is like to lose one, but that one was out of my hands, u know? this would be different...
robin- i read ur post about the triplets yesterday! crazy!! but exciting. according to LMP, i am 7 weeks today, though iui dates put me a few days further. we have another u/s on the 26th, so we will see how they r all doing.
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No one can fault you for going either direction. It's your body, your children, your choice.
In some situations, the decision is made for you if one or more stops developing.
Best of luck and no matter what happens .you are putting your children's best interest at heart.
I want to add, every single RE will suggest to reduce, every single one.. They do not like to see pregnancies over twins...their goal is 1 baby. One could say it looks bad in their stats when they get women pregnant with triplets or more.
Do not base your decisions on your RE's advice, they are there to get you pregnant, not advise or handle your pregnancy. That is what your MFM is for.
I agree - I don't think you'll find many people who will openly post on here "I had an SR and I'm glad I did." It's something that weighs on you (whether it ends up being the right decision or not) no matter what you do. If you decide not to and have complications you'll wonder "what if." If you decide to do it and have a perfect pregnancy you'll wonder what if. I would get other opinions before deciding. Get in touch with the MFM (high risk OB) that you'll end up seeing and talk to them. Talk to an OB. Talk to your RE. Make sure it's not just the "easy" way out, but that they really do have your best interests and health in mind and go from there.
I don't remember off hand, but did you say if they are identical/fraternal? That plays a roll too (as far as I know, if two babies are in the same sac you can't reduce one or the other, it'd have to be both), so that would play into this as well.
And I know it seems petty, but think about the monetary side of things. 1 baby = $$. 2 babies = $$$$. We were lucky to be stable enough financially to take the hit of having 3 babies at once, and had amazing family and friends who have given so much to us. Not everyone does. If it's between three babies who will be very well provided for, and 4 who will have to live without, that's something to consider as well.
I know just how you feel about losing a prior pregnancy. I was almost through my first trimester when I lost my first baby and it was horrible.
Good luck to you in whatever you decide. My husband and I played scenarios over and over in our heads prior to our IVF trying to decide what we would do if we ended up with more than 2 babies. In the end we didn't have to make the choice, but I am still 100% certain that I know what our decision would've been. Everyone is different, but to us the risk was just too high.
Again, good luck to you.
YGPM.
Congrats on your pregnancy!