3rd Trimester
Cry it out method - something to think about
I'm not advocating for or against the CIO method. To each his/her own. I could never do it but what works for each family is different. I could almost do modified Ferber but, honestly, it depends on the night. Some nights I know DD is just being a booger; other nights I can tell she needs/wants the nurturing.
Whatever you decide, I think this article is an interesting read.
https://shine.yahoo.com/parenting/crying-dangerous-kids-one-expert-says-222400379.html
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Re: Cry it out method - something to think about
I'm reading one of her books right now and I really like her style.
I agree.... Teaching them to self-soothe is extremely important. And you learn their cries and when they really need you! When ds is sick, teething, etc, I'm in his room within seconds when he cries for me.
No that is not the ferber method.... Read his book! You soothe them every few mins. You don't just leave them wailing for hours alone in their room. That's absolutely not the Ferber method.
I know, that's what I said. Most people associate Ferber with CIO, don't actually read the book, and think CIO is to just leave the baby crying. That's not it at all.
Exactly! And, that's NOT the ferber method - that's NEGLECT. We personally do not follow the ferber method, but I don't have a problem with those that properly do (like a few of our friends). DD has been a terrible sleeper since day #1. And, unfortunately for us, she's a climber and strong! Before putting her in a big girl bed (after climbing out of 2 different cribs - yes, lowest setting), we would let her cry/fuss for up to 5 minutes, before going in to check on her. We also had a video monitor, so we watched her during this time (want to make sure she's okay). Most of the time, she was out within 2 minutes.
Ditto. Teaching your child to self-soothe is crucial, IMO. We did modified CIO with our son and it worked like a charm after 2 nights. He was an awful sleeper before that. Now, we knew his cries by that point and we knew when he was just wanting attention vs. sick/in pain. From about 6 months on to present day, if he cries in the middle of the night, we KNOW something is wrong (sick, bad dream etc) because if he just happens to wake up, he knows how to put himself back to sleep on his own. THAT is what CIO is about, imo.
And some kids don't take to any method...like my DD. We've done it all "No Cry"- "Ferber" and straight up "CIO" for as long as it would take until she exhausted herself and fell asleep, none worked. NONE.- She simply does not want to go to bed in spite of the fact that she's rubbing her eyes and in a horrible mood-she fights us.
And I mean we've done literally everything books have to told us, everything our parents have recommended and stuff they didn't. We pushed back her bedtime, we pushed her bedtime forward we've done everything. Every.Single.Night is a struggle to get her to go to sleep. We have a routine and it doesn't matter because she KNOWS that there are certain things we won't say no to- like if she says she hungry/thirsty or she needs to use the potty- we have to give in because not doing so would be abusive and neglectful.
We start her bedtime routine at 7:30pm- if she's alseep before 9:30 that's a victory for us- because even if she's "in bed" at 8 she's fussing or asking for stuff for an hour after that.
I guess what I am saying is that no two children are alike and what works for some people doesn't/won't work for others no matter how much you want them to. I can tell you the frustration level at our house when 7:30 hits is huge. We've been struggling for almost two years with this.
I mostly agree with what everyone said so far.
I would just like to add that you are simply lucky if your kid is a good sleeper:D
Proud mother of two breech babies:)
OMG, I can feel your frustration. Poor thing. I hope your next one is the best sleeper ever.
I love these books! By Tracy Hogg - they advocate getting to know your child as an individual, reacting accordingly, and tailoring different methods to suit your family. We've used her "E.A.S.Y." method on my now 2yr old & are starting the 2mo old now. Even my hubby read this book