1st day back at work & a slap in the face
SunnyCanadian
member
Today was my 1st day back since finding out last week that I had a missed m/c.
One of the first things I did when I arrived was talk to my boss and explain what happened...and I must admit I had a little melt-down in the process. But she was really understanding and told me I could take as much time as I needed, even to escape the office and hide out in a meeting room for a breather. I managed to stop the tears and we headed back to our office...where lo and behold my coworker was in the midst of announcing her own pregnancy to my other coworkers! I felt the wind go out of me...but I put on my happy face and walked over to her and gave her a hug. I think it was just the grace of God that allowed me to remain my composure.
She's due June 7th...I was supposed to be due June 10th. I really AM happy for her as I know they had been trying for over a year, but my heart still ached with jealousy. It was just bad timing, you know? I hope this doesn't make me a horrible person 
I feel awful...
DD born 3/23/2013; Baby #2 EDD 9/7/2015
Re: 1st day back at work & a slap in the face
I am sorry for your loss and you aren't a horrible person. The fact that you were able to hold it together and give her a hug is awesome.
*BFP #1 9/10/11 Natural m/c 11/1/11 at 11 weeks, 5 days*
*Diagnosed as unexplained infertility*
*BFP #2 12/6/14 after IUI#2 Hopeful! EDD 8/14/15*
[spoiler] My Blog: Grow Baby Grow
BFP #1: 12/2009 m/c 1/2010 BFP #2: 6/2010 m/c 8/2010
BFP #3: 10/2011 ectopic 11/2011 (right tube removed, learned left tube was probably nonfunctional due to scar tissue from infection after m/c)
3 failed IUIs, IVF #1: 18R, 12M, 10F, 3 poor quality 5d embryos transferred= BFP #4!!!!!
Betas: 9dp5dt: 64 ~14dp5dt: 91 (expecting miscarriage, doubling time of 236 hours) ~16dp5dt: 200~18dp5dt: 500
First Ultrasound at 6w2d revealed two sacs, only one with a heartbeat
LK arrived after 42 weeks on August 14, 2013! Beautiful, healthy, and happy!
TTC#2: IVF booked for April 2015
Surprise BFP#5 February 19, 2015 EDD: November 2, 2015
Betas: 10dpo: 10, 14dpo: 77, 17dpo: 270
First Ultrasound at 5w1d showed a miracle UTE baby! And right ovary ovulation to left fallopian tube.
JD arrived at 38 weeks on October 20, 2015.
TTC #3: Since October 2017. BFP #6 July 2, 2018 EDD: March 16, 2019 [/spoiler]
BFP #1 9/25/2011 | EDD 6/1/2012 | M/C 10/26/2011 at 8w6d
BFP #2 3/13/2012 | EDD 11/23/2012
9DPO hcg: 45; Prog: 41 | 14DPO hcg: 694 | 17DPO hcg: 2733 | 28DPO hcg: 53,006
First u/s 4/13 showed a beating heart! Second u/s 5/2 showed a HB of 163! Let's GROW, baby!
He's here! Kellen born 11/16/12 - 8 lbs 8 oz 22 inches long via scheduled c-section (breech baby, gestational diabetes mama)
I can understand where your coming from. My SIL is pregnant and announced her pregnancy the same week we found out we lost ours. We were due days apart from each other.
She has been very supportive and understands our heartache. As I understand she is still going to have her baby.
It's going to hurt a lot, I am just hoping I can be pregnant before her LO is due.