Dunno How to Feel
Woodi
member
So I just had my ET on 9/22 and have been keeping up with all the meds since then. I was just told on Friday that I will go in on Monday morning for my first beta test. This is my first time doing IVF and I have felt more hopeful overall.
Previously, I had gotten to the point with IUI that I just expected it to fail so I'm not so devastated but I'm worried that if this IVF doesn't work I'm really going to go through some emotional upheaval.
I want to believe, but don't want to cry for days again (as I'm not a crier about anything but IF). I guess when it comes down to it, I'm just afraid and that's my overpowering emotion right now.
Has anyone else felt this way? I know I'm supposed to "think positive" but that makes it harder for me in the long run.
Re: Dunno How to Feel
I know in IF, there is always that sense of doubt. But I am a firm believer in "half glass full" gal. I know it is easier said than done.
Know that you have tons of ladies behind you sending you good vibes all the way!
Yep,I know exactly how you feel. I haven't gone through as much as you have, but these meds make us so emotional. I am already having anxiety thinking about what I will say I am thankful for this year at Thanksgiving if once again I am not pregnant...
I'm on my 15th month..and this is the first month that I've not been hopeful in anyway..because like you said, you don't want to go through an emotional upheaval..
im not right there yet but i know what your thinking. i always assumed with my iuis that they would just be negative. we are starting or first ivf and i am already thinking negatively. i think its just stuck in our brains that we will never get anything good, ya know what i mean? until you have a reason to not be hopeful then be happy, thats what i try to live by
hoping for some really good news for you!
TTC since 2005
missed miscarriage nov 2006- 4 failed clomid cycles-
3 failed femara iui cycles-
moving on to IVF oct 2011
ER nov. 7th
tansfered 2 blasts on 11/10
lots of +hpt!!
beta #1 on 11/21= 50.4
beta #2 on11/23= 90.8
another miscarriage 12/23
moving on to Round 2 of IVF with an auto immune dx
ER 4/23-retrieved 12 eggs
ET 4/28 3 transfered
Beta #1- 356
Beta #2- 870
I completely understand. I've gone through so many ups and downs. Sometimes I feel great and really positive, but sometimes I feel so awful. Every doctor I've ever seen has been so confident that the treatment plan will work, but it never does. I'm tired of getting my hopes up. With my IUIs, I was so okay with the negative result. No tears on beta day. However, I'm terrified with how I will cope with a negative beta from IVF. A friend who got pregnant after her second IUI once told me that she tried to stay positive until beta day. She figured she'd feel bad enough if the result is negative, so why feel miserable for any longer than she has to. I wish I were able to be that positive!
I think your feelings are so normal!! Good luck on Monday. I sincerely hope next week brings you some wonderful news
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12dp5dt: 765; 15dp5dt: 1979; 17dp5dt: 3379...TWINS!!!!!
Our perfect baby boys were born at 36w1d!!
I am in the same boat.... my first beta is tomorrow. I want to think positively, but I am not sure.
GL on Monday!!
Thanks ladies, it's so nice to talk to people that know what I'm going through. I'm going to try being cautiously optimistic and see where that gets me.
Good luck lilredj on your beta!! Sending the best vibes I can your way!! And best of luck to the rest of you ladies on the next step in your IF journey.