2nd Trimester

How do I plan a baby shower?

I have no idea what to do first!

Re: How do I plan a baby shower?

  • I'd start with a guest list so you can better plan for where you're going to hold it, figure out the date, and go from there.
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  • get someone to help you... i may be wrong, but i thought the expectant mother wasn't supposed to put the shower on... of all the showers i've been to, the mother of the expectant or a friend has done it.

    for me personally, i've been told by both my mother and aunt (who are doing it together for me) that i'm not allowed to do anything for it... all i've been allowed to do was get together the guest list and address for my mom and make the registry cards to go inside the invites.  other than that i've been banned.

    if you can get someone to help you though that will make it a lot easier... maybe someone you can split the duties with and who has done this before. 

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  • Usually someone throws one for you. If you're thinking about a shower for yourself, it's kind of tacky. Hopefully you are asking because you're throwing one for a friend.
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  • Is this a serious question? Weird, I just never knew a woman who didn't know how to plan an event, ha! I am an event planner for a living, so I live, eat, and breathe things like this.

    The Mommy should not have to lift a finger, but you can ger her input. Create a guest list, send the invites, include where Mommy is registered. Pick a date and a venue, be it at someone's house or wherever. Make sure you have LOTS of food and beverages. I always serve alcohol at my parties, no matter what. If people want to not drink, that is totally up to them, but I like to offer it. Even if it's just champagne and mimosas at a brunch.

    I am not big on games, because a lot of people don't like them, and I like to make guests WANT to be there. Maybe one game? Go online and find one you like. Then a baby shower is about opening the gifts and oohing and ahhing over the cute stuff! And eating! A baby shower should be no longer than 3 hours, and you should have food available right away. I have been to showers where we opened presents for two straight hours, and everyone was starving. Not good.

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  • Hi,

    Forget all those who say "you shouldn't throw yourself a baby shower, it's tacky"! I for one and throwing mine with the help of my Mom & Mother in Law. I love them, but I'm way to "type A" to not have a part in the planning. I also serve as a liason between the two so I can make sure that I have a say in what is going on.

    Like a PP suggested, get a guest list going so you know how many people you are going to invite. Then find a place to hold it. I have 90 women invited (just family and a few close friends, gotta love the Irish, Italian & Portugese families) so I knew someone's house wasn't going to cut it. Also if you are planning on renting a hall type place make sure you call far enough in advance so that you aren't running into availablity issues. Plan on 6 weeks before your due date for the shower, more if you want to be more "comfortable and less preggo". Have a few dates in mind when you choosing your venue so you can be flexible if you must. Enlist the help of a friend or family member to help you with the actual planning of the event, think of it like you would a party. Are you hiring a catering company, will the food be finger foods you cook yourself (or have friends/family cook?) Decorations are something to think about once you have a venue/location picked out. Do you have a theme you are going with, or certain colors? Invitations can range from print yourself, or write in yourself ones to several dollars a piece, don't forget postage too! Are you planning to play games? If so don't forget the prizes! A registry makes it easier for people to purchase you items you want and or need, take a friend who has had children before so you can get the "needed" not just "wanted" items. I took my Mom since I'm the first of my friends to have a baby.

     Any shower can be as big and extravagant as you want it to be, or as simple as you'd like, it is all up to you, and those you have helping you out. Like I said earlier, I am way to opinionated to not have a hand in planning my own shower. (I know I'm going to hear it from several "bumpies" about it, but ya know what, I really don't care!) It's a party to celebrate my unborn daughter and it's a time to be "showered" with love and affection from my family & friends.

    Good Luck with the planning!! And remember, do what makes YOU happy!!

     

  • Ask me nicely and you can have it at my mansion. I'll even throw in an elephant for free.
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  • You don't. Someone plans it for you.
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  • imagemabenner1:
    You don't. Someone plans it for you.

    This. 
    The ONLY way that a shower thrown by the recipient is not tacky, is if there are no gifts involved, in which case, it's not a shower anymore anyway. .

    Why are showers called showers? Because you "shower" the person with presents. How is it NOT tacky to make a party where you are the center of attention, and everyone comes and brings you presents.  Please don't be so self-centered and greedy.

    A shower is a GIFT that someone gives you, not a right, not a necessity. You will get along just fine if you end up not having a shower. Bummer? Yes. But it will be ok.

    Now, if you're asking how to throw a shower for someone else, then ignore everything I just said. :)

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  • First off, please ignore the people who have told you that the MTB isn't supposed to throw her shower.  If you want to have a part in throwing your shower, then do it, because if you have ideas and someone else just throws them away, you won't be happy with the shower.  Besides, who in the world is really going to get in the way of a pregnant woman.  Seriously?  We bite.  

    Second, get someone to help.  Whether it's mom or a friend or a sister. SOMEONE.  If you have someone to bounce ideas off of, it'll be a lot better in the long run.   

    Third, create a prospective guest list.  Even if it's just all of the ladies you want to invite, it gives you a number to start with so that you can find someplace to throw the party.   

    Good Luck!!!  

  • Please don't throw your own shower. It just screams tacky.
  • Eeek. If you have enough people who care about you to attend a shower in your honor, then I am sure you have enough people who care about you for one of them to plan the shower. 

    If I heard that anyone I know was throwing their own shower because nobody else was, I would immediately step in to do it for them... If I found out they were throwing their own shower because they wanted to control how people honor them and give them gifts then I most certainly would not attend. If the host asks for your input, please share it. Otherwise, think of it as a ceremony honoring you--- you would not host that, would you? 

    DD #1: 2012; MMC: 2014; DD #2: 2015; It's a boy! 3/31/2018

  • imageLilRhodyMomma:

    Hi,

    Forget all those who say "you shouldn't throw yourself a baby shower, it's tacky"! I for one and throwing mine with the help of my Mom & Mother in Law. I love them, but I'm way to "type A" to not have a part in the planning. I also serve as a liason between the two so I can make sure that I have a say in what is going on.

    Like a PP suggested, get a guest list going so you know how many people you are going to invite. Then find a place to hold it. I have 90 women invited (just family and a few close friends, gotta love the Irish, Italian & Portugese families) so I knew someone's house wasn't going to cut it. Also if you are planning on renting a hall type place make sure you call far enough in advance so that you aren't running into availablity issues. Plan on 6 weeks before your due date for the shower, more if you want to be more "comfortable and less preggo". Have a few dates in mind when you choosing your venue so you can be flexible if you must. Enlist the help of a friend or family member to help you with the actual planning of the event, think of it like you would a party. Are you hiring a catering company, will the food be finger foods you cook yourself (or have friends/family cook?) Decorations are something to think about once you have a venue/location picked out. Do you have a theme you are going with, or certain colors? Invitations can range from print yourself, or write in yourself ones to several dollars a piece, don't forget postage too! Are you planning to play games? If so don't forget the prizes! A registry makes it easier for people to purchase you items you want and or need, take a friend who has had children before so you can get the "needed" not just "wanted" items. I took my Mom since I'm the first of my friends to have a baby.

     Any shower can be as big and extravagant as you want it to be, or as simple as you'd like, it is all up to you, and those you have helping you out. Like I said earlier, I am way to opinionated to not have a hand in planning my own shower. (I know I'm going to hear it from several "bumpies" about it, but ya know what, I really don't care!) It's a party to celebrate my unborn daughter and it's a time to be "showered" with love and affection from my family & friends.

    Good Luck with the planning!! And remember, do what makes YOU happy!!

     

    Yes, just do what makes YOU happy! Be greedy! Demand gifts! Demand money! Demand that everyone cater to your whims and wishes! YOU are the only one in the entire world who matters!!!

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  • You don't. 

    If someone offers to throw you one and you want one then you accept their offer.  

    Baby showers are not mandatory.  


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  • imageoletan:

    I have no idea what to do first!

    Um, find the person that is wanting to throw it for you?

    You can't throw it yourself...

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  • Screw the crap when people say, "It's tacky to throw your own shower."  I'd say don't do everything yourself, but it's not bad to help plan.  Have your friends host it for you, but if you want to do all the planning yourself, then dammit, do it.

    If it's a small shower for your close family and friends, there's nothing wrong with planning all of it, simply because you KNOW all of your friends and family are super excited and want to do something (even if it's small) for your LO.  If it's for a huge group and all kind of people are attending, I'd just say have your input about the way you want your shower to go, but don't PLAN all of it...if that makes sense.


    That's just my opinion.  People get so anal about "planning your own baby shower".  

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  • Don't worry about those who are getting all up in arms about you throwing your own shower. Do what you want, if you want to plan it, plan it, if you want help, get help. There is no right way or wrong way to do it, there is the "acceptable norm" and then there is "your norm". This is almost as hotly debated as to breastfeed or not to breastfeed. You do what makes you and your family happy.

  • imagekes487:

    Screw the crap when people say, "It's tacky to throw your own shower."  I'd say don't do everything yourself, but it's not bad to help plan.  Have your friends host it for you, but if you want to do all the planning yourself, then dammit, do it.

    If it's a small shower for your close family and friends, there's nothing wrong with planning all of it, simply because you KNOW all of your friends and family are super excited and want to do something (even if it's small) for your LO.  If it's for a huge group and all kind of people are attending, I'd just say have your input about the way you want your shower to go, but don't PLAN all of it...if that makes sense.


    That's just my opinion.  People get so anal about "planning your own baby shower".  

    Incorrect.  Not being rude does not equal "being anal."

    AND you are actually agreeing with us.  Of course the MTB can help...but she cannot THROW her own shower.  Big difference...

    Apparently reading comprehension isn't a strength of yours. 

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  • Weird, I would never have assumed this person was talking about her OWN shower. That doesn't happen in these parts.
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  • Oh, yeah I just noticed it is her only post... probably a troll and I totally fell for it!

    DD #1: 2012; MMC: 2014; DD #2: 2015; It's a boy! 3/31/2018

  • imageMrsKujawski:

    get someone to help you... i may be wrong, but i thought the expectant mother wasn't supposed to put the shower on... of all the showers i've been to, the mother of the expectant or a friend has done it.

    for me personally, i've been told by both my mother and aunt (who are doing it together for me) that i'm not allowed to do anything for it... all i've been allowed to do was get together the guest list and address for my mom and make the registry cards to go inside the invites.  other than that i've been banned.

    if you can get someone to help you though that will make it a lot easier... maybe someone you can split the duties with and who has done this before. 

     

    I was told I wasn't going to anything for mine either... but then nobody wanted to get the ball rolling, or plan the games, or buy anything for it.... People are funny, they say they want to plan something but then when it comes down to it don't. Luckily my Mom is helping and them otherwise it would be a big unorganized mess lol.

     

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  • I think it's funny how so many are assuming she is throwing her own shower. She simply asked how to throw "A Shower" not "My Shower". 

    I honestly don't think it's tacky to throw your own, but as you can see others do. It's not rude or selfish, people don't have to bring gifts to a shower you plan or someone else might plan for you.... it's a merely a suggestion when you put where you're registered, just like they don't have to buy off of your registry.

    I'm helping in planning my shower, and it's being throw at my house. My Mom, Grandma, Sis in-law, cousin, and best friend are all working with me to plan mine. If you're planning one for someone definitely see if relatives, or other friends want to help plan one. If you're planning one for yourself, talk to your Mom about it see if she is willing to assist and maybe host the shower for you. There's nothing wrong in wanting a little help with getting items for your baby and you, it's expensive and can be hard to get everything you need, this doesn't mean you're being greedy by wanting a shower.  

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  • imageCBizakis420:

    I think it's funny how so many are assuming she is throwing her own shower. She simply asked how to throw "A Shower" not "My Shower". 

    I honestly don't think it's tacky to throw your own, but as you can see others do. It's not rude or selfish, people don't have to bring gifts to a shower you plan or someone else might plan for you.... it's a merely a suggestion when you put where you're registered, just like they don't have to buy off of your registry.

    I'm helping in planning my shower, and it's being throw at my house. My Mom, Grandma, Sis in-law, cousin, and best friend are all working with me to plan mine. If you're planning one for someone definitely see if relatives, or other friends want to help plan one. If you're planning one for yourself, talk to your Mom about it see if she is willing to assist and maybe host the shower for you. There's nothing wrong in wanting a little help with getting items for your baby and you, it's expensive and can be hard to get everything you need, this doesn't mean you're being greedy by wanting a shower.  

    I don't even know where to start with this terrible post.  WOW.  So much incorrect on this one.

    1. A shower is by definition a gift-giving event.  It is rude of a guest to show up to a shower without a gift.  It is NOT "merely a suggestion".  *headdesk*

    2. "There's nothing wrong in wanting a little help with getting items for your baby and you, it's expensive and can be hard to get everything you need, this doesn't mean you're being greedy by wanting a shower."  THIS little gem just takes the cake.  Yes, it's expensive.  But it's the parents' responsibility to shoulder this burden.  It is incredibly greedy to "want some help."  It's no one's responsibility to help you buy a swing or diapers.  Showers are a nice gesture, but no one is entitled to them and to want one just to get some stuff so you don't have to shell out the cash is the height of tackiness.  I guess some people have class and some don't.  This is no different than if you wanted to buy a new car and you solicited your friends for donations toward the downpayment.  If someone can't afford it, then maybe she should be looking into adoption or should've thought of that before she got pregnant.  A baby doesn't need a million different gadgets or 40 receiving blankets.  If someone can't afford it, then go with the bare minimum...Wal-mart sells onesies very cheaply.  Buy some off-brand diapers.  Breastfeed for as long as possible. 

    A shower is a GIFT in and of itself given to the MTB.  I have no problem with women helping out with their own showers...my best friend is due 9 weeks after me so we're working together on both of our showers (she's throwing me one, I'm throwing her one) to mitigate the costs and have some help.  But I did NOT say "Oh, I'm throwing myself a shower" and then ask her to help...she offered as did I.

    You should go post these thoughts over on the Baby Showers board.  I'd LOVE to read that thread.

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