Babies: 3 - 6 Months
Stapier01
member
Feeling a little like a failure today :(
Stapier01
member
C is getting formula today. I'm not worried about giving him formula, I know he'll be just fine. I also don't judge people who FF, what ever the reasons. But I set a personal goal to make it 6 months with EBF, and have been devoting all my spare time at work to hiding in the closet to pump. In the past few weeks, my supply during the day has totally fallen off. I used to pump 12-15 ounces during the work day. Now I'm lucky to pump 8. My freezer stash, which wasn't big to begin with, falls a little shorter every day. C is spending the night with his grandparents this weekend so H and I can go out for our anniversary, and I won't have enough saved to get him through the night. So, I decided to show H how to use the formula, and told him to mix it 50/50 with BM for the three bottles he takes during the day. I had convinced myself that it was the right choice and that I didn't need to stress about it. But H says "are you sure this is the right thing to do? Can't you just try to pump a few more times at night?" Well, jerkface, last time I pumped in the evening I got half an ounce. I'm really struggling today 
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Re: Feeling a little like a failure today :(
I completely get where you are coming from. I would be devastated, too. And I would be upset at my H for making a comment like that - like you wouldn't do the best you could do?
Have you tried to increase your supply?
Regardless, you have to remember that the important thing here is that you are feeding your baby the best way you can right now. That's all that matters. Your baby will be just fine, you are an awesome mom, and soon you will feel better about this.
Aw, I'm sorry. My H also doesn't understand that I can't just get more milk by plugging myself into the machine. I think it's one of those things that you don't really get until you've hooked yourself up to the pump for 20-30 minutes to get an ounce
Just keep in mind that you've given him BM for over 3 months now, and that's awesome.
There are a few things you can try to increase your supply (don't know if you've looked into these already or if it's something that you're interested in doing, and remember that your sanity is also of great importance). Fenugreek, oatmeal, dark beer (I like oatmeal stouts), and even if you don't get a lot of milk out of an evening's pumping session you're still sending signals to your body to make more. You could also try power pumping (pump 10 min, rest 10 min, repeat for an hour, do several days in a row). In the end, though, your baby will be just fine with formula. Don't beat yourself up over this. You've done a great job.