NBR poll: Did you keep your madien name?

RunningWife · February 2011

I was having a discussion about this yesterday with a friend who DID keep hers. She claimed it never crossed her mind to take her husband's name.

However, it never crossed my mind NOT to take it. I am very proud of being a Hamilton for 25 years, which is why DS has it as one of his middle names, but I always planned on taking my husband's name.

What about you ladies? Did you take it or not? And what is your reason why/why not?

Amber0808 · February 2011

I took my husbands last name. The thought to keep my maiden name never crossed my mind.

BlueRidge8 · February 2011

I did (I thought he had a good one) but not at the expense of my middle name - which my family is attached to.

So now I get to be LBPS

*Edit* After reading other responses, I didn't realize it was popular to drop the maiden name all together. I kept all four names, so I'm First Middle Maiden Married.

cheerleader.08 · February 2011

I took his name for the same reason as you. I grew up in a very traditional southern area, so keeping your maiden name is very rare. My husband is from out West, and we noticed that in Seattle it does not seem to just be a given that you will change your name.

dangerkitty102 · February 2011

My maiden name is now my middle name.

msm261 · February 2011

My maiden name is my middle name now, and DS's first name!

fotobird · February 2011

I took my DH's last name. What's even stranger is when a woman makes her H take HER last name.

xDanniellex · February 2011

For me, it was never a question. I was taking H's last name.

I had no real connection to my maiden name. My mom got remarried, so she didn't have the same last name anymore, my little sister has a different last name so that left me and my sister. Plus, I'm on the outs with my dad, so dropping his last name was A-OK with me.

In addition, I want the same last name as my kids, and don't like the last name hyphenated deal.

jennygirlmt · February 2011

I was excited to take DH's name but left my maiden name on my official docs next to my middle name, just so I could see it :-) That and I became a really common name and thought that having it in there would make it harder to steal my identity :-)

ETA: I am jealous of people who can use their names as LOs name. I had a coworker who had a baby with her BF (they're married now) but they made her name the middle and he has the coolest name ever. Jealous!

snansley · February 2011

My maiden name is now my middle name and will hopefully be used in some fashion if we have a girl. My taking his name was very important to DH and I always planned to take it. We are traditional and southern and such.

CocoP2008 · February 2011

xDanniellex:

For me, it was never a question. I was taking H's last name.

I had no real connection to my maiden name. My mom got remarried, so she didn't have the same last name anymore, my little sister has a different last name so that left me and my sister. Plus, I'm on the outs with my dad, so dropping his last name was A-OK with me.

In addition, I want the same last name as my kids, and don't like the last name hyphenated deal.

This. I took my husband's name. It never crossed my mind either to not take it.

sugarland726 · February 2011

dangerkitty102:
My maiden name is now my middle name.

I grew up never knowing anyone who did that until I got my first real job. Women in my family just dropped their maiden name when they got married, so that was normal. I think it's a great alternative to losing the maiden name altogether. I didn't do it though, so I am First Name Middle Name Married Name.

MrsH44 · February 2011

Amber0808:
I took my husbands last name. The thought to keep my maiden name never crossed my mind.

This.

dmoreilly · February 2011

I took DH's name, never occurred to me not to. My maiden name was fairly common so "becoming Irish" made it more unique. Although nobody could spell my first name correctly before and now I also have to spell my last name, but I am all right with that. Hyphenated is just too long. If we had had a son, he would have gotten my maiden name as his last name, but we had a girl so the last name dies with me (no boys, I only have sisters). Which is a bit unfortunate.

Tippy05 · February 2011

I took DH's name. I never considered keeping my maiden name. The only "problem" now is that instead of having a last name at the beginning of the alphabet, it's now at the end which means we'll have to wait for EVERYTHING! Stick out tongue

mrs.kapow · February 2011

dangerkitty102:
My maiden name is now my middle name.

This.

It's way too funky to ever be a child's first name, though, which makes me a little sad.

Cytina · February 2011

Tippy05:
I took DH's name. I never considered keeping my maiden name. The only "problem" now is that instead of having a last name at the beginning of the alphabet, it's now at the end which means we'll have to wait for EVERYTHING!

Same here!

superned · February 2011

I kept my maiden name and never considered taking DH's name. DD has DH's last name and my last name is her middle name.

I have a very common first name so it's always been my last name that is more distinguishing. I didn't want to give it up. It's never been a big deal.

LJR 84 · February 2011

We're not married yet, but I'll probably take my fiance's last name. I'm not the traditional type so I have considered keeping my own. However, I'd really like to have the same last name as my kids, so I'll likely take his.

I personally think it's a lot more common to take your husbands last name, but I've heard lots of people here lately say otherwise. I guess times are changing!

embersoul · February 2011

We compromised and combined our last names and then we both changed it. No hyphen just smashed together. So all 3 of us have the same name AND both of our last names are accounted for. Plus it sounds cool, I think we're lucky it worked out like that.

rach10782 · February 2011

I took my husbands last name and dropped my maiden name. Perhaps I am strange but I was so excited to have the same last name as my husband. I am not old fashioned at all but for some reason I feel strongly about taking the mans last name.

ash07a · February 2011

When SO and I get married I plan on using a hyphenated last name .

matthew24 · February 2011

I kept my maiden name and really don't have any intentions of changing it. Honestly, he has a very long obnoxious name and even more importantly I really don't want to be associated with most of his family. That might sound bad but I like having my separation from them which to me means keeping my maiden name.

Though I haven't legally changed it, I go by both names. DD's daycare calls me Mrs. (dh) and everyone else does as well; I use them interchangeably all the time.

mcc81 · February 2011

I took my husband's name, never thought of keeping my maiden name.

reasons: tradition, not that close to my dad so didn't feel particularly attached to it, will use it for a boy's name if we have a son.

VABride2008 · February 2011

I took my husbands last name. Never crossed my mind not to.

hlashley · February 2011

I took my husband's name upon marriage. I think there's something beautiful about being called by my husband name, its a deep sense of belonging and unity to it. You can totally belong together and be in unity even w/o out the name change obviously. But I've always been rather into symbolism. And no, I don't feel that I've lost one ounce of myself just because my husband and I belong to each other.

JillAly · February 2011

I hyphenated my maiden and married names but I never use both unless I'm signing a legal document.

I was "older" when I got married- in my mid-30's. I had established a career using my maiden name so I wanted to keep it for work. It is also a safety thing for me to keep my maiden name at work and not have some people find out my married name because of the type of job I have. However, I wanted to have the same name as my kids for traveling (on my passport), school, etc. I didn't want there to be any confusion.

It hasn't been a problem - people at work know me by my maiden name and people in my social life call me by my married name. I'm the only one who gets confused!

dreemac · February 2011

I still use my maiden name. I was married in Quebec, where marriage is not a valid reason for changing your last name (because the divorce rate was so ridiculously high in the 1980s, and it was causing all kinds of problems for official record-keeping). I'm glad I didn't in the end, I like it better with my first name than my husband's.

My last name is Gabe's middle name. If we have other children we plan to do that as a tradition.

June2007 · February 2011

I kept my name. I think the tradition of taking the mans name is out dated and dumb. Our DD's legally have both our names, hyphenated. But we use my last name socially, for monograming, when they're in school etc because it is a better sounding name.

teamsweet · February 2011

It was a really hard decision - one that I will second guess for a while. Ultimately, I wanted our family (kids) to all have the same last name. And dh didn't want to break his father's heart and change his name. I often wish dh and I had both chosen a new last name.

eta: my maiden is my middle

l0613p · February 2011

I took DH's last name. I had an extremely long and Polish last name. My married name is so much shorter and easier.

JamesMom10 · February 2011

I took my husband's name. I wanted to hyphenate maiden-married, but that would have been 20 letters and a hyphen... way too long. My married name is polish though and people have the worst time saying it.

matthew24 · February 2011

JillAly:

I had established a career using my maiden name so I wanted to keep it for work. It is also a safety thing for me to keep my maiden name at work and not have some people find out my married name because of the type of job I have. However, I wanted to have the same name as my kids for traveling (on my passport), school, etc. I didn't want there to be any confusion.

It hasn't been a problem - people at work know me by my maiden name and people in my social life call me by my married name. I'm the only one who gets confused!

This is also true for me. If I did change my name, I would have worked under my maiden name which is much more common than my husband's.

STAR15 · February 2011

I wanted to have the same name as my future child(ren). End of story.

eliza16t · February 2011

I kept my maiden name. I was going to change it, but I kept procrastinating and realized I was putting it off because I didn't want to change it. My husband has a hard to pronounce last name, and my first and maiden name have really good flow. Plus, the historical reasons for the practice do bother me. My husband didn't care if I changed it or not, so I didn't. When I get my PhD, I want to be Dr. MaidenName. To be honest my mother was the most bothered by my decision. She's pretty traditional. Socially, I go by either. For instance, on our Christmas cards we used his last name. I have joint address labels with just his last name and a set with our separate names.

Sharon&Paul · February 2011

msm261:
My maiden name is my middle name now, and DS's first name!

This is an odd question, bu I was wondering if you knew what color paint the blue wall in your pictures is? I LOVE that color, but can not seem to find the paint color that looks like it. I am not sure if you would call it blue or grey.

RunningWife · February 2011

dreemac:
I still use my maiden name. I was married in Quebec, where marriage is not a valid reason for changing your last name (because the divorce rate was so ridiculously high in the 1980s, and it was causing all kinds of problems for official record-keeping). I'm glad I didn't in the end, I like it better with my first name than my husband's.
My last name is Gabe's middle name. If we have other children we plan to do that as a tradition.

WOW! I didn't realize that married women don't take their husband's names. My mom was born in Montreal and has never mentioned it. Granted, her and my dad married here, in BC,so she may not have known.

Interesting...

Watergirl21 · February 2011

I really screwed up the name change process and I wish I had never even bothered. Initially I really wanted to take DH's last name- it is a nice scottish last name and i am scottish but my last name was german, I also wanted to have the last name as any LO's. But when I got married I delayed changing my name because I owned a house in my maiden name, then the market fell apart and I couldn't sell the house till a year later. In the interim I changed my last name at work (but not on any documents). When LO was born I hadn't yet changed my health card so in the hospital she was listed under my maiden name. Finally this past summer I changed my name on my driver's license, health card and passport- but not on my SIN - because a lawyer told me not to do that. Now I am having issues with the bank because my ID is in my married name, but I need my tax/rrsp info in my maiden name. It's a big mess... As for DD she has DH's name as her last name and my maiden name as her middle name. DH and I agreed that my maiden name would be used as a middle name for all the kids we would have. If I could do it all again I definately would do it differently.

As an aside I know a girl who had a baby on her own via IVF -the baby had her last name, then she got married and had another baby with her DH and they named the second baby with her last name so the kids would have the same last name.

GoBleu · February 2011

I kept my maiden name for 6 years because DH and I would have been the equivalent of this:

John Christopher Doe and Jane Christina Doe.

DH was never bothered by me keeping my maiden name, even when we were greeted on our honeymoon as Mr. and Mrs. MaidenName. I had always planned to take DH's name when we had children and it was very important to DH that I did it before I delivered so that the hospital wouldn't refer to the baby as Baby MaidenName.

Good thing not too much pregnancy weight was in my face because getting a new driver's license photo at 37 weeks pregnant was not my best idea

SarahP10 · February 2011

i took my husbands last name, there was no question in my mind. i was exstatic to have his name as mine. my kids and my husband and i all have the same last name and i wouldn't have it any other way. all my family and his took their husbands name, i love him soooo much i want everyone to know we r a family, no question bout it

Roxpup · February 2011

I ditched my maiden name... I'm First Middle Married. I have no emotional attachment to my maiden name, I love my dad a lot, but his family totally screwed us over and we don't talk to them, so leaving that last name behind is no skin off my nose. I'm his daugther and will always be a S_______, but I'm glad I took DH's name.

My mom's maiden name is Cole and I love her family and considered naming Collin "Cole" - but it evolved to Collin instead, I like it better and it sounds better with our last name than Cole.

NBR poll: Did you keep your madien name?

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