Babies: 3 - 6 Months
SAHMs - question re: DH
Just wondering...how often do you hear from DH during the day? Does he call to check in etc?
**Preparing to be mad at mine after reading responses!!**
This discussion has been closed.
Re: SAHMs - question re: DH
DH travels (the rest of the time he is home). When he is on travels, he calls approx. twice in a 24 hour time period.
Honestly, I'm pretty busy all day long, so it's not like I'm sitting by the phone (cell phone) and about 75% of the time I miss his call anyway. :-)
Very rarely.. unless he needs me to do something for him.
I should probably not return to this post after this.. I will probably get mad at mine too.
My BFP Chart
No. Why would he? He's at work. I only stay home two days a week, but I don't even call my sitter to check in when I'm at work. He's at work to work not have repeated personal conversations with his wife.
Never.
DH travels most of the time. . . when he's here he works from home, but he's in his home office on the phone and I rarely interrupt him.
When he's traveling he tries to call DD to say goodnight to her, but we don't generally get to talk. It's a bummer.
He comes home for lunch every day.
Some days we'll email/text back and forth a few times, but some days we don't. He never calls to just check on me.
Today we emailed back and forth because I wanted his opinion on ds's Halloween costume.
Wow. Ok. Point taken. Maybe I should've saved this for Friday and entitled my FFFC: "I'd like to hear from my husband during the day."
Only when he's on his way home from his *long* commute (3 miles)... hehe.
Or when one of his students wants to call me - but that's not to check up on me, it's so his student can practice her social skills.
(both special ed teachers)
We text back and forth if either of us has something to tell the other, and if something important was happening, we would call but day to day there is just no need for a working spouse to be calling and checking on the other.
In fact, it drives me batty when my coworker's SAH spouses call up here 57 times a day.
Maybe that's why I expect to hear from mine, because he's the boss. I sure wish he'd take the dogs to work! I love them, but we need some space.
Really? I thought his only purpose in life was to text message me regularly?
Boooooo!
In all seriousness, it does get a little lonely sometimes if I don't hear from him at least once. And luckily my DH is at a job where he has some free time sometimes (breaks) to send me a quick text or email. We're perty in love with each other so we try to touch base and say hi throughout the day.
At first, I told him not to call (that I would call him) because I was so busy with DS and was often trying to nap. Now that DS is older and I'm getting more used to the lack of sleep, he'll call once or twice depending on how his day is. I will call him once or twice too.
Regardless of who calls who, we usually end up talking about two to three times a day. Unless it's super crazy at his work that is.
LOL!!! This exacly... sometimes I'll make up some stupid reason to call him, or I'll text him to call me when he has down time.
This! I may get an email every now and then, usually I'm part of some group email about something going on...but I rarely get a middl eof the day phone call. he's too busy, and that's fine.
I work but we stay in touch. Usually he'll text me something sweet when he gets to work (before his students get to class), then a quick call at his lunch and then a call on his way home.
All convos are very short and sweet tho.
I honeslty would be annoyed if he checked in during the day. I would take that as he doesn't trust me.
We do email occasionally though.
eta: I took issue with the verbage. to "check up on" implies lack of trust IMO. But I think if the OP had said "to say hi" or whatever, I would have had a different reaction.
Honestly, I think its a bit ridiculous for those who talk to their spouses several times a day while they are at work. Especially if they are only working an 8-10 hour day, why not just save it for when they get home and you can have conversation then? I suppose I'm being snarky about it, but I just remember when I was working that one of the girls would get a call from her dh who was out of work several times a day and therefore she would be on the phone and we'd have to answer the work phone which is her job just because she's talking to her dh. Plus, he'd call the main line so we'd be playing her secretary by transferring her calls for her etc. She also went home on lunch so its not like she is gone from him all day long. I think its inapropriate to use work time for personal calls. During lunch or breaks is different, but when you see someone everyday numerous phone calls just seems clingy.
DH works 10hr days and he'll usually send me a text once a day saying he loves me and he'll call if he knows I had a rough night or something to see how I'm doing but thats it and I'm 100% okay with that. You're at work to work, not make personal calls.
We text back and forth throughout the day and he calls during lunch or during a break. He texts to let me know he's on his way home and to ask if I need anything. Sometimes he calls on the way home when he forgets that I don't like him being on the phone while driving. Savannah drivers are freaking idiots.
ETA after reading other replies: I think it's interesting that so many people think it's wierd to talk throughout the day. Every marriage is different. Some marriages thrive on time apart, some married couples prefer to be around each other a lot, and talk often. It's not wierd, it's just different than what you and your spouse are comfortable with. With all the varied personalities in this world, it would make sense that each marriage would have different rules.
I don't take DH calling me as he doesn't trust me. I know he trusts me. He calls because he wants to talk to me, and I want to talk to him. He only works every other day and I still miss him when he's not here. Simple as that.
To each their own. 
OP- Just tell him how you feel. If you'd like to hear from him during his lunch or breaks, let him know. I'm sure he just doesn't think about it.
In the situation you mentioned, yes that is inappropriate. Talking on the phone was interfering with her work.
But every job is different. If the job is such that couples can talk several times a day, then there's nothing wrong with it, IMO.
My DH is active duty Army, but he is getting medically retired from the Army. The job he has now is such that he can text and call several times a day. He does this in front of his superiors, and they don't care. They are doing the same with their spouses.
This, or if he needs something.
However, we typically email back and forth a couple times a day though.
He calls on his way home from work 99% of the time.
Otherwise, it's sporadic. If he's driving someplace (sometimes he has to go to field sites), or if he's picking up lunch b/c he forgot his, then he often calls on his way to and/or from those places. He called today at lunch to tell me that my diaper bag was in his car, so not to go crazy looking for it. Which I was.
When he's traveling, he calls whenever he can; at least 1-2 times a day, usually in the evening.
Sometimes if we had a rough night with the girls, he'll call to see how I'm doing. But on regular days, he doesn't just "check in".
DD1, 1/5/2008 ~~~ DD2, 3/17/2010
DH is in meetings pretty much all day, so I don't really expect to hear from him. He calls if he wants to meet for lunch (about once or twice a week), and if I need him to pick stuff up on his way home I email him... but that's about it.
Eleanor Noelle - 18/05/12 Claire Elisabeth - 16/-5/10
Just for the record, I said "check in" not "check up on", which I think are two different things.