Natural Birth

just schedule a c-section?

I am outraged!

Currently I take classes through University of Phoenix online.  I am very close to getting my degree!  I spoke with my academic advisor about taking time off when the baby is born.  She informed me I can only take 2 weeks off and I can't use "that" as a medical reason to take a leave of absence for 2 months.  

Of course as we all know, babies come when they want, so there is no way for me to schedule 2 weeks off this far ahead of time.  Who knows when this baby will make an appearance?  That's part of the fun.  

She said, without missing a beat, "You'll just have to schedule a c-section for October 11th."  WHAT?!?!?!?!  Is it just me or is this completely out of line?  Schedule major abdominal surgery 2 weeks before my baby is even due to accommodate my school?  It's infuriating.  The worst part is that she thought I was crazy for not agreeing with her.    

Re: just schedule a c-section?

  • My sister inlaw was doing her school online with the same place and my brother (her husband) died suddenly and they gave her the biggest time about needing time off to get things squared away after his passing..Well 2 months after my brothers sudden death my sister inlaws brothers committed suicide and had to deal with it all over..They gave her the run around soo much.. Good luck with dealing with them!!
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  • that's horrible. can you have your MW/OB write a letter (or, write it yourself and have them sign & send) informing them that scheduling a c/s for purposes of furthering ones education is an ill-advised practice and they will not do it unless it is for medical reasons.

    how shameful. can you go over her head to request the time? 

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  • The idea that she would even suggest that you schedule a c-section is absurd.

    That said, when I was in college (at a regular university, not online), I went to class with a couple of girls who had babies during the semester. They had to work it out with the individual instructors as to when they would make up the assignments missed. They didn't get a "leave of absence", per se....they just took around 2 weeks off from actually attending class, but kept up with the assignments and still turned them in via e-mail. I hate to be the nay-sayer here, but since you are attending school online, other than maybe a week off (including the time you are in the hospital, if you deliver in one), I wouldn't expect an instructor to give me much more leeway in time off than that. Perhaps you can arrange to complete as many assignments as possible ahead of time so you don't fall so far behind. In my experience, the other option is to withdraw from classes for the semester, but I know you obviously don't want to do that. Good luck!

    Jimmie, mama to Zoey (March 2011)
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    Expecting another GIRL! Carter Grace due on 12/25.

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  • Oh what a total and inappropriate crock!

    I'm just starting a new Master's program (in person) and have a meeting today to talk with my advisor about how the heck to work things around the way my due date is a month before finals. At least for me, finishing two of my classes and taking incompletes for my other three (to finish between Dec and Feb) is the way to go, so it's just a matter of deciding which classes I want to finish and which will take temporary Is. While online ed might be different, I can't imagine that it would be impossible to try to arrange something similar with individual professors.

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  • That is ridiculous, and totally inappropriate, IMO.  I'm sorry, but schooling is no reason to even think about elective surgery. 

    I agree w/ pp - I would talk to the individual instructors if possible. When I was doing evening schooling, all the profs realized that we had lives outside of school (which was why we were all taking evening classes in the first place) and were very helpful if you had a serious reason for needing some sort of accommodation.  

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  • completely out of line.  Reminds me of a post yesterday on the single parents board where a girl who made the mistake of getting involved with a married man who got her pregnant was humbly looking for advice about her situation.  Right or wrong I dont think that is up for debate but now the chick has to take it from here. He is proposing they keep it a secret (nice let the kid be a dirty secret his/her whole life) and he will make sure she is supported. Yeah, he says that now...what happens when that puts his secret in jeopardy.  She admits to the wrongdoing but is now really wondering how best to proceed. A poster actually suggested that her best course of action was to abort the baby.

    I cannot imagine ever telling someone that...yeah it sucks the situation you are in so rather than holding the guy accountable...after all it is he that broke a vow not her (not that it makes her actions right or admirable) ....just terminate your child. amazing.

  • can you contact an attorney to find out what your options/"rights" really are? I wouldn't think they could get away with this (denying a leave). Or try what a PP suggested and go right to her supervisor - or even a board of directors for the U.

    And what she said about the c-section. She deserves a throat punch for that one....or a demonstration of what the five fingers say to the face.........

  • My Dh is a university prof and I can tell you saying stupid crap like that can get them sued.  The best course of action here is to play the affronted customer and go to the dean of students.  Tell him/her you will take your business elsewhere because of being treated like this.  They will more than likely bend over backward to help you.  If that doesn't work go in with a lawyer, just the mere presence of a lawyer should get you what you need.

     That being said:

    I'm not sure of my advice because this applies more to brick and mortar universities than online places who don't give a crap about you because there will always be another grant check to fill your seat.   So you may be SOL but you can sue her a$$ for being offensive.  That is why traditional universities will always be better. 

  • Wow.

    I would send your advisor a link to ICAN, tell her 'No, I'm not scheduling a c-section for a non-medical reason thankyouverymuch' and find out what you can do with each individual class to make sure you don't fall behind.  Otherwise, I would withdraw for the semester and pick back up the next.  I would also cc a copy to her boss/dean, tell her the comment about c-sections was highly inappropriate, especially since she isn't a birthing professional and ask to be reassigned to another advisor.

     

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  • I would report her to her supervisor and say you don't need a non medical professional telling you you need elective major abdominal surgery. I hate to think how many mom's have scheduled a c-section because of her inappropriate uneducated advice!
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  • Outrageous, but not too surprising in our culture that looks at c sections as an "easy fix" for all kinds of things. You might get the right time off, but you'll spend a lot more than that in recovery.
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  • That's completely insane.
    Traveling the world with my girls - born 12 months and 18 days apart.
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  • Wow. Just wow.  My grad program was very easy to work with.  I am actually deferring for a year to have enough time with Baby.  They would have easily given me 6 weeks in the middle of the semester though. It was my choice.  

    You should totally go the media with this.  University of Phoenix has been under so much fire lately that even just a reporter calling to inquire will probably get you what you want!   

    Interestingly, my degree will be in Higher Ed. Admin., and this is one issue that is extremely interesting to me.  As women are more and more a part of the workforce and the university system, there needs to be much more accommodation for families.   

  • Yikes! I dont even know how to respond to that except with disgust. *shakes head* At least you have the sense to not listen!
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  • Appaling. My DH is in media; he might just find this interesting.
    "Get your facts first. Then you can distort them as you please." ~ Mark Twain
  • imagepinkeggs:
    Appaling. My DH is in media; he might just find this interesting.

    The fact that this advisor showed such little respect for your body and your pregnancy is infuriating. I'm not really sure what the best course of action would be, but if you cannot resolve the issue peacefully with the advisor I would definitely go over her head.  There is no way in h*ll I would schedule a c-section to accommodate school - talk about a rough recovery!

  • I am aghast at her insensitivity. I think pps have offered many great solutions, so I won't even bother to repost, but just wanted to throw in my verbal support for you in this lame situation.
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