Babies: 9 - 12 Months

I feel like crying right now.

A friend on facebook is pregnant with baby number 2, her daughter is named Mia also and is 10 months old. this is her FB status

So i decided not to have this baby, yes i know sad :( but i been thinking alot and mia's is almost 10 months old and she's too little for me to have another one, plus i my plan was to have my 2nd child when mia was at least 3yrs old & on top of that i deserve to have sometime for myself and gets somethings done for me such as going to college ;)

I can understand why it wouldnt be best for her situation to bring another child into this life, but I personally hate abortion (i'm not trying to start fights with anyone) ... -sigh- I wish people like this realize that there are other options for a situation like hers.

And not only that, why put that all on facebook anyways? It's just heartbreaking to me.

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Re: I feel like crying right now.

  • Yes, that definitely is a bit much to share on FB...
  • It baffles me that people air all their crap out there on FB.?
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  • ITA with you...

    And that is way TMI for FB.  

    I'm very sad for that baby....

  • Seriously?  And posted on FB?  I don't even have words...

  • imageblushingbrideoct07:
    It baffles me that people air all their crap out there on FB.

    This.  Some things you can keep to yourself.

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  • Wow, that is definitely something I wouldn't think is appropriate for FB.  For one, abortion is a 'hot' issue and you are bound to upset some people over it, and it is just really sad.  Abortion aside, she should have used precautions against getting preg if she didn't want to.  There are really no accidents (unless she used birth control by the book and it didn't work).

    It is sad too for all the ladies who try so hard to get pregnant, and then there are irresponsible people getting preganant who shouldn't.

  • I tried to be nice and asked if she was going through adoption or abortion, she was like oh abortion im scared though I heard it can be dangerous.

    I said Yeah I heard it can sometimes prevent you from having kids in the future. maybe adoption would be better? I understand your concern for Mia and you're not ready for baby number 2, but maybe ou could really help a couple that cannot have a baby at all :)

    She goes, yeah but at the same time i dont want to have a baby 9 months in my stomach and then give away HELLL NO!

    And I said - There's always open adoption also, where you can totally be in the childs life. Just another option for you. :)

    -- I know i can't stop her, but at least I reminded her of another option. I fail. :(

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  • Crying That stuff always makes me sad. And why oh why would you put that on FB?!
  • Wow. That is a bit much to share. Very sad.

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  • imagemandaphilly:

    I tried to be nice and asked if she was going through adoption or abortion, she was like oh abortion im scared though I heard it can be dangerous.

    I said Yeah I heard it can sometimes prevent you from having kids in the future. maybe adoption would be better? I understand your concern for Mia and you're not ready for baby number 2, but maybe ou could really help a couple that cannot have a baby at all :)

    She goes, yeah but at the same time i dont want to have a baby 9 months in my stomach and then give away HELLL NO!

    And I said - There's always open adoption also, where you can totally be in the childs life. Just another option for you. :)

    -- I know i can't stop her, but at least I reminded her of another option. I fail. :(

    Maybe she will think about what you said. You can't be the only one reacting that way.

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  • you know what? stfu. you aren't in her shoes, you don't know how gut wrenching a decision this is for her, and it isn't your place AS HER FRIEND to judge or try to change her mind.

    I applaud her for knowing her own mind, making a SMART choice FOR HER and doing what is best for herself and her family.

    Accidents happen, people. That's why we have a CHOICE in this country.

    ANDALSO ... back alley abortions can cause problems. Abortions done in safe, clean clinics rarely lead to any type of future problems conceiving or giving birth. Educate yourself, don't fear monger.

  • That makes me so sad! Why air it on FB? Makes me wish that I could carry that baby for her and give it to someone who wants the baby! Why can't that be possible?

     

    Good for you for telling her there are other options!!

  • I tried to sound as nice as possible, but really I just want to be like 'WTF is wrong with you? So many people can't have babies out there and here you are having sex when you already know you are fertile hence already having a child and you're about to abort this one cause it's too much for you to handle? Yeah maybe it is but you should of thought about it before you decided to have unprotected sex. So instead of killing this child, maybe you should give it to somebody who CANNOT have a child at all?!"

    Ugh, calm down Amanda.

    Hopefully what I said to her, will spark something. I mean I truly can understand why she wouldn't be ready to have another one, she's in her 21 and as far as I know she is a single parent, but she also confirmed it's the same father as her daughter's also. But either way, if you can't handle it, give it to somebody who can.

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  • imagemandaphilly:

    I tried to be nice and asked if she was going through adoption or abortion, she was like oh abortion im scared though I heard it can be dangerous.

    I said Yeah I heard it can sometimes prevent you from having kids in the future. maybe adoption would be better? I understand your concern for Mia and you're not ready for baby number 2, but maybe ou could really help a couple that cannot have a baby at all :)

    She goes, yeah but at the same time i dont want to have a baby 9 months in my stomach and then give away HELLL NO!

    And I said - There's always open adoption also, where you can totally be in the childs life. Just another option for you. :)

    -- I know i can't stop her, but at least I reminded her of another option. I fail. :(

    I've never understood that argument...so you don't have the heart to carry a baby for 9 months and then give it away to a great, loving family...but you're able to kill it? I just don't get it. 

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  • imagejenerally?:

    you know what? stfu. you aren't in her shoes, you don't know how gut wrenching a decision this is for her, and it isn't your place AS HER FRIEND to judge or try to change her mind.

    I applaud her for knowing her own mind, making a SMART choice FOR HER and doing what is best for herself and her family.

    Accidents happen, people. That's why we have a CHOICE in this country.

    ANDALSO ... back alley abortions can cause problems. Abortions done in safe, clean clinics rarely lead to any type of future problems conceiving or giving birth. Educate yourself, don't fear monger.

    Thank god for one understanding and nonjudmental poster in the group.  I'm glad I don't have you for a friend.  Way to make your friend feel like crap in an already crappy situation.

    I agree that she shoudln't have posted it on FB.  It allows all sorts of judgmental jerks to give her grief.

  • imagejenerally?:

    you know what? stfu. you aren't in her shoes, you don't know how gut wrenching a decision this is for her, and it isn't your place AS HER FRIEND to judge or try to change her mind.

    I applaud her for knowing her own mind, making a SMART choice FOR HER and doing what is best for herself and her family.

    Accidents happen, people. That's why we have a CHOICE in this country.

    ANDALSO ... back alley abortions can cause problems. Abortions done in safe, clean clinics rarely lead to any type of future problems conceiving or giving birth. Educate yourself, don't fear monger.

    I agree with you in general, but the chick did post it on FB so she's inviting people's comments. I would think if it were a more painful, gut-wrenching decision, she'd be more private about it. I don't post my agony on FB - maybe that's just me.

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  • I am pro choice but I am also pro birth control and if she knew she did not want another one right now then she should have been responsible. And that is way TOO much information to be sharing on fb, this girl has issues.

  • I absolutely hate her reasoning for the abortion. She should have thought about all that, unless of course she was using bc properly and it failed, but even still the reasoning doesn't make any sense to me at all. How sad, I don't know how I would respond to that if she were my friend. If it were me though I'd keep my mouth shut, its nobody's business. Almost seems like she wants to get everyone riled up or needs advice?
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  • Someone needs to PUKE the word ADOPTION at her!  OVER AND OVER AGAIN. 

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  • imagemandaphilly:

    I tried to be nice and asked if she was going through adoption or abortion, she was like oh abortion im scared though I heard it can be dangerous.

    I said Yeah I heard it can sometimes prevent you from having kids in the future. maybe adoption would be better? I understand your concern for Mia and you're not ready for baby number 2, but maybe ou could really help a couple that cannot have a baby at all :)

    She goes, yeah but at the same time i dont want to have a baby 9 months in my stomach and then give away HELLL NO!

    And I said - There's always open adoption also, where you can totally be in the childs life. Just another option for you. :)

    -- I know i can't stop her, but at least I reminded her of another option. I fail. :(


    Quite frankly, it is none of your business and unless she specifically asked you for advise, you should have never meddled.   I simiply cannot stand the "give up for adoption, don't abort!" argument.  Is is not her responsibility to provide anyone with a baby.  Such an action must come from  the heart and not from guilt.  It sounds to me like she is doing what she believes is best for her and the child she already has.  Good for her for wanting to go to college.

     

     

  • imageBrittKav:
    imagemandaphilly:

    I tried to be nice and asked if she was going through adoption or abortion, she was like oh abortion im scared though I heard it can be dangerous.

    I said Yeah I heard it can sometimes prevent you from having kids in the future. maybe adoption would be better? I understand your concern for Mia and you're not ready for baby number 2, but maybe ou could really help a couple that cannot have a baby at all :)

    She goes, yeah but at the same time i dont want to have a baby 9 months in my stomach and then give away HELLL NO!

    And I said - There's always open adoption also, where you can totally be in the childs life. Just another option for you. :)

    -- I know i can't stop her, but at least I reminded her of another option. I fail. :(

    I've never understood that argument...so you don't have the heart to carry a baby for 9 months and then give it away to a great, loving family...but you're able to kill it? I just don't get it. 

     

    Not everyone believes abortion is murder.

  • imagemrskadams:
    imagejenerally?:

    you know what? stfu. you aren't in her shoes, you don't know how gut wrenching a decision this is for her, and it isn't your place AS HER FRIEND to judge or try to change her mind.

    I applaud her for knowing her own mind, making a SMART choice FOR HER and doing what is best for herself and her family.

    Accidents happen, people. That's why we have a CHOICE in this country.

    ANDALSO ... back alley abortions can cause problems. Abortions done in safe, clean clinics rarely lead to any type of future problems conceiving or giving birth. Educate yourself, don't fear monger.

    Thank god for one understanding and nonjudmental poster in the group.  I'm glad I don't have you for a friend.  Way to make your friend feel like crap in an already crappy situation.

    I agree that she shoudln't have posted it on FB.  It allows all sorts of judgmental jerks to give her grief.

    Really?? If she responded the way she says she did I think she was a great friend, obviously the chick wanted to open it up for discussion if she posted it on FB. I would have asked the same questions and said the same things.....she posted it for everyone to read for god sake! She obviously needed something 

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  • Manda, I'm glad you tried talking with her about it.  I would love to adopt a child one day (RPL and IF) and I know there are too many people out there like me...

    And as for the other posters -- yep she put it on FB and that opens it all up.  Just like if you post something here. 

  • You have said way too much for to your friend. Back off.
  • imageMrsJuneHawk:
    imageBrittKav:
    imagemandaphilly:

    I tried to be nice and asked if she was going through adoption or abortion, she was like oh abortion im scared though I heard it can be dangerous.

    I said Yeah I heard it can sometimes prevent you from having kids in the future. maybe adoption would be better? I understand your concern for Mia and you're not ready for baby number 2, but maybe ou could really help a couple that cannot have a baby at all :)

    She goes, yeah but at the same time i dont want to have a baby 9 months in my stomach and then give away HELLL NO!

    And I said - There's always open adoption also, where you can totally be in the childs life. Just another option for you. :)

    -- I know i can't stop her, but at least I reminded her of another option. I fail. :(

    I've never understood that argument...so you don't have the heart to carry a baby for 9 months and then give it away to a great, loving family...but you're able to kill it? I just don't get it. 

     

    Not everyone believes abortion is murder.

    Totally off topic, but can I ask what "For Gary" means? 

  • choice is one thing, but why the heck would you go on FB and post that. seriously attention whoring if you ask me.
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  • imageJLS0320:
    imagemrskadams:
    imagejenerally?:

    you know what? stfu. you aren't in her shoes, you don't know how gut wrenching a decision this is for her, and it isn't your place AS HER FRIEND to judge or try to change her mind.

    I applaud her for knowing her own mind, making a SMART choice FOR HER and doing what is best for herself and her family.

    Accidents happen, people. That's why we have a CHOICE in this country.

    ANDALSO ... back alley abortions can cause problems. Abortions done in safe, clean clinics rarely lead to any type of future problems conceiving or giving birth. Educate yourself, don't fear monger.

    Thank god for one understanding and nonjudmental poster in the group.  I'm glad I don't have you for a friend.  Way to make your friend feel like crap in an already crappy situation.

    I agree that she shoudln't have posted it on FB.  It allows all sorts of judgmental jerks to give her grief.

    Really?? If she responded the way she says she did I think she was a great friend, obviously the chick wanted to open it up for discussion if she posted it on FB. I would have asked the same questions and said the same things.....she posted it for everyone to read for god sake! She obviously needed something 


    Where did she ask for advice?  She was just TELLING people what she was going to do.  She had made up her mind, she was not asking anyone for their two cents.

  • imagemrskadams:
    imagejenerally?:

    you know what? stfu. you aren't in her shoes, you don't know how gut wrenching a decision this is for her, and it isn't your place AS HER FRIEND to judge or try to change her mind.

    I applaud her for knowing her own mind, making a SMART choice FOR HER and doing what is best for herself and her family.

    Accidents happen, people. That's why we have a CHOICE in this country.

    ANDALSO ... back alley abortions can cause problems. Abortions done in safe, clean clinics rarely lead to any type of future problems conceiving or giving birth. Educate yourself, don't fear monger.

    Thank god for one understanding and nonjudmental poster in the group.  I'm glad I don't have you for a friend.  Way to make your friend feel like crap in an already crappy situation.

    I agree that she shoudln't have posted it on FB.  It allows all sorts of judgmental jerks to give her grief.

    To each their own I guess.

    I wasn't a biitch about it. Yes I do agree we have choices, adoption is one of them.  In my very humble opinion it's the better option from the two. And I can understand her situation, bringing in another baby would probably not be the ideal situation for her right now that's why I mentioned adoption to her because it's another choice to consider.

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  • imagejenerally?:

    you know what? stfu. you aren't in her shoes, you don't know how gut wrenching a decision this is for her, and it isn't your place AS HER FRIEND to judge or try to change her mind.

    I applaud her for knowing her own mind, making a SMART choice FOR HER and doing what is best for herself and her family.

    Accidents happen, people. That's why we have a CHOICE in this country.

    ANDALSO ... back alley abortions can cause problems. Abortions done in safe, clean clinics rarely lead to any type of future problems conceiving or giving birth. Educate yourself, don't fear monger.

    she put it on FB for all to see,  which makes me think she might be reaching out for someone to change her mind and she opening it up for all types of opinions.  YOU aren't walking in her shoes either.  Yes, we have choices in this country, but sometimes there are better choices to be made.  Manda isn't judging her ... she's informing her of another choice.

  • imageLucky428:
    imageMrsJuneHawk:
    imageBrittKav:
    imagemandaphilly:

    I tried to be nice and asked if she was going through adoption or abortion, she was like oh abortion im scared though I heard it can be dangerous.

    I said Yeah I heard it can sometimes prevent you from having kids in the future. maybe adoption would be better? I understand your concern for Mia and you're not ready for baby number 2, but maybe ou could really help a couple that cannot have a baby at all :)

    She goes, yeah but at the same time i dont want to have a baby 9 months in my stomach and then give away HELLL NO!

    And I said - There's always open adoption also, where you can totally be in the childs life. Just another option for you. :)

    -- I know i can't stop her, but at least I reminded her of another option. I fail. :(

    I've never understood that argument...so you don't have the heart to carry a baby for 9 months and then give it away to a great, loving family...but you're able to kill it? I just don't get it. 

     

    Not everyone believes abortion is murder.

    Totally off topic, but can I ask what "For Gary" means? 


    Gary is a friend's husband who died of lymphoma earlier this year.

  • imagemandaphilly:

    To each their own I guess.

    I wasn't a biitch about it. Yes I do agree we have choices, adoption is one of them.  In my very humble opinion it's the better option from the two. And I can understand her situation, bringing in another baby would probably not be the ideal situation for her right now that's why I mentioned adoption to her because it's another choice to consider.

    You didn't just mention it....you tried to ram it down her throat. I can't imagine how difficult of a decision this is without someone like you trying to put her own 2 cents in.

  • imagemandaphilly:
    imagemrskadams:
    imagejenerally?:

    you know what? stfu. you aren't in her shoes, you don't know how gut wrenching a decision this is for her, and it isn't your place AS HER FRIEND to judge or try to change her mind.

    I applaud her for knowing her own mind, making a SMART choice FOR HER and doing what is best for herself and her family.

    Accidents happen, people. That's why we have a CHOICE in this country.

    ANDALSO ... back alley abortions can cause problems. Abortions done in safe, clean clinics rarely lead to any type of future problems conceiving or giving birth. Educate yourself, don't fear monger.

    Thank god for one understanding and nonjudmental poster in the group.  I'm glad I don't have you for a friend.  Way to make your friend feel like crap in an already crappy situation.

    I agree that she shoudln't have posted it on FB.  It allows all sorts of judgmental jerks to give her grief.

    To each their own I guess.

    I wasn't a biitch about it. Yes I do agree we have choices, adoption is one of them.  In my very humble opinion it's the better option from the two. And I can understand her situation, bringing in another baby would probably not be the ideal situation for her right now that's why I mentioned adoption to her because it's another choice to consider.

     

    You may think what you want but it is NOT YOUR choice to make.

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  • You mean it's the better option for YOU.  Not everyone feels that way and it's not your place to judge her for her decisions.  I'm sure she's well aware that she could carry to term and put up for adoption.  Shame on you for not being a true friend and just being there for her.
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  • I love how people think that there are couples lining up outside of orphanages to adopt children. The ignorance surrounding the process is astounding.

    Yes, please add one more child to the millions of children out there with no parents and no real home. They will surely be snapped up immediately by Mr. and Mrs. Cleaver.

  • imageEbethM0231:
    imagejenerally?:

    you know what? stfu. you aren't in her shoes, you don't know how gut wrenching a decision this is for her, and it isn't your place AS HER FRIEND to judge or try to change her mind.

    I applaud her for knowing her own mind, making a SMART choice FOR HER and doing what is best for herself and her family.

    Accidents happen, people. That's why we have a CHOICE in this country.

    ANDALSO ... back alley abortions can cause problems. Abortions done in safe, clean clinics rarely lead to any type of future problems conceiving or giving birth. Educate yourself, don't fear monger.

    she put it on FB for all to see,  which makes me think she might be reaching out for someone to change her mind and she opening it up for all types of opinions.  YOU aren't walking in her shoes either.  Yes, we have choices in this country, but sometimes there are better choices to be made.  Manda isn't judging her ... she's informing her of another choice.

     

    THIS

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  • op ~ I feel like crying right now, too. CAUSE YOU ARE SO EFFING STUPID. ::lean closer to my computer so I can punch you in the face:: thanks ya twat!

  • Based on how she said it and the fact that she posted it on FB, she is taking the situation and the act of abortion WAY too lightly!

    Regardless of anyone's belief's it's a serious subject and shouldn't be casually mentioned in a FB status post! 

    That being said, I wish I could carry that baby for her too! That baby didn't do anything to deserve to be killed so casually! 

    I'll be praying for her and that baby! 

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  • imageInternetExplorer:

    Quiz time, teenagers

     

     

    Which has more potential to impact your future fertility statistically:

     

    a. abortion/termination surg or non surg

    b. childbirth

      

    b cuz b is for b itch

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