So my friend messaged me and told me that I should come to the bar with them tonight...if any of you have been to AZ...mill avenue is basically a strip of bars FILLED with college kids.
I said. "Oh yeah that would be really classy...a pregnant chick in a bar!"
She didn't understand why I thought it was strange....and was uncomfortable going and said "Well you're just so lame now!" ....uuhh thanks?
Maybe I am way too judgy but if I were walking around down there I would be giving someone the side eye who was pregnant. I don't know how many times I used to go down there and get elbowed or almost knocked over, and that was BEFORE I was pregnant and clumsy! haha
Some people just don't get how paranoid being pregnant makes you!
*I'm not referring to regular bars...i'm talking the rowdy crowded college bars!
Re: Going to a bar while pregnant??
I've gone to the bar several times. But only non-smoking. And I have never judged a pg lady at the bar. If that's where your friends are what the heck is wrong with hanging out with them?
I wouldn't be going to a strictly bar just for the hell of it, but I am going out for a bachelorette party next weekend, but I think that situation is a little different.
I wouldn't really give someone the side eye for being in a bar and pg unless they were acting ridiculous and out of control.
A couple of years back, I saw a hugely pregnant girl (and I mean girl) in a bar that was filled with smoke and extremely loud music (I just think it can't be comfy for baby). Yeah, she looked reallllly klassy.
I go meet my friends out at a bar almost every weekend. I end up not staying late becuase I get tired but I still go and have fun. Once LO comes I won't be going out so I want to enjoy it while I can.
I don't think it's a big deal and your friend wants to spend time with you. Can you sit down somewhere? Maybe on a stool?
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this! I went out all the time when I was pregnant with DD. I never did the whole nightclub scene, but that's not my thing anyway. If we get a sitter now and friends call, we go out. I even have a non-alcoholic beer every now and then. Now that must look real classy!
As long as the pregnant chick isn't smoking and doing shots of jager who cares?
No where they are going is all pretty much standing room only bars and you are always fighting your way through the crowd down there. It's not like these are laid back bars or I would be more okay with it....
I probably wouldn't go somewhere like that, but only because I wouldn't go somewhere like that if I wasn't pregnant. Maybe you could suggest a different place.
**Happily ignores your side eye while donning flame-retardant suit**
I am that girl. My baby's future godparents happen to own a bar, and I am usually there at least 2 nights a week. All the guys know I'm expecting, but everything is business as usual (minus the drinks, of course). I still chill and play cards with the guys, and everyone knows that when the salsa music plays, DH and I still own the dance floor. My doctor thinks it's great that I'm still active, and says that as long as I feel up to it, to go for it.
That being said, your friend with her "you're so lame" sounds like a peach. If you're not up to it, you're just going to be uncomfortable all night and not enjoy yourself at all. PG or not, that's no fun, and doesn't make you lame at all for wanting to skip it.
Then I can see why you wouldn't want to go. Don't be ashamed of going tho. Can you suggest another bar? Or go out with them to a different place before they go out to the clubs?
Married 8.13.2005, M/C 12/8/06- 5 weeks, M/C 2/27/07- 7 weeks, M/C w/ D&C 8/10/09-6.5 weeks *Charles Lawrence born 5/2/08 @ 3:14am, 7lb 8oz, 20.5 inches. Clomid, Crinone and baby aspirin. *Alexandra Claire born 9/14/10 @ 9:52am 6lb 14oz, 20.5 inches. Femara, Crinone and baby aspirin.
I tried that and they said they don't want to change their plans. I told them to not be "lame" haha Oh well, looks like the boyfriend and I will be having a date night!
If it's a "college bar" scene with rowdy people (where you could get pushed or bumped hard) then I probably wouldn't go but if it was a normal, non smoking bar I wouldn't think twice about going.
Aiden 10.17.07 Emma 07.15.10
That's pretty much how I feel.....in my OP I wasn't referring to regular calm bars...i'm talking the crazy college bars.
I've gone to plenty of bars while being visibly pregnant. My friends go out a lot and I enjoy catching up with them.
I really don't see anything wrong with it. It's not as fun as it would be. But I don't side-eye pregnant who go to bars. I assume they're just drinking sodas.
Off to the beach
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I go to the bar every other weekend with my girlfriends. It's nice to get out of the house. We usually just go to our local pub which is super mellow most of the time. I would never be caught dead in a rowdy place. There's no way I'd feel safe, or comfortable.
ETA: I only will go to the non-smoking bars.
I don't think that's what your OP was saying at all
Maybe I am way too judgy but if I were walking around down there I would be giving someone the side eye who was pregnant. I don't know how many times I used to go down there and get elbowed or almost knocked over, and that was BEFORE I was pregnant and clumsy! haha
So you judge them for going bc they are not taking their safety (it being crowded and possibly getting knocked over) seriously?? Maybe they are not as clumsy as you....
No. Me thinks you judge pg women at bars, period.
Personally I can't STAND going to the bars at Mill Ave! I always run into college-aged liberals who think they're better than me because they go to ASU and I decided to work. (Bought my first house at age 21 while everyone else works at Subway to pay off student loans. Ba-zing!!)
That being said!
I don't think it's strange at all to go to a bar while pregnant! Yeah, it's a bummer that you can't drink, but go out and rock that bump!!
Well, then you would be wrong.
amen! i was out saturday with friends and i would have gone to a bar, but they kept refusing to let us in because of their baby.
You could always try to talk them into going to one of the more laid-back bars on Mill, like Tavern. Depending on how early you go, there are usually a few tables available to sit down at. And of course there are the restaurants like Ra and Macayo's (mmm...green corn tamales with Baja sauce...).
I don't think the general idea of a pregnant woman in a bar is all that bad. After all, just because we're pregnant doesn't mean we can't enjoy some social time! But that's just my opinion ) As long as you'll be comfortable, I say go for it!
yep, you're judgmental alright. she was asleep, in a car seat, with a blanket over her.
why exactly is that so awful? all bars in cali are nonsmoking.
I went out to the bars for BIL's 21st birthday when I was pg with DD. Yeah, it sucked being in a smoke filled bar with a bunch of college kids, but I kind of had to go.
If I wasn't too exhausted to stay up past 10:00, I would go out to the bars with my friends, provided they picked ones that aren't generally too smokey.
So excited for the smoking ban to go into effect in Wisconsin this summer!
Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
I'm not even going there with you...you might try to post some "research" as to why it's okay. I'm not judging. but the bar obviously saw something wrong with it...i'm just saying wouldn't do it. That is all.
yeah, the bar was clearly worried about wrecking the ambiance for people like you who wouldn't go anyway.
uummmm okay?
seriously, there's no smoking. the music was a decent volume and the baby was asleep.
why is that a problem?
My favorite bar in Milwaukee is non-smoking (the rest of the state isn't until July) and they even have toys for kids. I love it! It's in walking distance and I would have no problem taking a baby there. It's not like we go out to get wasted, anyway.
yeah, like i said, it says that they're worried about what judgmental people like yourself would think.
giving the side eye to pregnant women AND babies. nice!