February 2013 Moms

Breast Feeding Guilt

My hubby and I have scheduled our first trip away from baby boy for our wedding anniversary in October.  After thinking about it long and hard, I decided that would be a good target date to transition from breast milk to formula so that it was not a hassle to travel and pump.  Our son will be 8 months old and firmly on the path. To solids by then so ore than likely he will. Only require a couple of bottles a day to fill in gaps.  Outside of the trip, it is becoming increasingly difficult to pump at work and as many of you know, the time spent cleaning equipment, bagging and freezing expressed milk and preparing the next day's bottles from daycare is no simple task to perform after a long work day.  While all the influencing factors point to making the transition away from breast feeding and I know that he will have had 8 solid months of breastfeeding I feel incredibly guilty about switching to formula.  Anyone else experience the "formula guilt"?  

Re: Breast Feeding Guilt

  • jd614jd614
    250 Answers 100 Comments First Anniversary 5 Love Its
    member
    I had to stop EBF abruptly at 10 weeks when I had an abscess that turned out to be mrsa . I had a week stash in my freezer but then had to give formula due to all the meds
    I was on and the fact that I was in the hospital . I was devastated bc I so badly wanted to go 6 mos. I started DS on enfamil gentlease and he was thriving so much it made me feel so much better. He took to it right away, gained weight like a champ and even started STTN 2
    Weeks later. The truth is the way formula is made now there are so many nutrients and its very beneficial . You are an amazing mom and did a wonderful thing for ur son for 8 mos. now go enjoy some freedom with ur hubby without worrying about being attached to ur pump. You deserve it!
  • I agree with PP - I EP'd until DS was 7 weeks old and several doctors told me to stop due to low supply and repeated mastitis.  If you'd asked me when I was pregnant, I would have said that nothing but breast milk would pass my baby's lips until 6 months.  But then reality hits and you do what you have to.  You'll have done 8 months, which is wonderful (and WAY more than I was able to do).  DS does great on formula, we use Similac Advance, but my OB said that they're all good.

    Rule #1 is to feed the baby, whether is BM or formula doesn't matter as much, especially at that age.  

     

    Like PP said, you deserve the break!

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  • Try not to feel guilty, although I completely understand your feelings. There's nothing wrong with formula, and I have a tough time pumping at work too. 

    I wasn't sure about one thing though: you said he should only require a couple of bottles to fill in the gaps. From what I know, that's not really how it should be at 8 months. I've always heard that formula or breast milk should make up most of baby's calories until LO is 1 year old. Solids before then are mostly for fun or practice. Formula or BM also provides hydration since before 1 year old they shouldn't be getting a whole lot of water or cow's milk. 

    PCOS with long, irregular cycles
    First round of Clomid in May 2012= BFP #1, DD born January 2013 :)
    BFP #2 on 1/3/14, EDD 9/13/14- Team Blue! 

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  • I only nursed DS for the first 7-8 weeks. I had low supply and terrible anxiety over his feedings. It was the best choice for my family to switch to formula. I had a lot of guilt as well, but the worst of it was when I was contemplating stopping. When I actually made the switch I felt like a huge weight was lifted. 

    I originally wanted to BF longer and sometimes I wish it worked out and I feel bad, but when I see how well DS is doing I know I made the right decision. Like what PP said - sometimes things don't go according to our plan. However,I think things do end up working out in the end.

    At 8 months of nursing I would give yourself a huge pat on the back! 

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  • SagenSagen
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    I had to supplement with my third at 9 months because my supply was crap and nothing I did would make it go up. I did nurse to a  year, but he had a mix of formula, solids, and some nursing. One thing that was hard about going to formula at that age when they have been breastfed is that some babies would rather be hungry than eat formula because it doesn't taste as good. I took my son to the Drs and he was dx as failure to thrive. I told the doctor I had tried every single brand of formula out there, he wouldn't take any of them. The doctor told me to mix it with carnations instant breakfast, just a little, then slowly take it out. So after adding chocolate carnations he took it and regained his weight he lost in a month. I slowly stopped adding the flavoring, and eventually he liked formula. My advice is if your planning on weaning to formula in a few months, perhaps you can try a little now when he would be more flexible. If you get to the point where he flat out refuses it, you can do what I did in a bind. I am sure it is not good to give babies chocolate formula, but being dx with FTT, I would take that over nothing in my case :) Hopefully you won't run into problems, good luck! Also don't feel guilty :)
    August Sig. man crush
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    Mom to 4 cute kids! 10 yo girl 8 yo boy 6 yo boy and a 1.5 yo boy!
  • SagenSagen
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    image kleigh926:

    Try not to feel guilty, although I completely understand your feelings. There's nothing wrong with formula, and I have a tough time pumping at work too. 

    I wasn't sure about one thing though: you said he should only require a couple of bottles to fill in the gaps. From what I know, that's not really how it should be at 8 months. I've always heard that formula or breast milk should make up most of baby's calories until LO is 1 year old. Solids before then are mostly for fun or practice. Formula or BM also provides hydration since before 1 year old they shouldn't be getting a whole lot of water or cow's milk. 

     

    ITA :)

    August Sig. man crush
     image
    Mom to 4 cute kids! 10 yo girl 8 yo boy 6 yo boy and a 1.5 yo boy!
  • image Drea926:

    I only nursed DS for the first 7-8 weeks. I had low supply and terrible anxiety over his feedings. It was the best choice for my family to switch to formula. I had a lot of guilt as well, but the worst of it was when I was contemplating stopping. When I actually made the switch I felt like a huge weight was lifted. 

    I originally wanted to BF longer and sometimes I wish it worked out and I feel bad, but when I see how well DS is doing I know I made the right decision. Like what PP said - sometimes things don't go according to our plan. However,I think things do end up working out in the end.

    At 8 months of nursing I would give yourself a huge pat on the back! 

    all of this exactly.  


    I may be a big ol B sometimes… but...
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  • I had/have terrible formula guilt. Switching to formula has been clearly the right decision for my family, but it has taken me two months to wean because I keep changing my mind. My quality of life is suffering because I am unable to take medication that I should be taking because of BFing. I finally took it last night, so this is really the end this time! I'm hoping, like PP have said, that it will get easier as time goes on. The process of drying up and seeing my milk go away and knowing that I won't get it back is really hard for me.

    However, I keep trying to look at the big picture. Will I care about this in a year? Probably not. Is he going to berate me when he grows up for not BFing longer? Not a chance. He got my milk for 5 months and I'm proud of that. We all just do the best we can for our babies! But you aren't alone with the guilt. I hope that it passes quickly for you. Congrats on making it so far!

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