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Yes...especially when someone is trying to manuever a stroller through a door! I can't tell you how many times people have let the door slam shut in my face instead of holding it for me.
It depends on the type of help needed and whether LO was in a cooperative mood.
If LO is having a good day (meaning everything is running smoothly), it's a great opportunity for a teachable moment to help others. If LO is on the brink of a meltdown, then I've got my own stuff to deal with-- too much to help someone else.
Now, if the person needing help was in truly dire need of help-- like a medical emergency or lost a kid/caregiver-- of course I'd stop to help if no one else was helping. But if it's just a matter of courtesy to return their cart to the corral for them or help carry bags for an elderly person or help finding a product on the store shelves, then see above conditions...
Love, luck, and prayers to my BFPB Dr. SnowflakeBride
FarmerMcDonald:I'm curious, what happened?
Sorry its kinda long:
We were in the checkout line with a younger (late teens early twenties) boy dressed as a girl in front of us. It was pretty clear she was nervous since there was a lot of staring/finger pointing. When she got to pay, she didnt have enough money. She maybe had $7. The total was only about 15ish dollars. The cashier, IMO, was being short and rude. She had the basics in her bag. Some juice/water, pita bread, jam and a few granola like bars. From her appearance, one might assume she wasnt that well off and doesnt possibly eat much. I could tell she was embarrased/uncomfortable and the cashier kept calling her SIR very loudly as she tried to go through the bag and take things out to get the total lower. I just stepped up, told the bagger to put everything back in the bag and said I would pay for it. She looked at me stunned (this entire time she barely spoke above a whisper)
The cashier got rude and said I didnt/shouldnt do that. I told her to take the money, bag the groceries and I was more than happy to help. After the young girl left, the cashier asked me why in the world I would do that, and I just responded "we teach our children to be nice to one another, and as adults we somehow forget that lesson". That shut her up.
THEN, a guy behind me (30's buff nice looking with a toddler) spoke up in tears and told me he hoped that if his son was ever in a situation like that, that someone would be there to help him. Another lady with a child echoed this. Another man with a teen aged girl helped me unload my cart onto the belt.
During the whole thing, I didnt really think much of it. I just wanted to be helpful and felt empathetic. Afterwards is when I noticed that the only people noticing the situation and taking time to comment or help were those with children. The grocery store was packed.
Oh and I have to mention while this was happening, E had decided to pick up and eat a banana. Whoops. Maybe I should have been watching my own child!
Great story E!
kofmkg:What a nice gesture, C!nbsp; Proud that you did it and proud that others also noticed your generosity.
"we teach our children to be nice to one another, and as adults we somehow forget that lesson".
AMEN! Good for you, that story made my heart happy. :)
I wouldn't say that I've become more compassionate since having kids, I've just become more aware of things and situations. Does that make sense?
Kaiterz:"we teach our children to be nice to one another, and as adults we somehow forget that lesson".AMEN! Good for you, that story made my heart happy. :) I wouldn't say that I've become more compassionate since having kids, I've just become more aware of things and situations. Does that make sense?
I feel like this is it! Maybe as mothers we notice more?
I realize now more often, how each person is someone's son/daughter.
burkems:I have goosebumps C. I am tearing up. I hope I get that opportunity someday and that I do the same as you.
Aw I am sure you would!
Like I said, at the time I didnt think much of it. I just kind of reacted and stepped in as E rummaged and ate thing in our cari :)
C, that is awesome! Good for you!
I am way more empathetic since having M, and now that I'm ready to pop with our new lo, I'm very conscious of it. Just this month at Target a mom and her teenager were in line behind me, and the mom tells her daughter, "get the stuff off the bottom of her cart," and she did, so I didn't have to bend over with my giant belly. It was too sweet.
That said, this weekend I was in our local grocery store, and I had put my diaper bag on the bottom of the cart and almost immediately, the strap falls down, I run over it, and it gets tangled. Then I have to get down, sit on the ground and try to untangle it. Several people were walking around, but nobody stopped. I wish I'd had that teenager and her mom with me then!!
I don't know that it makes me more compassionate, but maybe as I do something with my kids in tow I dialog why we do things for others to make sure they see and hear and connect the dots.
I'm so glad you showed kindness - I hate when I see people being mean to others.
Your story brought tears to my eye C! Good for you and even though E was probably unaware, if he even heard one iota of it, I'm sure it made an impression.
I like to think that I was just as empathetic prior to kids as I am now, in respect to helping people in need, but one difference would be in the way I think - this is someone's baby.
I just watched Free Willy over the weekend (got all 4 for 9 something bucks at Wal-Mart wha hoo!) and seeing Jesse as a homeless kid in the beginning, ugh, I could have bawled my eyes out.
I work a couple blocks from a homeless shelter and seeing the people all over on the streets in the summertime just about breaks my heart.
Good for you for helping that woman out, and I'd probably call the grocery store manager about the cashier. It should not have been his place to tell you not to pay - as long as someone paid, he should keep his mouth shut!
What a great story - thanks for sharing! I hope that in a similar situation, I would react the same way.
I don't know if having a child has made me more compassionate, but it has made me more aware of situations. Unfortunately, I think age and parenthood has made me more leery of people and their intentions in situations where I may be called upon to help. Random situations where no one is asking for help, sure, I think I'm more compassionate and in a better place to help (financially, etc), but I'm equally less apt to help those that come up to me asking for assistance.
C, you rock! I also had tears in my eyes reading your story.
I think that I probably am more willing to help now that I'm a mom, but it is not necessarily that I am more compassionate. I think I am now more willing to engage and talk to others. With a little one, people talk to me more andI've gotten more comfortable with talking to strangers, including asking them for or offering help. It's like there was a social wall up previously (in my mind at least), and it was sometimes hard to talk to strangers. Now I don't even think about it usually.