February 2013 Moms

Everyone says...

that I need to leave LO with DH for a whole day. They think it would be good for him to have to do everything, and nice for me to get a break. And while all that's true, I just don't want to! For one thing, I EBF so I'd have to pump all day, so it's not that much of a break. But that aside, I'd really miss LO! Any time I'm away from him for like 3 hours, I start to get really antsy and all I want to do is go home and be with him. 

Luckily, DH agrees with me. He says little babies need to be with their mommies, and once he's a bit older, he'll be happy to take him for a whole day or more.

I guess I'm just very attached. 

Re: Everyone says...

  • I feel the same way!
    Jenny DiLo
  • Count me in.  My MIL keeps asking us to leave the baby with her overnight and I'm like yeah, not happening.  I too BF and besides it being a total pain in the I have no desire to be away from my kid for that long.  I guess some mom's need the time to themselves ( I totally get that no judgment from me) I'm just not there yet.
  • I'm a working mom, so I'm away from my girl 10-11 hours every day...  I also EP, so I'm pumping whether I'm with DD or not.  I get up at 5am, leave by 5:50am.  DH typically works 11am/12p-8:30p.  So I leave her with him every morning.  She's up anywhere from 6:30am-9am.  (We haven't put her on a schedule since DH likes to see her when he gets home from work at 9pm and it hasn't phased her.)  DH then drops her at daycare sometime before noon and I pick her up at 4:30pm.  On weekends I pretty much spend all day with her (unless I run to the store like I did today).  I miss her like CRAZY all week and love being with her.  

    I think you should do whatever works for you and your DH!  If you don't feel like you need a break, I think that's okay. :)  
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I am of two minds about this. I EBF, so I agree pumping all day is not my idea of fun. I also miss my LOs while I am away. In those respects, I agree with you.

    I do also think DH needs time with the baby. I know my DH likes to have a little daddy time with the kids. Our LOs are 5 months old, so they aren't tiny newborns anymore. Yes, they do need mommy, but they also need bonding time with dad.

    I don't know if you need a whole day or weekend away, but maybe some girl time with friends. Or a nice hour or two to treat yourself to a mani/pedi or something else you like to do. If you time it right, you wouldn't even need to pump.

    Balance is always important. 

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  • I definitely agree about the pumping part. I have no desire to be away from DD for any longer than I have to while she's still nursing. I hate pumping!
    After we're done BF'ing though, I may be more inclined to leave her with DH for a little longer. But honestly, I do miss her when I'm not with her. Sometimes I even miss her when she takes a really long nap. I'm in no hurry to leave her overnight anytime soon.
    PCOS with long, irregular cycles
    First round of Clomid in May 2012= BFP #1, DD born January 2013 :)
    BFP #2 on 1/3/14, EDD 9/13/14- Team Blue! 

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  • image beanersmommy:
    I am of two minds about this. I EBF, so I agree pumping all day is not my idea of fun. I also miss my LOs while I am away. In those respects, I agree with you.I do also think DH needs time with the baby. I know my DH likes to have a little daddy time with the kids. Our LOs are 5 months old, so they aren't tiny newborns anymore. Yes, they do need mommy, but they also need bonding time with dad.I don't know if you need a whole day or weekend away, but maybe some girl time with friends. Or a nice hour or two to treat yourself to a mani/pedi or something else you like to do. If you time it right, you wouldn't even need to pump.Balance is always important.nbsp;


    Oh I definitely take a couple hours here and there and hang out with my girlfriends and whatnot. But more than about 23 hours the same amount if time between feedings... Coincidence? and I really start to feel the pull.

    And I'm definitely all about DH bonding with the baby and he certainly does. He's a musician with no day job so he gets lots of time with LO.
  • I did this today. DH had DD all day and I took DS to the beach. Everyone had a wonderful day. Daddy and baby had lots cuddles and DS got to do some "big boy" things. As much as I didn't want to leave her all day, it ended up being good for everyone

     

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  • Don't let other people pressure you.  I wasn't away from Jack for a "whole day" until he was over a year old and wasn't nursing as much.  Pumping is a PAIN.  If you want the break, by all means take it.  But don't feel like you have to do this just bc people are telling you you should.
    Missed m/c discovered 3/15/12 at 8w2d: "Henry."

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  • I agree that you need to do what you feel comfortable with, but I have a new perspective after leaving LO for four days.  It wasn't the catastrophe I had imagined, and I learned that I was actually feeling burnt out (even though I didn't know it before I left) and I needed the time away.  It wasn't even as hard as I thought.  DH and LO had a fantastic time together, and I could tell after coming home that their bond was stronger. 

    I think it's good that you are taking small breaks away, and if you truly are doing well mentally and emotionally, then by all means, don't feel like you "have" to do anything.  If it's the pumping that is keeping you from going away for the day, could you do an afternoon and overnight at a resort or hotel with girlfriends?  Then you are near a convenient place to pump and can excuse yourself to go pump without it being a big deal.  I agree, though, that pumping is a pain.

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  • I agree, OP

    I want a day off but I am way too attached to DD and I think she is too. I tried to go to a movie and I was sad and leaking and she cried herself to sleep while I was gone.

    I think we're attached at the hip for at least the next few months if not her whole first year.

    I wish DH could be mommy, but he can't. The best he can do is to be daddy and give me an hour or two break every once in a while.

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