March 2014 Moms

Confessions of an early announcer

Hello,

My name is Gisa and I'm an early announcer.

I announced as soon as I found out with all three of my pregnancies and every time I see someone side-eye another person for announcing early I get pissed. I am comfortable announcing before 12 weeks and it doesn't make me shitttty or irresponsible. I'm not setting myself up for something bad to happen. There is no shame in announcing early. That may be a UO.

i wish i could be joking but my dad is the music teacher at a church so he owuld be mad. we had sex, all the time how bad i know but we dont want to wait and he said GREAT OH KAY! and I was really feeling the wets? down there- too embarsed to say- but he acted like man.
Laura8388BrideNamedMegmrsdahammbarbie216
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Re: Confessions of an early announcer

  • Completely agree. People should announce when they want to announce. Telling or not telling doesn't change the outcome of a pregnancy and things can still go wrong even announcing after 12 weeks. Congratulations and announce away! I am 7 weeks and most everyone knows, mostly because I need the support for my PgAL brain and anxiety.
    Married 11/23/11, TTC starting 10/12, BFP#1 11/30/12, Adoption of stepson finalized 03/19/13,Loss of our daughter at 20w4d due to incompetent cervix 03/27/13, BFP#2 06/28/13, DS2 born 3/1/14.

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  • Yes I know what you mean, we've always announced our new babies as soon as we found out. If you lose a baby it's hard either way! And just because you wait til your 13 weeks doesn't mean something couldn't happen after that! Of course everyone can do what they want, but I'm always way too excited to keep it to myself! People would just think I was crazy for smiling so much lol
    fat2fitnessmodel
  • Last time around, I called my mom the day I got a positive test. I thought I was farther along (based on LMP), and mentioned maybe telling people on Easter... well, she called half the family to tell them before easter. Turns out I was WAY earlier, and you know, she announced my news anyway. This time I'm keeping the news in and secret until I'm ready to tell the world, but only because of my own experience. I have no problem with others telling people right away! It's really exciting and hard not to talk about it.
    DS #1 - 12/10/11
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    DS #2 - 4/2/14

  • I announced early to family and close friends. I don't announce on open social media. Everyone has their own comfort level... also, ability to keep their mouth shut!
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    ceh789
  • I announced to my close family at 2w6d I found out at 9dpo. I will announce to everyone else after I tell my husbands family at a get together next month at 7w. I want to tell in person and they all live out if state other wise I would have announced it publicly the day I got my positive as well. I feel the same about the side eye. I am comfortable with the possible repercussions of telling so early. It bothers me people just can't accept that.
  • jwls84jwls84
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary Name Dropper
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    I told my best friends tonight! I could've hid it, but they are my people, I want them to know.
    I understand why people wait, I did with my first, but I don't think there is a right or a wrong time to announce. It should be based on your comfort level.
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  • My H tells the whole world the second he finds out, so there are no late late announcements in this family. I don't really tell people unless it happens to come up. It just feels weird to me to say, "Hey, guess what! I'm pregnant!"
    Bubba, born Jan. 2007 * Sissy, born Apr. 2009 * Baby Sister, born Feb. 2014
    Jens222
  • I don't think there's anything "wrong" with telling early. I think the reason people don't is that there is such a high risk of things turning south, and if you have to go through that, it's very personal and everyone handles it differently. I blogged about my miscarriage after I was ready to discuss it. I don't think there's any stigma with hiding a miscarriage! BUT, if I had announced my pregnancy early, I would have had to announce my miscarriage as I was going through it, and all I wanted to do was grieve with my husband and that's it. I am super close to my mom and I wouldn't even talk to her. So I think the reason it's smart to wait is just to give you some "cushion" if the worst were to happen.
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  • Almost everyone I know knows already as well, and we are just 8 weeks. It's my first, and I was quite a drinker until we were ttc, so they will know either way!
    megmac15
  • I know why some people don't announce and I totally get and respect that. It is just that many people don't give the same respect to those who announce early.
    i wish i could be joking but my dad is the music teacher at a church so he owuld be mad. we had sex, all the time how bad i know but we dont want to wait and he said GREAT OH KAY! and I was really feeling the wets? down there- too embarsed to say- but he acted like man.
    jjt616MaxsonMommalaurenann89dannie2011
  • We've already told our families. I guess if I were to have a miscarriage, I would really want the support of the people I've already told. That's my comfort level. I haven't told FB, because I wouldn't want to unannounce a pregnancy there. But my mom or sister? I'd be calling them anyway!
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  • I never understood the side-eye either, people go through things differently and announcing early has no bearing on the outcome of your pregnancy. Anyway, I've already told my DD's BMB and we told our friends last night at dinner. We will probably be telling our parents this week :)
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  • I am a private person by nature so announcing early doesn't even occur to me but I don't care if others do it. I really don't like attention, no matter how well-intentioned. Having had a prior loss I felt uncomfortable when co-workers I wasn't close to had to know because I was out for several days after surgery so I knew from my own experience I didn't want to announce early with any subsequent pregnancies. I almost felt bad for the male co-workers who were trying to express concern but didn't know what to say, lol.

    I do understand the concern some people express to FTMs...just more as a, think it through before you do it, are you sure you will be able to handle "un-telling" everyone if you do have a loss? If you think it will be devastating and you don't want people coming up to you months later asking about your pregnancy because they missed the memo that you had a loss, then maybe wait to tell. If you're comfortable with that, then by all means tell whoever you want! Everyone has different comfort levels.

    I don't personally think it's being ashamed about having a loss, it's knowing one's own ability to cope with grief. Some people take it much harder than others. Others are fine being open and honest about everything. 



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  • I don't have any problems with people who announce early. I personally won't do it ever again after I miscarried three days after announcing my first pregnancy. 
    February 19, 2010- BFP! March 14, 2010- M/C January 17, 2011- BFP! April 26th, 2011- It's a boy! Due September 20, 2011 May 2, 2011- Confirmed Gastroschisis August 7, 2011- Labor begins August 12, 2011- Max is born October 4, 2011- Max comes home!

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  • image SamJustice:
    I don't have any problems with people who announce early. I personally won't do it ever again after I miscarried three days after announcing my first pregnancy.nbsp;


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  • iEricaiErica
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    ::sits on the early couch::

    I, too, announce early.  I've told everyone already.  And, I've had a 10 week miscarriage before ::shrugs:: I like to tell the world I'm pregnant :) 


  • image keightlynn:
    I announced to my close family at 2w6d I found out at 9dpo. I will announce to everyone else after I tell my husbands family at a get together next month at 7w. I want to tell in person and they all live out if state other wise I would have announced it publicly the day I got my positive as well. I feel the same about the side eye. I am comfortable with the possible repercussions of telling so early. It bothers me people just can't accept that.

    9dpo is 3w2d.

    AFM, we're telling our parents and best friends this week and going public after our 10w ultrasound since we saw the heartbeats last week.

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  • I think a lot of it had to do with cultures. We told our immediate families but aren't telling anyone else till 12 weeks. I'm Pakistani and my husband is Bosnian and both are non announcing cultures. I have cousins that seemingly came from nowhere because no one told us they were pregnant.
  • I know some people say its bad luck, but for me it's about having to tell those people that we miscarried rather than the risk of miscarriage alone. To me, it makes it that much more painful when everyone knows that we miscarried.
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  • I don't think there's anything "wrong" with telling early. I think the reason people don't is that there is such a high risk of things turning south, and if you have to go through that, it's very personal and everyone handles it differently. I blogged about my miscarriage after I was ready to discuss it. I don't think there's any stigma with hiding a miscarriage! BUT, if I had announced my pregnancy early, I would have had to announce my miscarriage as I was going through it, and all I wanted to do was grieve with my husband and that's it. I am super close to my mom and I wouldn't even talk to her. So I think the reason it's smart to wait is just to give you some "cushion" if the worst were to happen.
    This. I had such a hard time processing my mc myself and didn't feel like talking to anyone about it for quite some time, and I am typically a very open person. I wasn't able to tell some people for months.
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  • That's nice that you feel comfortable about announcing it early- the only reason I have yet to announce it to my family is because I get the whole "you should and shouldnt do this and that and blah blah blah, I don't like it when people tell me what to do with my body! Otherwise I would have announced it a long time ago! Good for you!
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  • ClaireBear90ClaireBear90
    250 Answers Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments 100 Love Its
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    edited August 2013
    No, of course it isn't irresponsible to announce "early"! But, as others have said, I think most women who choose to wait do so not because they're Debbie Downers but because they've experienced m/c before or because they think they would handle one better if they didn't have to tell everyone about it.

    I'm waiting until 13 weeks, primarily because my first appointment isn't until this coming Thursday and there's no way I want to tell everyone before I've even seen the midwife. A lot of people have probably already guessed because of my belly (call it whatever you want, but I do LOOK pregnant, haha) but I won't announce until I feel comfortable doing so. :)

    ETA: And no one is "setting themselves up" for something bad to happen or jinxing themselves or asking for trouble by announcing early. Each woman just has to weigh her personal feelings on the matter.
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  • I told my family and close friends within a week of finding out but I'm avoiding announcing to the world because I won't have my first appointment with the midwife until 12 weeks and if anything happens I don't want to share with the world before I'm ready after having watched a good friend have to do that three times already. My husband is bursting at the seams though and told a close friend of his who has a big mouth- so half the town probably knows already.
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  • image keightlynn:
    I announced to my close family at 2w6d I found out at 9dpo. I will announce to everyone else after I tell my husbands family at a get together next month at 7w. I want to tell in person and they all live out if state other wise I would have announced it publicly the day I got my positive as well. I feel the same about the side eye. I am comfortable with the possible repercussions of telling so early. It bothers me people just can't accept that.

    9dpo is 3w2d.

    AFM, we're telling our parents and best friends this week and going public after our 10w ultrasound since we saw the heartbeats last week.
    Assuming the average cycle of 28 days.
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  • While I don't judge early or late announces I feel as though I'm missing context for this thread.

     
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  • We were early announcers too. I had my first 8 yrs ago and the fam assumed we were done. (As did we)
    When we found out, we couldn't hold it in!! I also enjoy my vino too so people would know something's up.
    My DH told everyone, and I was fine with it; seeing him so happy and proud warmed my heart :x
  • I told close friends and family early. I think about it like this, who would I want to tell IF something happened. My sister announced early and lost her baby at 10.5 weeks. She regretted that some people knew because to keep telling those more random people what happened became very difficult. Everyone should announce when they are ready. It's wonderful news!
  • I assumed I wasn't as far along as the little calculator suggested. I went for my first ultrasound Thursday and I was 7w1d and not 8w1d. Although we heard the heart beat, when I got back to school that day a coworker asked if I told everyone. My team and a few other people know. I would hate for 100+ people at my scho
  • School to find out right now and get bombarded with questions everytime I left my classroom. Sorry my stupid phone posted early. But I was so annoyed that someone else was deciding when I should tell people. It's a personal choice and those negative looks and stares should shove it. Happy weekend!
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