February 2013 Moms

Feeling underappreciated *whine*

Hi ladies,

 Instead of yelling at DH, can I whine here?  I'm feeling rather underappreciated these days.  It stems from Mother's Day, when DH gave me nothing.  Zip, zero, zilch.  We went out for brunch with my mom, but I wound up paying for our portion.  That's right, my first Mother's day cost ME $60.00.  It's not the money that's bugging me, though, it's the fact that DH has never once told me that I'm doing a good job or that I'm a good mother or anything.  Fast forward to my birthday at the end of June.  I asked for a pair of amethyst earrings, since that's DS's birthstone.  I ldidn't find any at the mall but DH found some online.  I told him I liked them and to go ahead and order them.  He hasn't ordered them yet, as far as I know.  I know it's childish of me but I'm bummed that I haven't gotten a birthday present yet and I never did get a Mother's Day present or even a card.

 

Today he's meeting s friend for lunch.  This guy has become a friend of mine, too, and is DS's godfather.  I asked if DS and I could come too and he said no, he was leaving and we wouldn't be ready in time.  

 

Thanks for letting me vent, I'm just feeling blue and underappreciated.

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Re: Feeling underappreciated *whine*

  • I would express all that to him, if I were you.  Resentment can lead to some pretty unhappy results for both of you.  You deserve to feel appreciated and valued.  If it's not in traditional ways (like gifts or cards), that's okay, but working out a system where he regularly expresses his love and appreciation for you (and vice versa) is so important.  GL girl!

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  • That's not very nice. I'm not going to lie, the lunch thing would straight piss me off. I don't think I could hold it in. 
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    Our Sweet Boy "LJ"
  • Aw, I'm sorry. :( It sucks to feel unappreciated. 

    I would talk to him about it though. Like PP said, resentment will build and then it'll just get worse.

     

  • I'm sorry. I kind of understand how you feel. DH isn't so great at showing his appreciation sometimes either. I think it's just not as big of a deal to men. I would definitely bring it up, I know that with me, the longer I just internally stewed about it, the worse the resentment would get.
    PCOS with long, irregular cycles
    First round of Clomid in May 2012= BFP #1, DD born January 2013 
    BFP #2 in January 2014, DS born September 2014

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  • If it is any consolation my husband got me jack sh*t for mothers day and when I got him a really cute picture with LO's hand and foot prints he was like "what did I get you again?" I said "nothing, we had dinner with your mom."  He also never tells me that I'm doing a good job or am a good mom but I know he thinks it.  Sounds like we might have the same type of hubby which is the type of guy who means well but can be inconsiderate at times.  a day off for mom might do the trick, he can be with the baby all day!
  • image carriesu2003:
    If it is any consolation my husband got me jack sh*t for mothers day and when I got him a really cute picture with LO's hand and foot prints he was like "what did I get you again?" I said "nothing, we had dinner with your mom."  He also never tells me that I'm doing a good job or am a good mom but I know he thinks it.  Sounds like we might have the same type of hubby which is the type of guy who means well but can be inconsiderate at times.  a day off for mom might do the trick, he can be with the baby all day!

    same here.  DH forgot Mother's Day and then we got in a big fight about it and he stormed out and went to the office for 3 hours. I asked him the other day if he thought I was a good mom and he responded with'well...' and then listed all the things I do wrong.  This coming from the man who is currently on hour 2 of being at the gym leaving me literally all day with a baby who has about 3 screaming hour long or longer meltdowns a day. They're @sses.

  • image marionravenwood:

    image carriesu2003:
    If it is any consolation my husband got me jack sh*t for mothers day and when I got him a really cute picture with LO's hand and foot prints he was like "what did I get you again?" I said "nothing, we had dinner with your mom."  He also never tells me that I'm doing a good job or am a good mom but I know he thinks it.  Sounds like we might have the same type of hubby which is the type of guy who means well but can be inconsiderate at times.  a day off for mom might do the trick, he can be with the baby all day!

    same here.  DH forgot Mother's Day and then we got in a big fight about it and he stormed out and went to the office for 3 hours. I asked him the other day if he thought I was a good mom and he responded with'well...' and then listed all the things I do wrong.  This coming from the man who is currently on hour 2 of being at the gym leaving me literally all day with a baby who has about 3 screaming hour long or longer meltdowns a day. They're @sses.


    Your H sounds like he needs a swift kick in the behind. I can pretty much guarantee that you're doing a great job as a mom; he's the one who obviously needs to step up his game.
    PCOS with long, irregular cycles
    First round of Clomid in May 2012= BFP #1, DD born January 2013 
    BFP #2 in January 2014, DS born September 2014

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  • emd886emd886
    100 Comments First Anniversary 5 Love Its
    member

    I would definitely talk to him about this. Let him know that you feel underappreciated and it's making you feel sad and unloved. Let him know that you need him to show appreciation for all you're doing. Men are natural problem solvers. When they here about our problems (whether its related to them or not) they tend to offer a solution (instead of just letting us vent lol) because they want to just fix it.

    I hope that works for you! You're much more calm than me, my hubby wouldve heard about this looooong ago

    BabyFruit Ticker
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