Parenting after a Loss

I am just so frustrated!

Mobile: I am just so frustrated!

There's nothing like being charged by your child's pediatrician to get them to drink 2 - 3 oz. of juice a day, by any means necessary, and having NO MEANS by which to do so. The pediatrician even told me to do it by a medicine dropper a bit at a time if I had to, but DD won't swallow. She just lets it roll out of her mouth. Which is what she does with a sippy, with a different kind of sippy, with me holding a cup up to her mouth and letting her sip/slurp it. I have to give her nearly two tablespoons of laxative to get her to go every day - or even every other day - and I am so frustrated. I feel like there has got to be a better way, but we've seriously tried everything. I know I keep raving about this it just makes me so upset. Her body can't be designed not to go. Why is this happening? The only thing I can think is that she did, as someone mentioned previously, develop a fear of going, so she holds it unless she can't (like when I give her a laxative).

Thank you for letting me mostly vent and I'm sorry for doing so. 

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Re: I am just so frustrated!

  • Have you tried blowing in her face to get her to swallow? I absolutely hate doing it but it was the only way we could get S to swallow meds for a long time. We perfected the squirt a small amount then blow technique.
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  • image Missa_g:
    Have you tried blowing in her face to get her to swallow? I absolutely hate doing it but it was the only way we could get S to swallow meds for a long time. We perfected the squirt a small amount then blow technique.

    I will try this, if it comes to it. Giving her half a teaspoon by medicine dropper is trial enough, let alone several ounces. I am too wound up to even think clearly about this right now. 

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  • I haven't done research on this, but I wonder if there might be dietary changes that could help?  I'm not sure what your DD eats, but maybe something more like a paleo diet, or gluten free, or avoiding dairy, etc could help?
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  • I know this might be TMI but has the doctor inspected the area? I know someone's baby who needed to get a small flap of skin removed that was covering the hole partly.
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  • My DD has to drink juice for constipation and I dilute it with water and she takes it out of a bottle. I know she is much younger than yours, but maybe a bottle of diluted juice? I do 2 oz apple or white grape and 3 oz water. 
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  • image theresat858:
    I haven't done research on this, but I wonder if there might be dietary changes that could help?  I'm not sure what your DD eats, but maybe something more like a paleo diet, or gluten free, or avoiding dairy, etc could help?

    Right now the only things she's eating are pears, peaches, prunes, Cheerios, and beans. I'm afraid to give her anything else. When I didn't give her a laxative on this diet, she didn't go for three days :/ Which doesn't seem like a lot, I guess, but I'm worried to let her go without going long at all lest I compound the problem. 

    image pangnl79:I know this might be TMI but has the doctor inspected the area? I know someone's baby who needed to get a small flap of skin removed that was covering the hole partly.

    I'm seriously considering taking her to a GI specialist. The pediatrician told me to call back in two weeks if I didn't see any progress, and of course I have, but it's only because she's taking copious amounts of a laxative every day. Anybody can pass liquid poo!

    image NBBride05:My DD has to drink juice for constipation and I dilute it with water and she takes it out of a bottle. I know she is much younger than yours, but maybe a bottle of diluted juice? I do 2 oz apple or white grape and 3 oz water. 

    She started refusing a bottle around 7 months :/ She'll take a sippy of milk when I'm not here, but otherwise, she nurses. But thank you for sharing your experience and the suggestion!

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  • Have you tried these?

    http://www.amazon.com/dp/B006WHR6CU/ref=asc_df_B006WHR6CU2610494?smid=ATVPDKIKX0DER&tag=msnshopping-20&linkCode=asn&creative=395093&creativeASIN=B006WHR6CU

     

    They were the only ones I could get DS to take for the longest time.  Also, you might want to try different types of juice.  DS only takes certain apple juices and white grape.  He still will not drink OJ.

     

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  • im so sorry youre going through that... i havent read the comments so i dont know if this was mentioned... but whatabout freezing it and letting her suck on the ice?
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  • Cheerios have iron added to them, which I know can be constipating... maybe eliminate them for a few days and see?
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  • I don't remember how old your DD is, but you mention she's still nursing. Have you looked at your diet? Also, maybe kellymom has something useful?
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  • image Shaungela:
    im so sorry youre going through that... i havent read the comments so i dont know if this was mentioned... but whatabout freezing it and letting her suck on the ice?

    That's not a bad idea! Thanks!

    image theresat858:
    Cheerios have iron added to them, which I know can be constipating... maybe eliminate them for a few days and see?

    I had thought about that, too. At her 9 month appt., though, her iron was borderline, so I have to get it into her somehow, and rice is definitely out.

    image watermelon mom:I don't remember how old your DD is, but you mention she's still nursing. Have you looked at your diet? Also, maybe kellymom has something useful?

    She's 11 months. We weren't experiencing any problems when she was exclusively nursing, but I haven't ruled it out.  

     

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  • Will she eat broccoli for iron? I'm so sorry your going through this. I don't have any suggestion on foods since I haven't ran into issues and you've been nursing for 11 months I don't think it's your diet unless you changed it? Will she drink water? I know being hydrated helps too? Not saying she's not getting water from the milk.

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  • I'm so sorry you are experiencing this. Have you considered removing solids altogether from her diet for a while to see what happens? They say "food before one is just for fun"--she is still getting everything she needs from BFing. Maybe getting her back to basics would help get her regular again, then you could try (very gradually) reintroducing solids to see how she tolerates them. 

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  • I'm sorry, I'm sure I've read your previous posts, but I'm just forgetting.. is DD showing signs of discomfort when she's going, or rather when she isn't going for a day or two?  I only ask because DS went through something similar around 6 months.. he was going a few days between poops and when I spoke with my Ped she didn't seem concerned at all as long as he wasn't showing signs of discomfort.. she said though it's more common in EBF babies to go every few days as they get older, sometimes we see this in formula fed babies, too.. just like some adults may not go every day (I know I'm guilty of that one!! I've been a 1x/week-10 days for YEARS!.. it's just how my body works.. )... I'm assuming you've tried rectal stimulation, too?  We did this when DS was much younger.. 2 months or less.. it worked, but then what happened is we could only get him to go when we'd do it.. it was a slippery slope..

    I'm sorry you guys are having such awful poo issues :(  Poor DD.. have you tried maybe watering the juice down a ton?  Or, perhaps can you add a little in with your BM and bottle feed it to her?  Either way, then she'd have to drink even more to get those 2-3oz of juice in, and I"m not sure BM and juice mixed would taste g at all!  :(  What about maybe freezing the juice and then spoon feeding it to her like a slushy or icee? 

    Best of luck!!! Big hugs!!  And, vent away :)

     

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  • image tetiananina:
    Will she eat broccoli for iron? I'm so sorry your going through this. I don't have any suggestion on foods since I haven't ran into issues and you've been nursing for 11 months I don't think it's your diet unless you changed it? Will she drink water? I know being hydrated helps too? Not saying she's not getting water from the milk.

    She does enjoy broccoli. Maybe I'll give that a try instead of the Cheerios (though she'll be so sad, she loves them!)

    She'll take water now and then... honestly I feel like it's a cup issue, with the juice. She just doesn't "need" it so she won't take it.

    image erinlovesdavid:

    I'm so sorry you are experiencing this. Have you considered removing solids altogether from her diet for a while to see what happens? They say "food before one is just for fun"--she is still getting everything she needs from BFing. Maybe getting her back to basics would help get her regular again, then you could try (very gradually) reintroducing solids to see how she tolerates them. 

    I have really thought about doing this, too, though I've noticed on days where I haven't been as vigilant about feeding her solids she's much hungrier at night, with more wake ups :/ And I don't know that I've got the supply for her anymore, since she's been eating two meals a day for a couple of months now.

    image JulyMomma2U2:

    I'm sorry, I'm sure I've read your previous posts, but I'm just forgetting.. is DD showing signs of discomfort when she's going, or rather when she isn't going for a day or two?  I only ask because DS went through something similar around 6 months.. he was going a few days between poops and when I spoke with my Ped she didn't seem concerned at all as long as he wasn't showing signs of discomfort.. she said though it's more common in EBF babies to go every few days as they get older, sometimes we see this in formula fed babies, too.. just like some adults may not go every day (I know I'm guilty of that one!! I've been a 1x/week-10 days for YEARS!.. it's just how my body works.. )... I'm assuming you've tried rectal stimulation, too?  We did this when DS was much younger.. 2 months or less.. it worked, but then what happened is we could only get him to go when we'd do it.. it was a slippery slope..

    I'm sorry you guys are having such awful poo issues :(  Poor DD.. have you tried maybe watering the juice down a ton?  Or, perhaps can you add a little in with your BM and bottle feed it to her?  Either way, then she'd have to drink even more to get those 2-3oz of juice in, and I"m not sure BM and juice mixed would taste g at all!  :(  What about maybe freezing the juice and then spoon feeding it to her like a slushy or icee? 

    Best of luck!!! Big hugs!!  And, vent away :)

     

    She is in serious discomfort when she doesn't go. It's heartbreaking. She pulls her hair and strains and cries :(

    DH is actually a once a week kind of guy, so I think she's just inherited his bowels. I'm okay with her not going as often, I think she may just have some fear now because it hurts when she only goes once a week.

    I am definitely going to try freezing the juice. I'm back to giving her the laxative every day because I'm worried about letting her go too long, but I will probably try to start weaning her off of it and introduce some of the things everyone has suggested. 

     

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  • image RusalkaSings:

    She is in serious discomfort when she doesn't go. It's heartbreaking. She pulls her hair and strains and cries :(

    DH is actually a once a week kind of guy, so I think she's just inherited his bowels. I'm okay with her not going as often, I think she may just have some fear now because it hurts when she only goes once a week.

    I am definitely going to try freezing the juice. I'm back to giving her the laxative every day because I'm worried about letting her go too long, but I will probably try to start weaning her off of it and introduce some of the things everyone has suggested. 

     

    Aw, I'm sorry!  When DS was an infant he struggled with this.. he'd cry, cry, cry and his poor belly would be blown up like a balloon.. :(  Once he'd go, he'd feel better.. but within a day or 2 we'd be back to square one..

    I hope freezing the juice helps! And, I think you're right.. I'd keep doing the laxative, too, until I found something else that worked..

    Have you introduced any WCM yet?  FWIW, we started it when DS was around 11 1/2 months old.. just 2oz in a sippy cup.. he wouldn't drink very much (because it was in a sippy), but even the little bit he took DEF made him go.. granted, DS has a milk sensitivity I'm thinking.. but from what I've read, and people I've talked with, it seems lots of toddlers seem to go more when introducing wcm?  I know you EBF, so not sure if you're planning to intro milk, but just a thought?  Poor little E.. I hope she's able to get this all worked out soon!  (((hugs Momma)))

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  • Would you consider offering a pacifier while administering the medicine?  I use it as a tool to get DS and DD to take medicine, I sneak the medicine in their mouth and then pop in the paci, they swallow the medicine everytime without any dribbles. 

     

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  • Couple of things:

    If you HAVE to give her the juice, put it in a syringe, hold her cheeks and then squirt a little bit of the juice in her mouth aiming for her cheek. Then switch sides. You can try blowing on her face (the startle reflex will sometimes make her gulp) too. The key is to do little bits at a time.

    However.... 

    I think that the time has come to ask for a consult to see a pediatric GI specialist (if you can). She's been on Miralaxx, correct? Are they also having you do rectal temps twice per day also to stimulate the rectum?  I know it's frustrating, but it's also super common--and if you talk to the right medical professional they will tell you that and also should be able to help you come up with a plan that makes you more comfortable.

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