Adoption

What to buy prior to placement?

We are still in the early stages of the waiting pool (not matched but surprise instant babies are possible) and I was wondering what I absolutely needed right away after bringing baby home.  I do not want to do a full on decorated nursery because things can fall through at the last minute. (The nursery is painted a neutral color. We did that before we moved into our home.) Carseat is already purchased.

What will we need right away?  We will have family visiting after the placement so we can always do big purchases with their help.  

 (I am definitely okay with secondhand stuff.) 

Pursing Domestic Infant Adoption through a local agency. In the meantime, our dog is our baby.  Bumping from Portland, Oregon. 

Re: What to buy prior to placement?

  • I would say a crib or PNP (somewhere for baby to sleep), bottles for feeding, and a few onesies/pants/sleepers.  Newborns don't need much right away, so you should be able to get by with just those things if you need to. :)
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  • We used swaddle blankets for the first few weeks and brought one with us to the hospital when our daughter was born.  Don't worry about buying too many clothes.  When they're little they can wear the same outfit for days at a time.  Use the binkie the hospital gives you (if you're okay with giving your child binkies).  Buy a bassinet you can put next to the bed or an in-bed co-sleeper.  We bought the Summer Infant co-sleeper but we only have a queen size bed so that left us VERY little room for ourselves once we placed that thing between us.  But our daughter didn't like the inclined rock-n-play sleeper so we dealt with the co-sleeper until she was about a month, then we started putting her in her crib. 
    Christa (32) and Brandon (30)
    Dx: PCOS and Low Sperm Count
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    Adopted a baby girl in January 2013!!

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  • IRRIRR
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    Having been through buying stuff and bringing it to the hospital and then having to return it since the EM changed her mind 20 minutes before we were suppose to leave the hospital, my advise is buy NOTHING.  I would certainly look at strollers, cribs, bassinets etc.  whenever you feel like it and you have time, but make an online list.  If it is available on Amazon, make a wishlist. See if it is also available at Walmart/Target/Babies R Us and chances are one of those stores will be located within 20 minutes of the hospital. Check the wishlist every month or so to see if the items you want are still available (seems like every 4-6 months things change).  When the time comes, you can pick up your wishlist when you go to pick up your child.  JMO.
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    Failed Matches - December 2012, May 2013, December 2013


  • I actually agree with buying very little.  We had to fly to meet our son and we had to lug the car seat with us.  It would have been much easier to buy what we needed there.  I'd get a few unisex sleepers in newborn and then make a list of exactly what you will buy (which car seat, etc).  We ran around Walmart when we got to our destination and got everything else we needed.

    if you want specific furniture you may want to order.  Ours took 16 weeks to come in. 

    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • Pre-match we bought nothing. We're in a match now and we pretty much have anything we'd need- carseat, crib, some clothes, bottles.  We wanted a nice crib and since those take forever to come in, we ordered one---it took 10 weeks.
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • I'll be the odd woman out and say it doesn't hurt to have stuff ahead of time to make your life easier. Gals on this board actually encouraged it, because some had been unprepared. We had a smattering of clothes and cloth diapers, and we bought a crib, PnP, stroller, and car seat beforehand. We ended up with an emergency placement and DH had to run out and shop our first night home.

    i recommend a book like Baby Bargains and keeping an eye open for sales, etc. We bought the stroller because Amazon had it on sale.

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  • A car seat, formula, bottles, diapers, wipes, a pack of onesies, and a bed with bedding. Keep it simple, that's all they need. Add more stuff as needed.

    Mother of  Sable Rene' & Clifton Michael
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  • What babies absolutely need right away is minimal -- a place to sleep safely, formula/bottles, diapers, a couple outfits, and a car seat. All of which you can get last minute fairly easily. Pre-match, we didn't buy anything. Now that we are matched and the due date is close, we bought a car seat (I wanted to wait, but DH convinced me) and borrowed some other things (a few outfits, PNP, a wrap) from friends/family. Everything else is on our Amazon wish list. We have done nothing towards creating a nursery. I second the recommendation for the Baby Bargains book. It helped with deciding which products to put on our wish list.

    We made the decision of what to buy now vs. later by realizing that, for us, the relative inconvenience of doing some things last minute was far outweighed by how devastating it would be to have to return all those purchases/return home empty-handed to a fully decorated nursery, etc. Other folks have done it and handled it fine I'm sure, but it wasn't for me.

  • We did not buy anything prior to being matched but my local adoptive mom friends made fun of me for that. They all purchased unisex stuff right after hs approval.

    I did make a registry as soon as we were hs approved. I bought the baby bargains book and did lots of research. I definitely knew the car seat I wanted to purchase and I had fun picking out boy and girl stuff. I also went to stores and tested strollers, etc. It is a great way to pass the time and I knew what I wanted if we did have a quick placement.

    I would say that if you are going to buy anything, a car seat and a pack n play would be a good place to start.

    Good luck! 

    DX AMA + MFI



    After almost 5 years, 7 fresh IVF cycles and a few losses along the way, we are excited to move on to domestic infant adoption!




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  • We were fortunate enough to have two big showers right after we were approved and now we pretty much have everything. I didn't want to do it post-match and didn't want to rush post-placement. So I plan to put a very labor-intensive DIY nursery together while we wait. Smile
    My feet and Miss Heidi the rescue mutt!

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    15 treatment cycles: four early m/c
    Moving forward with domestic infant adoption!

    Home study approved 5/13, now just waiting...

  • I'm the odd one out... After talking with other adoptive moms, our SW etc. we decided that we wanted to purchase/receive things pre match. We want to be able to have our nursery furniture etc for multiple children, we want unisex clothes, car seats, stroller etc so that I don't have to purchase another set when we have another child. 

    We don't want our items attached to a match either in case it doesn't pan out so we will get everything in the next couple of months!

     

    Began the Adoption process 4/2013
    Home study Approved 12/2013
    .... and the wait begins! 

  • A carseat, bassinet or pack n play a few onsies, bottles, light weight blanket or two and diapers (not too many, we stocked up on newborn diapers and DD was almost too big for them at birth we ended up having to give them away and going to size 1).

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  • image aligross:

    I'm the odd one out... After talking with other adoptive moms, our SW etc. we decided that we wanted to purchase/receive things pre match. We want to be able to have our nursery furniture etc for multiple children, we want unisex clothes, car seats, stroller etc so that I don't have to purchase another set when we have another child. 

    We don't want our items attached to a match either in case it doesn't pan out so we will get everything in the next couple of months!

     

     

    Same here!!!  We bought lots of stuff prior to a match and have no regrets.  We were able to scour the sales and buy a lot of stuff for cheap and nothing was emotionally attached to a certain child in the event we experienced a failed match (we didn't).

    Christa (32) and Brandon (30)
    Dx: PCOS and Low Sperm Count
    Married Oct 2007
    TTC since Jan 2007
    2 IUI's, 2 IVF's, 3 FET's, resulting in one miscarriage at 7 weeks and one chemical
    Adopted a baby girl in January 2013!!

    My blog: Fearlessly Infertile
    My Articles
  • image cvpis4me:
    image aligross:

    I'm the odd one out... After talking with other adoptive moms, our SW etc. we decided that we wanted to purchase/receive things pre match. We want to be able to have our nursery furniture etc for multiple children, we want unisex clothes, car seats, stroller etc so that I don't have to purchase another set when we have another child. 

    We don't want our items attached to a match either in case it doesn't pan out so we will get everything in the next couple of months!

     

     

    Same here!!!  We bought lots of stuff prior to a match and have no regrets.  We were able to scour the sales and buy a lot of stuff for cheap and nothing was emotionally attached to a certain child in the event we experienced a failed match (we didn't).

    Us too.  It all fits in one room, so we can leave the door closed if we are disappointed or impatient.  That's my theory, anyway.    

    My feet and Miss Heidi the rescue mutt!

    image

    15 treatment cycles: four early m/c
    Moving forward with domestic infant adoption!

    Home study approved 5/13, now just waiting...

  • I would advise not buying any formula pre birth.  You will probably use what they leave the hospital on and you won't know what that is.  You can run out and buy the formula before the baby is discharged.  Plus formula expires.

    i should have added to my prior post that if you know you won't be flying for sure then i would consider buying a bit more ahead (you can watch amazon or BRU for car seat sales). 

    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • We already have a carseat since it is required by the agency before entering the waiting pool.
    Pursing Domestic Infant Adoption through a local agency. In the meantime, our dog is our baby.  Bumping from Portland, Oregon. 
  • image aligross:

    We want to be able to have our nursery furniture etc for multiple children, we want unisex clothes, car seats, stroller etc so that I don't have to purchase another set when we have another child. 

    We don't want our items attached to a match either in case it doesn't pan out so we will get everything in the next couple of months!

    This was us. We had started a neutral nursery when we went active. We purchased a crib (I wanted the child sleeping there from day 1, personal preference), pnp, bottles, car seat, onesies (I disagree with the pp who said a new baby can wear the same clothes for days, DD spit up a lot, so we changed her a lot), blankets, bedding, diapers, a few rattle toys, glider, etc.

    We wanted to be prepared. We adopted from in state, so we didn't have to worry about traveling far and lugging stuff around. 

     As you can tell by the variety of responses, it's a personal preference.  You can't go wrong in whatever you choose to do.

    I became a mother because of adoption. She is the absolute love of my life. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker formerly known as sw_in_kc
  • We bought nursery furniture (crib, changing table, dresser), carseat, Snap N Go, PnP, some clothes, diaper bag stocked with essentials, few bottles.....our match brought us 20 hours from home and we stayed out of state for over a month so we bought a lot then....and then had two shower parties when we returned home.
  • I'm also one to err on the side of doing things in advance (but not too far in advance) so that you're prepared.  I've been buying stuff that I know I could use for our future kiddos anyway, but I'm finally at the point where I feel free to work on stuff for our child's room. 
    I'm a dance studio owner, writer, cat mommy, and adventuress who is married to the man of her dreams. My husband and I have had a long-time dream to adopt and it's happening in a way that we didn't quite anticipate. But, like any move of God, it's turning out way better than we expected. We'd love for you to follow our story at www.kirstenkline.com!
  • Keep in mind carseats expire.  If you buy one (or more) now and it takes a while to get a match you could lose out on months or even years of use and have to buy another one.  It doesn't matter if you didn't use it, if it's expired you cannot use it anymore.  In fact depending on your state it could be illegal to use it.

  • image mysticl:
    Keep in mind carseats expire. nbsp;If you buy one or more now and it takes a while to get a match you could lose out on months or even years of use and have to buy another one. nbsp;It doesn't matter if you didn't use it, if it's expired you cannot use it anymore. nbsp;In fact depending on your state it could be illegal to use it.


    Thank you for your thoughts. As I mentioned in my previous post, we were required to buy a carseat prior to entering the waiting pool. It is still in the box I am sure it will be fine to use. I have never heard of an expiring car seat. I do not plan on waiting more than 2 years for a match. To my knowledge our agency and hospitals do not check to see what kind of carseat we have, just as long as we have one. Anybody else had a problem like this before?
    Pursing Domestic Infant Adoption through a local agency. In the meantime, our dog is our baby.  Bumping from Portland, Oregon. 
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