So this is the 2nd day I've been home from work. Last week I missed a day. The closer I get to the due date, the harder it is for me to be strong. I am covered by FMLA right now, so I"m not worried about that part. I am worried about how long this lasts. I went back back to work 4 weeks after Astrid was born on 4/15/13. It wasn't until a bad day in June that I missed any work. Then a month later on July 11th. Now these two days this week. Her EDD is next Friday. I did plan ahead and I have taken a full week of PTO to get through next week. But what about after that? It seems unrealistic that I will magically feel better once I get past July 26th? I just hate that I felt like I was okay-ish until last week.
Hubby was super unsupportive today too...and that has me doubly upset. I called him on the way home and said I couldn't do it today and he said, "You just have to be strong and deal with it" and I lashed out, "Why do I always have to be strong? I just want to be told I don't have to be strong all the time!" I then told him about the woman who came to my cube today to talk about her cell phone service that was rubbing her hands up and down her huge pregnant belly while talking to me and how that was a trigger for me today. He goes (sarcastically), "Yeah no one else should ever allowed to be pregnant." What the f**k? That is NOT what I'm saying. Then he follows it up with, "It's what PG women do--you just have to deal with it" So now i'm upset not only because I miss Astrid, but also because my husband is an @ss
I'm upset, sad, angry, heartbroken. I don't know how to keep doing this right now.
BFP # 1 11/2011, MC 12/2011
BFP #2 11/2012, Delivered at 21 weeks on 3/16/13 due to complications with bilateral renal agenesis.
~~Missing Astrid Lynne~~
BFP#3: 09/2013, EDD 5/14/14