July 2012 Moms

Frustrating one year visit

We had Robin's one year pedi visit today, and I left feeling really frustrated. Some things that happened:

1) I asked my pedi how I should go about introducing WCM and he said, "Put it in a sippy cup and give it to him." No sh!t, right? Like I couldn't figure that one out on my own.

2) He told me I should stop breastfeeding because Robin has teeth.

3) He told me I shouldn't be giving him water, only milk, because there was no way I was producing enough BM for him anymore. (He still nurses 3x a day, so I'm guessing he's getting at least 12oz of milk still.) 

4) He gave me totally outdated information about how much milk Robin should be getting. He told me 24-32oz of milk per day. I looked it up and AAP recommends 16-20oz of dairy a day.

He also told me I should keep feeding him baby oatmeal until he's at least 18 months old. This is one I've been smiling and nodding at since his 6 month visit, because we haven't given R baby cereal since the first few weeks he started solids, but it's still annoying to hear.

On the plus side, my little boy who at 3 months had completely fallen off the growth charts and was below the 1st percentile for weight is now in the 55th percentile for his weight at a hefty 22lbs 13oz.


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Re: Frustrating one year visit

  • elizdgelizdg
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    Ugh, I'm sure that was annoying to hear. But yay for his growth! That is really good news! I'm hoping to hear something similar about Graham's growth when we go tomorrow.
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  • It sounds like you're doing a wonderful job. If you've had a difference of opinion/philosophy with your pedi for this long why not find a new one? Robin sounds perfectly healthy. :) That's what counts.   

    ETA: From your post it sounds like he's an older doctor "phoning it in". He's not current with the AAP, he's not familiar or respectful of your parenting choices. That's what is concerning.


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  • I would be finding a new pedi. Sounds like you know more than your doc.

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  • Find a new pedi. I still have an over supply at 12.5 months! We nurse 3X and MOTN. At 11.5 months while on vacation I could still pump 20 ounces a day, what would he say to that? I am annoyed for you.
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  • Sounds like it's time for a new ped! Glad to hear he's growing and healthy, and keep up the good work bf'ing mama!
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  • @Elizdg--Good luck with your visit tomorrow!

    @Leilei--Thanks! He's really doing wonderfully, which I'm so happy about after a rocky start.

    As far as finding a new pedi (since a bunch of you mentioned it), it's something that I've thought about but DH isn't really on board. The thing is, our current pedi has a really great bedside manner with Robin--always makes him laugh/smile during check ups--and we've had all good experiences when it comes to the few sick visits we've had. And it does seem like it would be a huge pain, which I wonder if it's worth it when we're hopefully going be seldom be there. But then part of me wishes we did have a pedi I didn't have to do the "smile and nod" at so much. Tongue Tied 


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  • zyaszyas
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    image DHeckart:
    I would be finding a new pedi. Sounds like you know more than your doc.


    I was thinking this exact same thing.
  • That does sound very frustrating. I understand not wanting the hassle of finding a new pedi and liking his bedside manner, but I would rather have someone that I trust and it doesn't sound like you can/do trust him. But to each their own. :) Great news on his growth!
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  • I am with Emilypc, if you are so unhappy with him medical wise and obviously can't listen to anything he says, then why keep him around? bc he makes your kid laugh? Your pedi is not there to be a clown, he is there to help you, make sure you are doing the best for your child and to educate you on how to take care of you child/keep them well. If my pedi was giving me outdated advice and not on board with nursing "bc he has teeth", I would be finding a new one immediately.

    Also with the rice cereal, he isn't too far off base, it is recommended unless the child is getting enough iron from other sources.
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  • Sorry but thats sounds like a real dumb reason not to switch to a new pedi. Most pedi are going to be good with kids and most of them set aside time slots daily to get sick kids in. I would ask around or do some research, I bet you can find a pedi that has just as good if not better bedside manner but is up to date with their practicing.

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  • Sorry the appointment didnt go well! Sounds like he is a very healthy little guy and your doing a great job! Trust your momma instinct on this one ::insert mobile smiley::

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  • I agree with PPs, it sounds like he is an older pedi who has not kept up with the current AAP recommendations.  I understand that finding a new pedi is a huge PITA.  However, it may be more important to have your pedi give you current updated information.  Most pedi's like kids so I am sure you could find another one with great bedside manner. I am glad Robin is growing and doing well.
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  • image kimmer1412:
    Sorry but thats sounds like a real dumb reason not to switch to a new pedi. Most pedi are going to be good with kids and most of them set aside time slots daily to get sick kids in. I would ask around or do some research, I bet you can find a pedi that has just as good if not better bedside manner but is up to date with their practicing.

    1.  Your are doing an AWESOME job with that boy!  Just look at that growth, following your instincts despite the ridiculous advice of your pedi.  Way to go!

    2.  Seriously, what kimmer said.   

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  • image DHeckart:
    I would be finding a new pedi. Sounds like you know more than your doc.


    This. I kind of feel that any pedi that tells you to quit breastfeeding isn't worth your time or money.
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  • Woohoo for Robin's growth!!! Great job, mama.

    I'd be looking into a new pedi if I was in your situation. Aside from a good bedside manner with children, what is your current pedi offering you? Outdated information and frustration - not worth it to me. Do you have any mom friends or local resources you could get pedi recommendations from? That has worked well for me in the past. Don't let a little bit of discomfort over finding a new pedi prevent you from going with you gut on this one! Good luck!

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  • image BransonsBecca:
    image DHeckart:
    I would be finding a new pedi. Sounds like you know more than your doc.


    This. I kind of feel that any pedi that tells you to quit breastfeeding isn't worth your time or money.


    Yup. I would be pissed if any healthcare professional told me not to BF. they should know better!
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  • image chipmunk112511:
    I am with Emilypc, if you are so unhappy with him medical wise and obviously can't listen to anything he says, then why keep him around? bc he makes your kid laugh? Your pedi is not there to be a clown, he is there to help you, make sure you are doing the best for your child and to educate you on how to take care of you child/keep them well. If my pedi was giving me outdated advice and not on board with nursing "bc he has teeth", I would be finding a new one immediately.

    Also with the rice cereal, he isn't too far off base, it is recommended unless the child is getting enough iron from other sources.


    You, along with everyone else who replied, are right. It's a PITA to find a new one but it's time. MH isn't quite in board with the idea since I do my research and know when to follow his advice and when not to, but you all are right, I shouldn't have to research my doc's advice to see if it's valid. I looked up the other pedis in the same practice and rescheduled our 15 month visit with a different doctor who is a current AAP fellow, which our current doc is not. If we don't have a better experience with him then I guess it's time to look for a new practice.

    And I know it's true about the rice cereal thing. I just feel like instead of blindly telling me to feed it to him, he could have asked me what Robin's diet was like. Plus they checked his hemoglobin and it was 10.8, so clearly he's getting plenty.

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  • Glad you're trying out a different ped! Hopefully you will like this one more.

     We haven't done cereal in ages. And when we were, it was pretty sporadic. My ped never pushed it. But we were exclusive formula around 6 months, so that probably makes a difference.

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  • I'd say you're doing just fine with food and to follow your instincts and gut.  As for WCM, go with your gut on that as well.  We started with subbing out 1/3 of her bottle with WCM (4oz formula 2oz WCM) then we upped to 2/3 and this weekend just started giving her straight WCM in her sippy.  She practically weaned herself and takes only a sippy cup now and dropped her nighttime bottle on her own.  I was shocked.

    Second, I would say you need to find a new Ped.... that guy sounds like a real peach, and if he's been telling you to keep with the oatmeal, AND he's giving you outdated information on the milk intake, and saying no water, I'm side-eyeing him.

    Our ped (yesterday) said we're doing just right on giving water for snacks, WCM for meals, and making sure she has a rounded out intake of fruits, veggies, grains, meats (or at least trying)... Just keep going with what you're doing, sounds like you're on the right track getting him to gain weight, and that's all you, not your ped!

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  • We were told to do cereal with every meal for iron because Rob's iron was low at 9 mos. Maybe that's why? We've been doing baby oatmeal just for breakfast and then Cheerios throughout the day since they have high iron, but there are other foods that have high iron too.
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