Lately I have just had the awful feeling that I need a break from DS. I love him dearly, but I am physically and mentally exhausted. I feel absolutely horrible for thinking this too!!
I work full time, deal with probably 3 hours of commute time a day, do 99% of childcare myself as DH works 80 hours a week, do all household things myself (laundry, cleaning, etc.). DS is a difficult baby on top of this (he won't take a bottle or sippy cup, he refuses to eat, he has a TON of energy, he doesn't sleep or nap great, etc.). There are even days I feel like almost happy to go into work because he is so high maintenance, my actual job is less work!! I also haven't slept in for basically a year as I do all the overnight wakeups myself and let DH sleep in on weekends due to his work schedule.
Saturday DH and I had a "date night" which was probably only the third time this had happened all year. We have been fighting constantly and were actually going to end things recently, so we are trying to make more effort. Well I since being away from DS on Saturday for several hours, I thought I would be fine with him all day by myself on Sunday, but I started to feel irritable with him first thing in the morning. I feel awful, how can I be irritable with him when I am away from him all week at work? He won't eat unless he is playing and I have to follow him around with a spoon sneaking food in his mouth, so this triggered my irritability I guess. He is also SUPER clingy and needy at home. I've found he is better if we go out in public (shopping, to the pool, etc.) so he can look around.
Has anyone else felt like this? I feel AWFUL but I just feel like I need a few days away from him. I've traveled for work and had a few days away, but no real vacation aside from a one night away once or twice. Is it normal to feel this way once in a while? I think about being away from him though and I know I would miss him, so I feel so conflicted.