mobile: Vent: Dealing with in-laws (long)
I'm so sick of FIL and his wife. And I hate to feel like this because I don't want to influence the way DD feels about them just because I don't like them. My mother did that to me, and now I don't talk to my father's side of the family.
We went to a wedding this weekend in New Orleans. FIL asked about 2 months ago if we were planning to leave DD with my mother or somebody. Well, no. First of all my mother lives 3 hrs away from us, and I'm just not ready to be away from DD for an entire weekend. Then about a month ago, he said we'd have more fun at the wedding if we didn't bring DD. So I started to get the feeling he didn't want her there. Then last week, he asked if we'd be willing to have a babysitter stay with DD in the hotel room. Sure, I have no problem with that. Once we're at the wedding and reception, I realize that it's a "no children" wedding. Oh, so why didn't you just say that?! Instead he made us feel like we weren't wanted there.
There were also some issues on Saturday that I won't really get into, but it boils down to him making us feel like the baby is a burden. He doesn't ever want to hold her. He'll barely even look in our direction. He actually got mad at DH when we were 15 mins late to meeting for lunch. We wanted the baby to finish her nap, and he said "Well that's not my problem." He's just so rude, disrespectful, and mean. He was throwing a fit about some people he saw walking around New Orleans. He was calling them some pretty hateful names because of the way they were dressed. Who cares what other people do?! How can somebody just be so mean.
The thing is DH makes excuses for him and just ignores it. I want DD to have a good grandfather in her life. My father's not in the picture, so this man is it. I loved my grandfather so much, and it breaks my heart to think that DD might not get that experience because I don't know how much I can stand to be around this man anymore. I've been with DH for 13 years, and now with a baby, I think I've had enough. I tried to get a picture of them together because she's only a baby once. I handed her to him, and he just awkwardly held her and didn't smile for the picture. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm just glad they don't live close. We only have to deal with him a few times a year. Next is the baptism in August. I pray I have enough strength to deal with him!
Thanks for letting me vent so early on a Monday morning. Here's some danishes for reading this entire thing!
BFP#1 3/8/12; diagnosed w/ Anencephaly at 12w6d; D&C 5/9/12
BFP#2 7/18/12; A/S 10/26/12 It's a Girl! EDD 3/29/13
Phoebe Jordan Born 3/20/13