Baby Names

"Stealing" family names?

My MIL's cousin has four kids, and three of their names are on our list- Thomas (which we will almost definitely use, it's my grandmother's maiden name and we love it), Charlotte, and Louisa. I don't think it would be THAT big of a deal to use one of the same names, but would it be strange if we used more than one? I'm in love with Louisa if we have a girl, maybe even as a MN.

If it matters, they live in the same city (really close to us, actually), but we don't see them super often, maybe every few months at a grad party or casual family thing. It's not like they'll be running around together at Christmas or anything though. 

Re: "Stealing" family names?

  • I think you could get away with using one of the names but I'd side eye using more than one.  
  • It might be weird to use more than one as FNs. Thomas as a FN and Louisa as a MN would probably be OK.

    And it would only be weird to use both because they live near by and you see them. I have no idea what my MIL's cousin's kids are named, so I have no idea if I have copied them...



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  • It might be weird to use more than one, but it you love them, you should use them.  Your MIL's cousin is stretching the family connection a bit, in my opinion.  I would hesitate if were a sibling/BIL/SIL that had used the name.


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  • We considered using one of my MILs cousin's boys names. I think using 3 out of their four children's names is definitely strange. One, totally fine. It's unfortunate because maybe you liked the names before you knew them but it would be odd.
  • I agree with PP's you can probably get away with one, but not both as FN's... 
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  • I don't think I would use more than one. Louisa is beautiful by the way.
  • SpookoSpooko
    10000 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its Combo Breaker
    Another vote for 1 but not 2+. And I think you're better off using Thomas if you can justify it bc of the family connection.

  • image BootsyLou:
    I think you could get away with using one of the names but I'd side eye using more than one.  


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  • image BlueDot818:
    I agree with PP's you can probably get away with one, but not both as FN's... 



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  • image BootsyLou:
    I think you could get away with using one of the names but I'd side eye using more than one.  

    This. I also think Thomas and Charlotte are pretty popular, common names, Louisa not as that one may get more of a side eye.

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  • image BootsyLou:
    I think you could get away with using one of the names but I'd side eye using more than one.  


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  • I believe MIL's cousin's kids are far enough away in family terms that I wouldn't even care!

    I don't even know my MIL's cousin's kids. Well, wait a minute, my husband knows my mom's cousin's kids and I still don't think it would matter. We see them a 3 times a year and live in the same town! Granted, they are all high school graduates. 

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  • The way you word this is so strange. Your "MIL's cousins" are also your husband's cousins. So why wouldn't you just call them that? And their kids? Also your husband's cousins.
  • Thanks for the replies. My thoughts were that one (Thomas or Louisa) would be okay, but not both. Or all three... really don't think I could ever do that. Haha. My H and I joked about it, though. "Hey, cool names... we're going to use them too." Anyway, guess we'll see what happens. I fall in and out of love with names these days so it probably won't matter anyway!

     And to PP who said I worded it weird, I don't know, the whole 'first/second cousins' or 'cousin once removed' thing confuses me. The woman is my husband's mom's cousin, so that's what I said. I don't know why it's strange.

  • 5555
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    The children would be your husband's second cousins. Their children and your children would be third cousins to one another. 

    Evidently, I was supposed to be named Ashley, but a month before I was born, my second cousin Ashley was born. My name became one of the many 1980s variations on "Lindsay." I have never met the Ashley who was born before me and took my name, but apparently my dad liked her mother, his cousin, enough to not step on her toes. 

    I'm watching all our friends gobble up the short list of names I've loved forever, so I definitely understand your frustrations. I think if you're not going to spend a ton of time with these people and the kids aren't going to be the same age, you can get by with 1-2 first names and maybe using another as a middle name.  

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  • I love Louisa, I don't think it's a big deal but I would probably chicken out and not use that name.
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