Stay at Home Moms

Thinking about being a SAHM

Thinking about being a SAHM.... And wondering if you ladies could give me a few points. I've been off of work for the summer living off DH's income alone and it has worked out great. As of now, I am planning to go back to work in October. When you first became a SAHM, what did you do to know you could do it? Did you build up a savings cushion? Try living on one income? We have a decent amount saved now. I just am thinking about going back to work to build up more savings then quit. What did you do to plan to make things work? Thanks!!

 

Re: Thinking about being a SAHM

  • Tbd143Tbd143
    250 Answers Fifth Anniversary 500 Comments Combo Breaker
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    Ours just happened. DH got promoted and we had to relocate. Between his traveling every week and what I could make in the new area vs. daycare, the decision made itself.
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  • SAH and working were both on the table for me when we planned our life together; we just waited until our first live birth to make the ultimate decision.  Knowing this, we lived off 1 income until DS was born and put most of my income into savings.  (We did make a few splurges because we had the money and the time before DS arrived.)  When I was taken off work for bed rest and extended maternity leave, this really helped since my income took a hit and the medical bills started coming.  I went back to work for about 5 months before becoming a FT SAHM, and most of that income went to replenishing our savings.  I'm happier at home, and we can live comfortably off just DH's income.

    I think it is unwise to find a new job knowing that you only plan to work a few months before quitting.  In my situation, I had FMLA, disability, and an understanding boss at a job I'd held for several years in my favor.  I would have handled working very differently if I were in your position.

    Preemie Resources: http://preemiemomblog.blogspot.com/

    DD1: BFP July 2010...HG in first tri, MC delivered vaginally at 18 weeks October 2010

    DS: BFP December 2011...SCH at 5 weeks, SBR at 7 weeks, Placental Abruption at 13 weeks, Hospitalized at 25 weeks, pPROM at 28 weeks, PTL via CS at 31 weeks 

    DD2: BFP January 2013...P17 shots, delivered via VBAC at 39 weeks
  • image CurlingRocks:
    SAH and working were both on the table for me when we planned our life together; we just waited until our first live birth to make the ultimate decision.nbsp; Knowing this, we lived off 1 income until DS was born and put most of my income into savings.nbsp; We did make a few splurges because we had the money and the time before DS arrived.nbsp; When I was taken off work for bed rest and extended maternity leave, this really helped since my income took a hit and the medical bills started coming.nbsp; I went back to work for about 5 months before becoming a FT SAHM, and most of that income went to replenishing our savings.nbsp; I'm happier at home, and we can live comfortably off just DH's income.I think it is unwise to find a new job knowing that you only plan to work a few months before quitting.nbsp; In my situation, I had FMLA, disability, and an understanding boss at a job I'd held for several years in my favor.nbsp; I would have handled working very differently if I were in your position.


    It's actually the same job I've had for 4 years. I am a nanny for a couple older kids and my boss gave me the summer off with no pay because she didn't think I would be able to keep up while being pregnant. I was glad to have the time off and am really dreading going back in October. Your situation sounds just like mine! We have a good amount saved and splurged on a couple things for the house because we were able to. And I am thinking about returning to work for a few months to help build up more savings and then quit.

     

  • image AACaHa13:
    image CurlingRocks:
    SAH and working were both on the table for me when we planned our life together; we just waited until our first live birth to make the ultimate decision.nbsp; Knowing this, we lived off 1 income until DS was born and put most of my income into savings.nbsp; We did make a few splurges because we had the money and the time before DS arrived.nbsp; When I was taken off work for bed rest and extended maternity leave, this really helped since my income took a hit and the medical bills started coming.nbsp; I went back to work for about 5 months before becoming a FT SAHM, and most of that income went to replenishing our savings.nbsp; I'm happier at home, and we can live comfortably off just DH's income.I think it is unwise to find a new job knowing that you only plan to work a few months before quitting.nbsp; In my situation, I had FMLA, disability, and an understanding boss at a job I'd held for several years in my favor.nbsp; I would have handled working very differently if I were in your position.
    It's actually the same job I've had for 4 years. I am a nanny for a couple older kids and my boss gave me the summer off with no pay because she didn't think I would be able to keep up while being pregnant. I was glad to have the time off and am really dreading going back in October. Your situation sounds just like mine! We have a good amount saved and splurged on a couple things for the house because we were able to. And I am thinking about returning to work for a few months to help build up more savings and then quit.
    I doubt our situations are just like each other, not that I feel like going into detail about my leave which was all unplanned and medically necessary. 

    That being said, if you don't need to return to work and don't want to, in this situation, I would give them notice now to prevent a bad recommendation in the future.  But also realize that SAH is not always what people think it will be, so if you are not sure that you want to SAH, stay on and give notice when you decide.

    Preemie Resources: http://preemiemomblog.blogspot.com/

    DD1: BFP July 2010...HG in first tri, MC delivered vaginally at 18 weeks October 2010

    DS: BFP December 2011...SCH at 5 weeks, SBR at 7 weeks, Placental Abruption at 13 weeks, Hospitalized at 25 weeks, pPROM at 28 weeks, PTL via CS at 31 weeks 

    DD2: BFP January 2013...P17 shots, delivered via VBAC at 39 weeks
  • We cut down our spending and gave up extras to make our budget work with DH's income.
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  • So our process to decide I would SAH was kind of unique. We were living in CA (3000 miles from any family). LO was born in December and I went back to work about 5 weeks later. My employer was really understanding about letting me extend my maternity so I only worked part time for about 12 more weeks. Then the buster went into daycare so I could finish out the school year with my students. During this time we had a pregnancy scare and I said to the hubby "we are going home". I just couldn't imagine staying there any longer without any familial support. We ended up leaving CA in June with a trailor and 6 month old. 

    Financially we were able to save a lot when we were working in CA. I was looking at returning to work this coming school year but the real cost of daycare and the time loss with the baby is not worth it. I work in universities and because of where we live the baby would be at daycare for 10 hours a day! CRAZY!

    Since you are already a nanny, you prob have a pretty good idea of what staying home with baby will be like. But I would say make sure you have some peers! Mommy and me or a book club of something to get out of the house. 

  • The decision was kind of made for me due to certain circumstances. Being a SAHM has been up and down for me. There are times I love it, and there are times I miss working. In the beginning I would say i was more miserable, however after about 3-4 months I started to love it. Now with another baby due any day now I know I will be busy. The hardest part for me about staying at home is seeing what I do as valuable as opposed to making money. When I keep myself active and not staying in the house all of the time, I feel so much better. That is probably why at first I was unhappy because it was the middle of winter. Overall I am happy to be home with my son and he is so happy and learning so much! I plan to start homeschooling him when he turns 3 next year and that will keep me busy as well. 
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