Baby Showers

So annoyed.

One of my friends is pregnant with her first baby.  I love planning parties so I offered 2 months ago to help with her shower.  I don't know the girls that are hosting it, so just told the mom to pass on my email address if they wanted any help.  Never heard from them. The shower is on July 20th.  None of us have received invitations yet. Yesterday the host emails me asking if I'd like to take care of the cake and the games. I reply back that I'm happy to take care of the cake, but I hate games, so I am not a good choice to plan those. I ask her what the theme is, so we can coordinate the cake. (And because I haven't seen an invitation yet, I have no idea what they are thinking for a theme.)  She replies back that they were doing an Animals theme but also incorporating pirates and nautical.  Um...?  That sounds like a hot mess.  Also that she doesn't like shower games either, so could I just please handle that, and also the prizes too.  Uh, no.  And I asked if there would be alcohol at the shower and she said "there will be sangria, and cucumber water for the non-drinkers.  Do you want to bring some other kind of drinks?"

 

I don't know if she's never planned a shower before, or what?  But I'm having a REALLY hard time with the fact that she's wanting me to plan (and pay for) all of this stuff with 2 weeks notice.  I have 2 young kids and a busy schedule, I am not jumping through hoops to plan a shower that I haven't even received an invitation to yet?!?

 And I don't want to let the mom-to-be know any of this, because I don't want to stress her out.  But I certainly don't want our mutual friends thinking "oh Jen planned the shower?" when there aren't invitations, the d?cor and theming sucks, and freaking cucumber water is the only non-alcoholic beverage option.

 Who gives two weeks notice to plan a shower?!!?

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Re: So annoyed.

  • Stand firm. "As I said, I'll do the cake. I'm unable to help w the game or prizes. Cucumber water sounds great!" Even if it doesn't....

    Get a cake with one of those themes and call it a day. You're NOT the hostess. You don't need to save the day for them.
    "Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
    ~Benjamin Franklin

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  • image EastCoastBride:
    Stand firm. "As I said, I'll do the cake. I'm unable to help w the game or prizes. Cucumber water sounds great!" Even if it doesn't.... Get a cake with one of those themes and call it a day. You're NOT the hostess. You don't need to save the day for them.

    Oh trust me, I won't be doing anything else.  I have another friend that was interested in helping, so I cc'd her on the email I sent, and she and I are going to split the cost of the cake (it will be around $60, we both love this bakery and we are cake snobs), and now the Hostess is trying to pressure her into the games!

    I am just so appalled I don't really know how to reply to her.

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • image EastCoastBride:
    Stand firm. "As I said, I'll do the cake. I'm unable to help w the game or prizes. Cucumber water sounds great!" Even if it doesn't.... Get a cake with one of those themes and call it a day. You're NOT the hostess. You don't need to save the day for them.

    THIS 100% 

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  • Just throwing this out there... If nobody likes games, why have them?

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  • image SingleMom31:
    Just throwing this out there... If nobody likes games, why have them?

    Mom to be wants them, I guess she's the only person that enjoys them lol
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • Well, I wouldn't drive yourselves crazy with anything.  Because with less than 2 weeks notice to guests (assuming invitations arrive on Monday), I'm guessing there aren't going to be too many who will be available to attend.
     
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  • Tell her you got the entertainment covered but don't actually plan any games. Then nobody has to play any stupid games!
  • To play devil's advocate for a minute, your post says that you love to plan parties and offered to help with this shower. I am confused about why you are now ticked off to be asked to help with the shower.

    I understand that you say you have kids and are busy, but wasn't that also true when you offered to help?
  • image BeckyTheEngineer:
    To play devil's advocate for a minute, your post says that you love to plan parties and offered to help with this shower. I am confused about why you are now ticked off to be asked to help with the shower.

    I understand that you say you have kids and are busy, but wasn't that also true when you offered to help?

    Um, 14 days notice?! I offered over 2 months ago and would have been happy to help then. But 2 weeks? That's crazy. That's not enough time to throw a party the way I like to do it. If they would have asked with even 4 weeks notice, I would have been glad to assist.

    I am shocked that anyone is defending this "hostess".
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • Dang that's annoying. You could tell her the same thing I always told my students- your poor planning and organization are not my emergency. 

    If you are concerned about what your friends will think you could easily just throw another shower for your friend. This way everyone will know how AMAZING your party planning skills are. Also it will give momma the chance to get another haul of gifts since few people will be able to attend at such short notice.

    Ultimately, I'm hearing a lot of anger in your posts tho and that is not going to make a happy party for anyone. Do the cake and move on or plan your own party. 

  • image BeckyTheEngineer:
    To play devil's advocate for a minute, your post says that you love to plan parties and offered to help with this shower. I am confused about why you are now ticked off to be asked to help with the shower. I understand that you say you have kids and are busy, but wasn't that also true when you offered to help?

    With two weeks notice?  Sorry.  If you want someone to help you plan something like this, you don't call them at the 11th hour.  It's rude and irresponsible hosting. There's no defending this. 

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  • image The_Jen626:
    image BeckyTheEngineer:
    To play devil's advocate for a minute, your post says that you love to plan parties and offered to help with this shower. I am confused about why you are now ticked off to be asked to help with the shower.

    I understand that you say you have kids and are busy, but wasn't that also true when you offered to help?

    Um, 14 days notice?! I offered over 2 months ago and would have been happy to help then. But 2 weeks? That's crazy. That's not enough time to throw a party the way I like to do it. If they would have asked with even 4 weeks notice, I would have been glad to assist.

    I am shocked that anyone is defending this "hostess".

    The hostess asked for a cake and some games. Do you really need over a month to put together a couple games? It's a baby shower, not the Olympics.
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