Baby Showers

Bridal shower Poll (OK people come in!)

I couldn't make a clicky poll but I just wanted to poll you all and see what the consensus is.  In my area (MN), we give a gift at the bridal shower (if we're invited) and another gift at the wedding.  My MIL and her family is from Oklahoma, and they only give one gift--either at the shower or the wedding.  So if they are invited to the shower they give their wedding gift at the shower.  If they don't attend a shower then they bring their gift to the wedding.  

So what do you do, and what state are you from?  Shower gift separate from wedding gift, or just one gift total? I am especially interested in what other Oklahomans have to say.

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Re: Bridal shower Poll (OK people come in!)

  • Well I am from CA.

     

    For my wedding I got gifts at the bridal shower and the wedding. The bridal shower gifts were sexy lingere, bath soaps, massage lotions, etc. The gifts that we received from the wedding were from our BBB/Target registry.

     

    My BFF who is also from CA only received gifts at the bridal shower, and it was off of the registry (so no lingere etc). 

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  • I'm from Ontario. I got separate gifts at showers and at my wedding. The gifts at my showers were generally much smaller than what I got for my wedding and were according to shower theme. 

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  • I'm in IL, Chicago area. I've always known them to be two separate events, and therefore bought two separate gifts.

    The shower is smaller, mostly female relatives and closer friends, and I usually bring a physical gift off of the registry in the $40-80 range, depending on how I'm connected to the person.

    The wedding is bigger, more friends, coworkers, and other people in the couple's life beyond family & closest friends. I usually bring a card with a check, anywhere from $75-200, depending on how I'm connected to the person, and what my personal finances allow me to give at that moment.

    Everyone who was at my bridal shower also attended my wedding, and I cannot think of anyone who brought a present to the shower but didn't bring something else to the wedding. 

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  • From CT originally.
    Gift at shower.
    Cash gift at wedding.
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  • Wisconsin- gift at shower, gift or money at wedding
       
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  • Mid-Atlantic region here.

    If I'm invited to the shower and the wedding, I give a gift for both.  The shower gift is usually less expensive.  If I'm in the wedding party or co-hosting the shower, I usually go in with other hostesses on a larger gift.  That's just the tradition with my close girlfriends, though.

    It's not usually the custom here to invite every female wedding guest to the shower.  Shower guests are usually relatives and close friends of the couple.  So, if I'm going to a shower, it's for someone I'm close to.  Also, I've been married for a while, so the shower is a chance for me to give something from ME to the bride.  The wedding gift comes from both DH and I.

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  • MN girl here too!

    Bridal Shower: Gift or gift card depending on what is left on the registry.

    Wedding: Gift or gift card or cash

    Bachlorette Party: Lingere and or alcohol (think Hot Sex liquor)

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  • NY born and raised.  We gift at the shower (typically a useful/needed item like pots and pans, knife set, etc) and again at the wedding (typically a check).

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  • I'm from Chicago.

    Gifts at the shower, cash at the wedding. 

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  • From VA, gift from the registry for about $50-$60 for the shower and a check or gift for the wedding for $150-$200 depending if we're close to people or if we've travelled to the wedding.
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  • image coopsbaby:
    Wisconsin gift at shower, gift or money at wedding

    All of this.
  • I'm from Newfoundland (Canada). I gift at the Shower (if I am invited and attend) and at the Wedding. Shower gift depends on the person. I've given cash, but I've also given Lingerie. Wedding gift is typically cash (more than I would give at the shower) or something from the registry if they have one.


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  • I'm from South Carolina, and I've always known people to give a gift at the shower and at the wedding.  If you're invited to both, depending on budget, you may give two smaller gifts.
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  • I live in CT but grew up in Mass.  Only family and close friends are generally invited to showers, and they bring separate shower gifts to the shower and a wedding gift to the wedding.

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  • Born in California, spent most of my time growing up in Virginia. 

    I was raised to give a gift for a shower, even if I don't attend.  And then to do a separate gift for the wedding, again, even if I don't attend.  I seem to be somewhat of an oddity on that one though. 
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  • image coopsbaby:
    Wisconsin- gift at shower, gift or money at wedding

    Same! 

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  • image Estwd2:
    From CT originally. Gift at shower. Cash gift at wedding.

    This is pretty much how we do it in the NY metro as well.

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  • MD.  I'm like you. If I go to the shower, I give a gift, then I give a wedding gift. 

    But it all comes out of one budget.  If I say "$100" - then it's either two gifts split between that, or one gift for that full amount

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  • I am from Kansas, but live in OK. Both places I believe do the one gift total.
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  • image JoeLies:
    I live in CT but grew up in Mass.nbsp; Only family and close friends are generally invited to showers, and they bring separate shower gifts to the shower and a wedding gift to the wedding.


    From Michigan. This is what we do too.

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  • image BlondieBia21:
    I am from Kansas, but live in OK. Both places I believe do the one gift total.

    Born and raised in KS, and I never show up empty handed to any function. I gift at both. Typically a gift at the bridal shower, and a card with cash to the wedding. 

     
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  • I live in AL, it is one gift.
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  • I give two smaller gifts if I'm invited to both and one larger one if I only go to the wedding. Shower gifts I spend around $40-75 depending who it is and wedding gifts are from the registry between $100-200.

    I'm in AL. 


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  • I am from MA. I give a gift for both (if invited to the shower). 
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  • I'm from Kansas (so, close!) and for my wedding and bridal shower, I got gifts for both. It was a pretty even mixture of gifts or cash/gift cards at the wedding. The shower gift was generally smaller. This is what I've always thought to be the norm in my area!
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  • San Francisco

    Gift at shower-usually 50-60 bucks and from WS (where everyone seems to register) unless there is a theme and nothing from WS works

    Gift at wedding-200-300 depending on how close I am to the person and I usually get china/silver/serving pieces from Gumps or Bloomingdales (again, where everyone seems to register)

    I also give engagement party gifts. It is usually nice wine or champagne unless it is a formal party with real invites (not some email thing). If it is a formal party, then I give something off the registry. 

    It is rare to give cash. I think we got two checks total.

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  • I live in Massachusetts and we give a gift for the shower, which is usually from WS and costs between 5060 and for the wedding we also give a gift, which is typically 200 plus cash.
  • image Estwd2:
    From CT originally. Gift at shower. Cash gift at wedding.

    I am from PA and this is what we do 

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  • I'm from Michigan. Gift at shower, money at wedding.

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