November 2012 Moms

SIL problem

I know, I'm sure none of you can relate <internet sarcasm>

I had plans with SIL last night (who recently moved to a new place) to get together for dinner.  Well, last minute, DH picked up a shift at work during the evening, so that he could have the weekend free for us all to go down to Cape Cod with family.  otherwise, he'd have to work.  of course, he took the work.

I emailed SIL yesterday during the day to let her know I'd have the kids in tow, to which she replies "no problem!".  After work, I pick them up around 6PM, and call her to give her our ETA

On the phone she's rude, short, and i can tell something is up.  After prying it out of her, she explains how she's mad at my FIL  (for no good reason, for leaving a light on in her house when he went over to fix something.  "he's a flucking idiot, and a$$hole, i dont know why i ask him to do anything, etc.) and this has clearly sent her over the edge.  I can tell she's just having a day.  i ask if it's still a good time to get together or if we should reschedule.  her answer "whatever". 

Ok.  So, i call her back once I get home to re-pack my diaper bag to head over.  She's still pissy, beyond pissy in fact.  And at this point, its 7 (bedtime in an hour) I'd be happy to push bedtime every once in a while, but #1, we're on the verge of a long weekend of late nights for the kids, and adding another unnecessary one spells disaster, and #2, she's clearly not in the mood for company.  So i ask if we can reschedule, and i get a "whatever, if you have to blow me off, fine". 

Needless to say, I don't go over.  I email this AM (as we always do) and she's just edgy.  We're spending the next 4 days toghether at the cape, at my IL's house no less, and im on foreign territory with no DH til Saturday.  I'm dreading this weekend.

No real purpose I guess, unless you have insight on how i should handle this.  Do i push the issue, and continue to apologize and ask for her understanding, or do I leave it alone? 

She's the grudge-y type, however, and also sort of the golden child in the family.  IE - problems w/ her = problems with everyone.  For that reason, i do my best to always make nice.  Ugh.

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Re: SIL problem

  • Wow - that was so long.  Kudos to anyone who reads it all.  Here's a drink Beer
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  • JKVogtJKVogt
    250 Answers 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary
    member
    I always just play nice with the IL and their spouses. Some of them are beyond irritating at times. But I also have DH that sees what I see. Andplusalso, SFIL isn't afraid to call people out. So, I say play nice.

    Thanks for the drink.
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  • Ick, crappy situation. I always play nice too. It sucks to just let it roll off your back, but it is for the best when it comes to family and in laws. Good luck!
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  • image JKVogt:
    I always just play nice with the IL and their spouses. Some of them are beyond irritating at times. But I also have DH that sees what I see. Andplusalso, SFIL isn't afraid to call people out. So, I say play nice. Thanks for the drink.

    This. Let it go. She clearly had something else going on unless she really would get that angry over something ridiculous. You didn't do anything wrong to apologize for. I would just act like nothing happened and be a happy jolly gal. 

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  • IdaniIdani
    Ancient Membership 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
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    She sounds like a pain in the arse and someone I would personally have a problem keeping my big mouth shut around.  I would have a countdown in my head for my husbands arrival  and I would try to have fun with my kids.  If she continues to have attitude I would just limit my contact alone with her.  She seems like the type to thrive on drama and someone who would play this out the whole time and try to make it all about her and make you feel bad.  I wouldn't give her to opportunity.
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  • thanks girls - you're all right.  I talked with DH about it - and he said what you're all saying.  Its sort of her nature anyway, so just leave it alone. 

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  • Don't push it. Have fun wo her. Don't let her make the weekend awkward. Ignore it
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