January 2013 Moms

Are you kidding? (DH vent).

So, this week with our little one has been a doozy. He is having serious teething trouble, and has been miserable. I am a SAHM so i have been flying solo for most of the crying, chewing, crappy naps, and over eating. FFWD to this weekend, and my H took him for a couple hours yesterday so i could get my hair cut (Ugh.. That is a whine for another day), but interrupted us several times asking me what to do for him.. He knows the drill.. We have been doing this for months (DS has had the same few teeth cut, and then recede like 6 times now poor kid, hopefully the pedi can shed some light on what's up). Then the rest of the day i had the baby. Not a huge deal, a little annoying, but it's okay. Then this morning i got the baby and let my husband sleep in since i know he has a really long week ahead prepping his unit for deployment. When he woke up, at 10 a.m, i asked if he could take the baby for an hour or so, so i could get a nap before we deal with our grocery trip, and selling some furniture we're getting rid of, and continuing my summer cleaning spree. He says sure, takes the kid, i curl up on the couch and doze. For about 20 minutes, when my son's fussing wakes me up, i keep my eyes closed figuring my H will take care of the baby and i can doze back off til my hour is up. Then i hear it. My husband is playing a video game.. The baby is on the floor on his play mat, fussing and wanting to be played with, and my H is ignoring him. The baby starts actually crying, and i look at my husband, just sitting there, and snap. And as rationally as i can in that moment, tell him that all his son wants is some freaking attention.. Then he has nerve to get ticked at me! Am i being a crazy, sleep deprived, PMSy, harpy here? Or would this bug you too? I just feel like it is so childish and irresponsible..
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Re: Are you kidding? (DH vent).

  • It would bug me :
    Sorry about the rough week with teething. I know how you feel. Hang in there Mama!
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  • b0710b0710
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    It would bug me. Sorry he's not stepping up for you right now! I also wanted to add, I'm not a pedi but DS1 went through the same thing with his teeth. Almost every one seemed to come up and go back down at least 4 times until they finally poked through for good. My dr said that is unfortunately normal and every kid is different when it comes to teething. Best of luck with that, it's no fun!
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  • It sounds like my DH too. Before DS was STTN, I would go to bed early since I would get up with him. So often I would have to go back out after an hour because DS was whining or about to cry and DH just had to finish his game. It was sooooo frustrating and we fought about it quite a few times. No advice, really, but I understand and hope it gets better!
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  • I'd be angry too. I'm starting to wonder when the "I hate my husband" phase will pass. Sometimes I really, really don't like him.

     

  • I would be very frustrated too. Gosh, I love my DH but sometimes lately I feel like he's from a different planet, or ON a different planet...I dread going out with other people, because he has this weird tendency to get really into what everybody's talking about and also eating his food, and totally tunes out the baby and me. Inevitably something will happen where I need a hand, and he just stares at me and waits for someone else to help. Gah, I hate it, and it's almost embarrassing.
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  • I'd be angry too. DH does this kind of thing. I think they are just not as tuned in as we moms are, but especially moms who stay at home (I don't, but I admire those who do).

    DH gets the stupids sometimes, and I get angry when he doesn't realize what is going on around him. But I've come to figure out that it is more from just not being around the baby as much as I was in the beginning and a bit of a lack of confidence because he recognizes he didn't get as much bonding time as I did. It is kind of a vicious circle.

    However, like the ladies on this board once reminded me, it is easier to talk about what is happening when both of you are calm and rationale (hard to find that time, I know), than in the middle of an episode of the stupids. When DH and I finally got the chance to talk during some down time, it went much better and he is trying harder.

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