Trying to Get Pregnant

Do you tell your SO when you are ovulating

My husband would like me to tell him, but I feel hesitant because I think it could put a lot of pressure on him. 

What do you all do? 

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Re: Do you tell your SO when you are ovulating

  • I wouldn't recommend telling him. My DH wasn't in a good mood, and had a hangover so I had to tell him. Nothing would have happened otherwise. The next day when we were going to HIO again he felt too pressured. I'll never make that mistake again. I'll just seduce him.
    TTC since 3/13
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  • I told s/o when I was O'ing, he didn't have a problem with it. Lady things don't faze him though, he's a rare breed. He'll buy me tampons without a thought.

    "Your truth is different from my truth, and we're both right."

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  • If he asks, I will be honest. But I don't usually volunteer the info about my chart.
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  • I've told mine when I'm O'ing. He doesn't seem to mind. Besides, he seems to like all the attention he gets because of the short window we have to work with.

    ETA: He kind of gets the idea anyway when he sees me with the OPK and CBFM anyway.

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  • image teal owl:

    I told s/o when I was O'ing, he didn't have a problem with it. Lady things don't faze him though, he's a rare breed. He'll buy me tampons without a thought.

    This is me too. DH likes to know where I am in my cycle. He's interested in my chart. He likes to be involved. He buys me tampons, Glamour, and a Heath bar every CD 1. I know he's not the norm though. We aren't officially TTC yet but I will have to tell him when I'm O'ing when we start. He works 70+ hour weeks so we sometimes need to schedule sex. 

    I can see why guys would have performance issues because of it though because that is a lot of pressure. 


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  • Since I don't temp or use opks I don't know for sure when I O but I told my husband the general time when I thought I was. It didn't do anything to change him. I decided I want to keep it to myself more though because I don't want to make it all technical if we don't have to yet. He'll probably know anyway because I'll be seducing him a lot more than normal.




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  • I never say anything about my O date. But then he never asks me to tell him. I know my H doesn't want to know. But, if he asked then I would probably tell him.
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  • DH is super into TTC....so he wants me to tell him. I'm actually the one who feels a little strange about it.
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  • image teal owl:

    I told s/o when I was O'ing, he didn't have a problem with it. Lady things don't faze him though, he's a rare breed. He'll buy me tampons without a thought.

    Our DHs are a lot alike in this instance. My DH has 2 younger sisters & nothing phases him. Periods, ovulation, OPKs, pads, tampons, etc. He was also a biology major in college. He understands it all & I don't have to explain hardly anything.  I declared, very dramatically, during my last period that I was going to "bleed to death". He looked at me, shook his head & said "I seriously doubt it. There's not nearly as much blood coming out as you'd think". Smarty pants!

    Seriously, OP, if he wants to know, then tell him. If it affects him, don't tell him next time.

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  • stufiestufie
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    Yes I do.

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  • I have at times, and other times I haven't. I never really know when I am ovulating...so we just sort of DTD every 2 to 3 days.

    If this cycle is a BFN, then I'm going to start temping again so I have a better idea :) 


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  • He'd like to know, to give us the best chance. Nothing wrong with guys who don't want to know, though. Either way.

     My husband asked, I didn't ask him if he wanted to know. I am confident that if knowing about O made him crack under pressure, he'd ask not to know again. It kind of turns him on to know when I'm fertile, or so he says.

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    TTC since October 2011. PCOS, single fallopian tube. HSG showed tube was blocked (this is but one reason why you undergo testing BEFORE starting fertility meds, kiddos). TTC on hold due to DX of Stage IV lung cancer in August 2013, non-smoker. Cancer found due to blood clot in leg (WTF?) DX Stage IV adenocarcinoma of the lung, with liver and bone metastases. Genetic tests of tumor showed positive for rare ALK gene mutation (only 4% of lung cancer patients have it). Started Xalkori (oral chemo) 9/13/13. Scan on 10/30/13 shows lymph shrinkage (yay!). Hospitalized over Thanksgiving (12 days) due to fluid around heart. Underwent surgery to install pericardial window. Xalkori resistance confirmed. Started clinical trial for a new (3rd gen) ALK responsive drug on 12/13/13. Scan on 2/3/13 showed marked improvement. Lymph nodes are shrinking, right lung is opening up and the lesion on my liver has shrunk by more than 50%. CT scan on 3/31 showed marked improvements in both lung and liver, YES! PET scan in two months. 

     
     
  • Next cycle I will not tell him.  He didn't really say so but I could definitely tell he felt pressured. 
  • image HatchetFace:
    image teal owl:

    I told s/o when I was O'ing, he didn't have a problem with it. Lady things don't faze him though, he's a rare breed. He'll buy me tampons without a thought.

    This is me too. DH likes to know where I am in my cycle. He's interested in my chart. He likes to be involved. He buys me tampons, Glamour, and a Heath bar every CD 1.

    Bless his dear heart!

    "Your truth is different from my truth, and we're both right."

    TTC since March 2013. BFP 4/13/13, blighted ovum discovered 6/6/13, m/c 6/8/13.

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  • image CarolinaGirl83:
       I declared, very dramatically, during my last period that I was going to "bleed to death". He looked at me, shook his head & said "I seriously doubt it. There's not nearly as much blood coming out as you'd think". Smarty pants!

    Hahaha, that made me lol! Sounds like me...

    "Your truth is different from my truth, and we're both right."

    TTC since March 2013. BFP 4/13/13, blighted ovum discovered 6/6/13, m/c 6/8/13.

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  • He tracks my ovulating with me lol he really wants a baby

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  • ant331ant331
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    I tell DH. I don't go into too much detail, but he likes to know. He even asks if I did an OPK. We haven't had any issues up to date and he doesn't feel the pressure. You could try and see if it has an effect on him. If it does, then just don't mention it again :) HTH
  • I do not, but he's never asked.  He is a big time pee pusher though when he thinks there's any chance for a BFP.

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  • Nah, it kind of kills the spontaneous mood about it.
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  • image NotElsie:
    I wouldn't recommend telling him. My DH wasn't in a good mood, and had a hangover so I had to tell him. Nothing would have happened otherwise. The next day when we were going to HIO again he felt too pressured. I'll never make that mistake again. I'll just seduce him.

     

    Yes! Love this.  I think my SO got a little pressured or feelings of being "used" a bit the last time we tried, and probably would have preferred me not telling him about my CM or likely approaching FW.  He would definitely prefer the "seduction" approach.  Although, if I felt like I might miss an opportunity due to other circumstances, I would probably at least tell him I'm about to O.  He'd likely be fine with that as long as I left out other details.

  • I typically do not openly tell my DH, but if he asks I will tell him or at least say it's my fertile time.
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  • When we started trying I asked him if he wanted to know and he said yes, it wouldn't bother him. So when I got my first positive OPK I even showed it to him. He didn't have any problems! Just ask him how he feels about it. 
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  • I don't straight up tell him, but he can see the OPKs in the trash and knows that if I'm jumping him, chances are it's for a reason. Within a few days he'll ask me if my temp spiked (or if I "exploded", in his words. I don't get it either).
  • mine likes to know. He gives it his all during FW even though I know sometimes he gets tired.
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  • I tell him. He even starts to ask as it gets closer to O date. 

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  • I do but this last cycle seemed like there was a lot of pressure.  I think I'm going to be more casual with it and not tell him my temps and what my OPK's are doing.  Hopefully that can 'relax' him somewhat.
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  • I tell him if he needs to know, i.e, if he might be working late or we're going somewhere and need to get home to have sex.
    Tyler& Amanda 7.7.07
  • BBer4BBer4
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    I tell him what's going on. He has often asked too. It works for us.
  • dcRNdcRN
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    We have been charting for 4.5 years- we practice NFP so we chart to TTA when we aren't TTC.. He checks my chart daily so he knows whether or not he can get lucky that night ha! 

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