Working Moms

Starting to wonder...

if I'm the only one who doesn't have a nanny/mother's helper/house cleaner. 

I know it's about priorities for how to spend money, but with DH (breadwinner) out of a job and debt to pay off, it just isn't possible. It's hard to not have any extras. 

«1

Re: Starting to wonder...

  • You are not the only one.  As much as I'd love a house cleaner, we just don't have the $$$.  I always joke with DH that I need to get some technical skills and build us a "Rosie the Robot".  
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
    image image
  • My only "help" is daycare and a gardener. I scrub all my own toilets! And we have four ...
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • No
    We tried a house cleaner but had issues with all 3. And it was a pain figuring out what to do with the dog on cleaning days. Plus I am very particular about cleaning.

    I would love to outsource laundry though. I keep trying to get DH on board with this
  • skyejoskyejo
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    member
    No nanny, no mother's helper, no cleaning service, no family closer than 4 hours. The only thing I really go back and forth on is the cleaning service.  It would be nice but I'd rather just save the money. 
  • I don't have one but if I am working out of the house and so is H then if our budget allows for it we will get one.  We both want a clean home and I would rather spend the time with the kids even if it is just playing at home or outside so if our budget allows depending on what my possible new position will pay then we will get a house cleaner once every 2 weeks.  
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


    image

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • I didn't get a cleaning service until I returned to work after my 2nd baby.  And there is no way we would keep it if one of us was unemployed.  It is a luxury and it would be the first thing to get cut in my house.
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I feel the same way on this board sometimes! I don't have a cleaner, gardener, nanny, anything. I have my 11yo niece come babysit every once in a while so I can clean or work from home and I pay her $2-3/hour. 

    I agree that it's really hard not to have extras. We're paying off credit card debt right now and it HURTS to be so tightly budgeted, but I know it's for the best to get the debt gone as quickly as possible. 

    image

    image

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • It's just me, myself, and I.  Oh, and I guess DH.  Wink
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • hocushocus
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    member

    No you are not the only one. I'd guess that at least 30% of the folks on the board send their kids to daycare and don't have any home help. However with one parent at home I think you're more in line with the SAHM board which generally doesn't have much help. I'd guess that well of 60% of them don't use any sort of home services regularly.


    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker TickerBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • If I were in your sitution, and one of us was unemployed, I wouldn't have any extras either. We did hire a housekeeper to come every other week to clean after I had DS as I want to spend my free time with him since we both have demanding careers with long hours. DH and I are very much of the mindset that you live well within your means. We waited until our 30s to have a baby so that we would be in a better place financially to afford kids without having to sacrafice our lifestyle. We own a modest house, paid off our student loans, stayed away from bad debt, built an emergency fund, max our retirement accounts, and still save 10% of our income. Saving and being responsible is very important to us and when I start to feel jealous of others' luxuries, I remind myself how nice it is to know that we can pay for our own retirement and we won't burden DS with providing for us and that our priorities are our priorities for good reasons!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • image PrivacyWanted:
    No We tried a house cleaner but had issues with all 3. And it was a pain figuring out what to do with the dog on cleaning days. Plus I am very particular about cleaning. I would love to outsource laundry though. I keep trying to get DH on board with this

     

    I was just wondering about this. 

  • image hocus:

    No you are not the only one. I'd guess that at least 30% of the folks on the board send their kids to daycare and don't have any home help. However with one parent at home I think you're more in line with the SAHM board which generally doesn't have much help. I'd guess that well of 60% of them don't use any sort of home services regularly.

    I do have my husband at home but he's not a stay at home dad. He's job hunting, which is a full time job in itself. It would be nice if he could do dishes, vacuum, do home repair, etc. while I'm at work but his job is finding a job. We still split all the chores and child care after work hours just like we did when he was working.

     

  • image SandAndsSea:
    If I were in your sitution, and one of us was unemployed, I wouldn't have any extras either. We did hire a housekeeper to come every other week to clean after I had DS as I want to spend my free time with him since we both have demanding careers with long hours. DH and I are very much of the mindset that you live well within your means. We waited until our 30s to have a baby so that we would be in a better place financially to afford kids without having to sacrafice our lifestyle. We own a modest house, paid off our student loans, stayed away from bad debt, built an emergency fund, max our retirement accounts, and still save 10% of our income. Saving and being responsible is very important to us and when I start to feel jealous of others' luxuries, I remind myself how nice it is to know that we can pay for our own retirement and we won't burden DS with providing for us and that our priorities are our priorities for good reasons!

    Great encouragement! Thanks!

    We're also on a plan to be debt free. We would have been at the end of the year (except for our mortgage) if this job loss hadn't occurred. But I'm hoping this is a just a couple of months that we had to stop paying extra on our debt. Thankfully, the discipline of budgeting has made such a huge difference in getting through this.

     

  • You are not...definitely not.  Not by a long shot.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    image
    Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Weight Loss Tools

    The Shrinking Fat Chick
  • I don't have one but, I don't have babies. Technically anyways. Between Hubby and 2 big dogs I certainly feel like I have children. When I first moved in Hubby (then BF) had a cleaner but I found I was always cleaning before or after her anyways, I like things to tidy to leave the toilets and shower for 2 weeks between cleanings so it just wasn't worth the money to me, and I'm one of the rare people who actually enjoy cleaning and laundry so it's not something that I would probaby ever think of having. I might re-visit that when I have a toddler running around?

    I was listening to XM one morning and they were talking about cleaning ladies, whether it was a pretty common thing now or if it was a luxury and I'd say 80% of the people who called in or commented online said it was a common thing they had ... even being able to afford it I don't have it, I was pretty shocked  by that.

  • I would love to have someone clean...but DH is adamently against it. I don't have a nanny...or helper besides DH...who is pretty great at being my partner in crime. :) So, no you're not alone.
    AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickers Anniversary
  • A cleaning service is non-negotiable for us with our schedules and very demanding careers. However, if one of us was unemployed we would not have one. My DD goes to daycare, but I do have mother's helpers. This has a lot to do with the fact that DH is on deployment #6 and is gone a lot of the time. I am ALONE a lot and it's tough. I would give up other things before my mother's helpers/babysitters.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • No cleaning service and no nanny. We pay MIL to watch DD. She is very nice and offers to dust occasionally and she loads the dishwasher, but the majority of the housework falls to me and DH.

    Eta: I would love a cleaning service, I'm just not sure if we could swing the cost.
    Lilypie - (KNqh)
  • shannmshannm
    Ancient Membership 250 Answers 2500 Comments 250 Love Its
    member

    LOL, you are not the only one. 

    I saw someone ask what the point of working was if you still had to clean the house the other day.....ummmm......to eat and pay my bills? 


  • Nicb13Nicb13
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers Second Anniversary
    member
    I don't want those things. We have a pretty sweet routine we've established so we get our own crap done. No need to waste money on other people doing the work for us!

     

    image

    DS born 3/10/12 - Baby GIRL - due 10/5/14!

    BabyFruit Ticker

  • We don't.  I mean, I have a daycare provider which is kind of like a nanny, but not really.   

    DS/LO #1: Born March 2012 DS/LO #2: On his way! Due October 2013 image
  • I do not have any of those, I would love a housecleaner but we are trying to put more moneys in savings to rebuild it up (hubby was laid off for two months too)and I am reading one of Dave ramseys books to help pay off all debt. Then I will hopefully be able to get a cleaning lady.


  • We don't have any of those things either. My H is laid off right now so we just can't swing the cost. Even if he was working, I wouldn't put out the cash for those things. We're lucky enough though to be close to family so we have built in babysitters for date nights or things like that.
    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
  • We didn't have any help until we got all our ducks in a row. No debt besides our small mortgage, e-fund and retirement fully funded and a big promotion before we decided it was "worth it" And even now we don't have any cleaners or during the summer because both of our jobs tend to slow down in the summer and we work less hours.

    image
    a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.thebump.com/?
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • No, we don't either.  We could afford it, but I think it would be easier not to have to deal with the problems it can bring - dealing with someone who doesn't do the work, or not up to your standards, worrying about them breaking or stealing things, picking up so that they can do the vacuming/dusting/etc and so on.  
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • ccamccam
    5000 Comments 250 Answers 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    member
    I don't have any of those. 

    ___________________________________________________________________________

    Trying for #1 since May 2010   l   DX ~ Unexplained Infertility June 2011

    IUI #1&2 = BFN; IUI #3 = BFP, m/c @ 6 weeks

    November '11 ~ IVF#1 ~ ER 11/18 (29R, 17F) ~ 5dt of one beautiful blast on 11/23 = BFP!!

    Beta #1 9dp5dt = 116, P4 = 28 ~ Beta #2 13dp5dt = 700 ~ Beta #3 20dp5dt = 9500, P4 = 26

    1st u/s 12/27 - hb of 156!! EDD 8.10.12 :)   **TEAM GREEN!**

    Sweet baby boy born 8.18.12

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Trying for #2

    FET #1 - October '13 - c/p   l   FET #2 - December '13 - cancelled :(   l   FET #2.2 - 1.30.14 - BFN

    ~ More testing - hysteroscopy, endometrial biopsy & more b/w - all normal / negative~

    Surprise BFP while waiting on FET #3 ~ beta #1 500; beta #2 1600; first u/s 4/3 - measuring 5w5d, no hb yet!; 2nd u/s 4/10 - hb 132, measuring 6w6d - EDD 11.29.14 :)    **TEAM GREEN!**

     Pregnancy Ticker 

  • Nope not alone. We have no debt other than mortgage and student loans but we don't have a cleaning service or mother's helpers. My DCP watches only DS but it's at her house, so not a true nanny. My IL's babysit once every few months but nothing regularly scheduled. And it's at their house for just a few hours normally.

    Before LO2 arrives we will probably buy a car which is at least partly financed, although hopefully at 0 percent. After that we will consider a cleaner every two weeks if we think we need it with two kids to care for. But if we had any consumer debt or either of us were unemployed there is no way we'd hire a cleaner.

    FWIW I am NOT one of the people who loves to clean and my house is almost always not as clean as it should be. But that's life sometimes. We have other financial goals and concerns that we are putting above the comfort and luxury of someone else cleaning for us, at least for right now.
    DS: 2/17/11          DD: 9/4/13
  • Nope, we don't have one either. I would love one, but its just not in the budget.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    DD #1 passed away in January 2011 at 14 days old due to congenital heart disease
    DD#2 lost in January 2012 at 23 weeks due to anhydramnios caused by a placental abruption
  • While I'd love to have a cleaning lady, and I know a great one that we'd hire, it's just not in the budget right now. So our house isn't as clean as it could be but that's ok, we'll deal. At this point we have other priorities for our money and we can live with a little dust.

    If one of us were unemployed then there's no way we'd pay for niceties like a house keeper.



    imageimageimage"Lilypie">image"Lilypie">
  • We have daycare, but no cleaning person, gardner, etc.  My DH job searched and free lanced while taking care of 1 year old DD.  And I still expected him to help with some of the cooking and cleaning. :) Now that he's employed again, we're paying for 2 in daycare, saving for college, etc. equals not much left for a cleaning person.
«1
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards