February 2013 Moms

"Enjoy every minute"

I don't know about you ladies, but I hate it when people (usually parents with kids older than DS) tell me "It goes by so fast, enjoy every minute!".  For some reason I find it incredibly patronizing.  Yes, I know it goes by quickly, I don't need you to tell me so.  And quite frankly, I don't enjoy every minute, nor do I want to be made to feel guilty for not cherishing every single second of parenthood.  End rant.
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Re: "Enjoy every minute"

  • I can see why maybe it sounds patronizing, but I think people have good intentions.  I can totally see how an older woman could look at a small child and think back on all of the time she wished moments away that she now wishes she had back.  I think it's a sweet sentiment and when people say it to me I view it as a good reminder not to sweat the small stuff and just enjoy the ride.

        
  • image +adamwife+:

    I can see why maybe it sounds patronizing, but I think people have good intentions.  I can totally see how an older woman could look at a small child and think back on all of the time she wished moments away that she now wishes she had back.  I think it's a sweet sentiment and when people say it to me I view it as a good reminder not to sweat the small stuff and just enjoy the ride.

     

    This is a good point and I know they're coming from a good place in their hearts, but it still irritates me.  I think I'm just overly sensitive to it.

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  • image Meggiemuggins:
    image +adamwife+:

    I can see why maybe it sounds patronizing, but I think people have good intentions.  I can totally see how an older woman could look at a small child and think back on all of the time she wished moments away that she now wishes she had back.  I think it's a sweet sentiment and when people say it to me I view it as a good reminder not to sweat the small stuff and just enjoy the ride.

     

    This is a good point and I know they're coming from a good place in their hearts, but it still irritates me.  I think I'm just overly sensitive to it.

     

    I agree with both... I think I just find it irritating when I hear it like 60 times in two days... when I go a week without hearing it and then someone says it, it doesn't bother me as much!

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  • I also hate it when people say this to me. I personally can't wait for the newborn phase to be over with. Sure, she's adorable and I can hold her all the time but man it is a lot of work. I can't wait til she's 2, then I feel like I could actually enjoy activities with her and not just have my whole life consumed with giving her bottles and naps.
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  • image artroyer:
    image Meggiemuggins:
    image +adamwife+:

    I can see why maybe it sounds patronizing, but I think people have good intentions.  I can totally see how an older woman could look at a small child and think back on all of the time she wished moments away that she now wishes she had back.  I think it's a sweet sentiment and when people say it to me I view it as a good reminder not to sweat the small stuff and just enjoy the ride.

     

    This is a good point and I know they're coming from a good place in their hearts, but it still irritates me.  I think I'm just overly sensitive to it.

     

    I agree with both... I think I just find it irritating when I hear it like 60 times in two days... when I go a week without hearing it and then someone says it, it doesn't bother me as much!

     

    Totally!  I get tired of hearing it from every. single. person I meet at a function.  If I hear it occasionally, that's fine. 

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  • I hate when people say "just wait when he's older its soooo much harder." People told me how terrible being pregnant wold be, how hard labor would be, then how hard a newborn would be. All hard yes but not terrible, I actually loved it all.

     In general I guess I just hate unwarranted advice. So I totally agree.  

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  • image Meggiemuggins:
    I don't know about you ladies, but I hate it when people (usually parents with kids older than DS) tell me "It goes by so fast, enjoy every minute!".  For some reason I find it incredibly patronizing.  Yes, I know it goes by quickly, I don't need you to tell me so.  And quite frankly, I don't enjoy every minute, nor do I want to be made to feel guilty for not cherishing every single second of parenthood.  End rant.

    I think you will really like this, then.

    http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/04/2011-lesson-2-dont-carpe-diem/

    I've sang the praises of Glennon Doyle Melton earlier, but she really nails it with her thoughts on parenting sometimes, and I love sharing her stuff when I think someone else will really benefit from reading it.

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  • image DublinMama:

    image Meggiemuggins:
    I don't know about you ladies, but I hate it when people (usually parents with kids older than DS) tell me "It goes by so fast, enjoy every minute!".  For some reason I find it incredibly patronizing.  Yes, I know it goes by quickly, I don't need you to tell me so.  And quite frankly, I don't enjoy every minute, nor do I want to be made to feel guilty for not cherishing every single second of parenthood.  End rant.

    I think you will really like this, then.

    http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/04/2011-lesson-2-dont-carpe-diem/

    I've sang the praises of Glennon Doyle Melton earlier, but she really nails it with her thoughts on parenting sometimes, and I love sharing her stuff when I think someone else will really benefit from reading it.

     

    Yes 

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  • BNHarris-I LOVE this picture! Makes me smile. She is absolutely adorable!
    Me 37 DH 40 TTC since 1/11 DOR AMH .34 DH S/A Great BFP 12/11! MC 1/12 IUI #1 2/12 BFN. IUI #2 3/12 BFN. IUI #3 4/12 BFN IVF #1 5/12 BFP! DD 2/13/12
  • image fullfhope:
    BNHarris-I LOVE this picture! Makes me smile. She is absolutely adorable!


    Thank you! I see this face all the time but it still cracks me up every time :)
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  • image DublinMama:

    image Meggiemuggins:
    I don't know about you ladies, but I hate it when people (usually parents with kids older than DS) tell me "It goes by so fast, enjoy every minute!".  For some reason I find it incredibly patronizing.  Yes, I know it goes by quickly, I don't need you to tell me so.  And quite frankly, I don't enjoy every minute, nor do I want to be made to feel guilty for not cherishing every single second of parenthood.  End rant.

    I think you will really like this, then.

    http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/04/2011-lesson-2-dont-carpe-diem/

    I've sang the praises of Glennon Doyle Melton earlier, but she really nails it with her thoughts on parenting sometimes, and I love sharing her stuff when I think someone else will really benefit from reading it.

    I was just about to share the same article. You beat me to it :)

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  • I wish I'd enjoyed the first two months more. Hormones and heartbreak were making me crazy emotional. Now I look at newborn pics of LO and wish I could get a minute or two back to snuggle that squish with a slightly clearer head. 
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  • SagenSagen
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
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    Now that my daughter is almost nine I get told a lot "just you wait it she is a teen/pre-teen". Apparently I am in for something not too fun :) I read an article about it, the moody teen stage. I took my daughter shopping that night, just her and I and held her hand all through the store. Hopefully she won't hate me as much as everyone warns me that she in all probability will! Sometimes it is a good reminder to enjoy where you are at! I can see how it would get old hearing it all the time though.
    Mom to 4 cute kids, 10 y/o girl, 8, 6, and 1.5 y/o boys
    October Sig fav fall TV show- the Mindy Project
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  • LolaJrLolaJr
    100 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Love Its
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    I have to say I am so over hearing other moms with the 'just wait til...' I find it negative and annoying.

    When I was pregnant friends would say 'just wait til the 3rd trimester...', or 'just wait til labour' and now that DS is here its 'wait til he starts walking', 'on you're going to cloth diaper?...wait til he starts solids' etc, etc, etc. UGH! Well, thanks for the 'warning', but I CAN'T wait til all of the above occur because I am going to be growing and learning with him and making each experience my own! 

    I had a wonderful pregnancy and my labour was beautiful (I swear!). I love DS and although every step has had its moments of tears and frustration it is what I signed up for. I wasn't expecting it to be unicorns and butterflies. That said, I'm loving it!

    Maybe I'm just too positive.  

     Sorry to get off topic. I too can't stand when people say 'it goes so fast'.

    Okay, I'm done!

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  • image +adamwife+:

    I can see why maybe it sounds patronizing, but I think people have good intentions.  I can totally see how an older woman could look at a small child and think back on all of the time she wished moments away that she now wishes she had back.  I think it's a sweet sentiment and when people say it to me I view it as a good reminder not to sweat the small stuff and just enjoy the ride.

    This. Because honestly, as the parent of a teen, it does go by quickly. I wish my DS1 was cuddly and cute and sweet and acted like I am everything to him. In the realm of teens he is great, but it's no cake walk, some times I want to throttle him.

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  • image DublinMama:

    image Meggiemuggins:
    I don't know about you ladies, but I hate it when people (usually parents with kids older than DS) tell me "It goes by so fast, enjoy every minute!".  For some reason I find it incredibly patronizing.  Yes, I know it goes by quickly, I don't need you to tell me so.  And quite frankly, I don't enjoy every minute, nor do I want to be made to feel guilty for not cherishing every single second of parenthood.  End rant.

    I think you will really like this, then.

    http://momastery.com/blog/2012/01/04/2011-lesson-2-dont-carpe-diem/

    I've sang the praises of Glennon Doyle Melton earlier, but she really nails it with her thoughts on parenting sometimes, and I love sharing her stuff when I think someone else will really benefit from reading it.

    Awesome article. I also get annoyed by the people who say to enjoy every minute. Not because they don't mean well, but because I think they have obviously forgotten there are a lot of not so fun, actually horrible moments that simply cannot be enjoyed. 

    In a card my mom once sent me when DD1 was young, there was a phrase I will never forget. It said "the days pass so slowly, but the months and years go by so fast." And it is totally true. Sometimes, when both kids are crying or clamoring or both, each minute feels like an eternity. I do not enjoy those. I will not. No psychological trick can force me to do it. And yet, it's so hard to believe that DD2 is already almost 5 months old, and my little preemie DD1 is already 2! The time went by so fast! It's a crazy parenting time-warp paradox, I think.


    BFP1: DD1 born April 2011 at 34w1d via unplanned c/s due to HELLP, DVT 1 week PP
    BFP2: 3/18/12, blighted ovum, natural m/c @ 7w4d
    BFP3: DD2 born Feb 2013 at 38w4d via unplanned RCS due to uterine dehiscence

  • image BNHarris8:
    I also hate it when people say this to me. I personally can't wait for the newborn phase to be over with. Sure, she's adorable and I can hold her all the time but man it is a lot of work. I can't wait til she's 2, then I feel like I could actually enjoy activities with her and not just have my whole life consumed with giving her bottles and naps.

    Don't  worry, when she's two, you'll have a whole new set of things that are difficult to deal with and you'll be wishing she was older.  Parenting is a constantly changing part of our lives.  As soon as you get to a new stage, the things you thought we're hard before are gone, but now you have new challenges you weren't prepared for!  Two year olds need constant supervision because they are so mobile. you'll remember the times when you could set your baby down in a bouncer for a bit while you could get something done and how it was easier in some ways. We have to take the good with the bad and try to enjoy the here and now even when times are tough.  Don't mean to sound preachy but its true. 

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  • image +adamwife+:

    I can see why maybe it sounds patronizing, but I think people have good intentions.  I can totally see how an older woman could look at a small child and think back on all of the time she wished moments away that she now wishes she had back.  I think it's a sweet sentiment and when people say it to me I view it as a good reminder not to sweat the small stuff and just enjoy the ride.

    same here!  iTA 

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  • I hate when people say that followed by "because they grow up to be little jerks". Most of the people who tell me that aren't anything to write home about, so yeah, maybe your kid grew up to be a jerk but it doesn't mean mine will.
    image
    BFP #1: 12.30.11, MC 1.6.12 at 5w; BFP #2: 5.25.12, DS born 2.1.13; BFP #3: 9.4.14, MMC 10.13.14 at 9w
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